In my experience men fall for a woman don’t want her to change at all, but women will settle for a man who has certain key qualities with the idea of moulding him.
Oh, there another aspect to this story. I’ve seen a relative go thru the same shit. Best of Luck,honey.
What is the other aspect?
Being that it was a lesibian relationship. Don’t read much into it. But like I said, I’ve seen a relative go thru what you’re talking about, so now I have a different take on it.
oh that …yeah…cool. Hope your relative learnt a good lesson too:)
This is hauntingly similar to my first long-term relationshit. Remove the playing the X-box and add wearing jeans, and I could have written the above. I lost my individuality, and finally I had to reclaim me. I left her, and found me. I learned to stand up for myself in subsequent relationships.
you said relationshit…heeeheee naaanaaa…I’m going to tell!
Yeah hey, I don’t get it. How can something SO small bug someone so much. I always try to make people feel their best…I wonder what people get out of making people feel bad about their tastes in clothing, music etc.
Amen on that also. It were similar tiny drips , bashing, complaining that indeed resulted in a divorce.
now, I totaly understand what battery9 went through.
If the lady does not love you for the inner-side, than let go, even if it is painfull.
Lucky you had no kid…
I don’t really know if she did, but I know I did. 
I think you’re right, that seems to be the case more often than not. It’s so unfortunate and foolish though.
I think you’re right, that seems to be the case more often than not. It’s so unfortunate and foolish though.[/quote]
I wonder if that’s innate or taught behavior? That would be good to know.
[quote=“JMcNeill”][quote=“Namahottie”]
Indiana I can agree with ya. I hate the word compromising when it comes up in talks about relationships. It has always seemed like a passive way to manipulate rather than just working things out to a solution that fits both parties. Seems exhausting…[/quote]
Isn’t that what compromise means? It has nothing to do with manipulation (in the definition I think of).
[quote]
–noun 1. a settlement of differences by mutual concessions; an agreement reached by adjustment of conflicting or opposing claims, principles, etc., by reciprocal modification of demands.
[/quote][/quote]
That’s what he’s saying. When it comes up in relationship discussions, it often means manipulation - not compromise.
It is often used not in terms of “what kind of compromises can WE come up with?” But rather “what compromises are YOU going to make to fix the problem?” (Notice I said “often.”)
Matt