The natives wear seal-skin mukluks, but the igloos are very warm.
Finland is very sexually liberated. Your host may offer you the chance to sleep with his wife–it is considered rude to refuse this hospitality.
Those braided pigtails serve the same purpose as a horse’s reins. Sexy! (More so than on a horse, anyway.) Examples: Asterix and Obelix.
Finnish language is pretty much the same as Swedish, except with little slashes through the "o"s. At least that’s what they sound like to normal people. Try greeting people with a cheery “Yay borshnay yay don kadiskadoo.” Otherwise, you may take solice in the fact that most Europeans understand Esperanto.
Major industries include whaling and reindeer-herding.
Fish is a major part of their diet. You should make them leap out of the water and clap their little flippers together before letting them take it.
The official religion is Finlandborgianism, but outside the capital city of Stockholm you’ll find that most people practice fetishism.
Major political parties include Communist, Socialist, Green, Libertarian, and Anarchist. Finland remained neutral during the Cold War because they were too chicken to fight for democracy.
Modern Finnish history begins with the compilation of the national epic, “Eurovision.”
No trip to Finland is complete without a visit to a traditional bathhouse where much scourging, sweating, and mutual flagellation takes place.