So how does the average taiwanese parent raise their kid? Do they always treat them with contempt and raise them like a robot? I mean because I go to public places I see parents or whatever adult with them being real mean to them and saying nasty things to them. I mean half the stuff I have seen would most likely have the parent arrested for abuse and the child sent to the child protective service in America. It really breaks my heart seeing kids being yelled at like that, it can’t be good for them. Or is it cultural, like its somehow customary for parents to treat their kid with contempt?
You just don’t understand…
I have to agree though, some of the things I’ve seen parents do/say is just disgusting.
I have to agree though, some of the things I’ve seen parents do/say is just disgusting.[/quote]
I don’t know what they are saying; but there sure is alot of screaming each morning when the mothers are getting the kids ready for school in the morning where I live.
They seem to like them when they are little but after that alot of woman get pretty hard looking.
Yea I don’t understand it either. I started seeing how parents treated their kids when I had my 3rd graders write an essay on their best or worst day. The worst essay was about this kid who had made a 90 or something like that grade on his test. So when he got home, his mom cornered him in the bathroom and beat him in the head for it.
I thought to myself, what is the actual message this parent is sending. Beat you kids for not doing well at school because it’s going to determine your sucess later in life. I’d like to ask these parents, would they allow their bosses to do the same to them for failing on a task at work?
It is obviously cultural, and look at all of the millions of Taiwanese products of that culture. It’s not just Taiwan, it’s all of East Asia. See, they all turn out fine.
You just don’t understand…
Never been to wal-mart?
I see this shit in the US too. It isn’t just Taiwan or Asia.
I also see parents here who don’t suck.
I do have one friend who I recently chewed out for calling his honour roll, perfect attendance having daughter lazy. But for the most part, the people I know who have kids are pretty good to them.
I think it is the same way it is in the US: Some parents are asses. Some parents aren’t.
Oh no doubt there are asses for parents all over the world. I’ve met a few in Canada myself. However, it just seems that there is a greater concentration of them here.
What really gets me is the parents who have a kid and can’t be bothered actually taking the time to look after them so they send them off to a relative and see the kids like once a week. If you have a kid, everything else comes second, including work. That’s something that really pisses me off.
[quote=“rob_the_canuck”]Oh no doubt there are asses for parents all over the world. I’ve met a few in Canada myself. However, it just seems that there is a greater concentration of them here.
In a nation of 23 million people on a rather small island, odds are you are going to experience a greater concentration of anything. Think about it. It’s like having the population of Canada stuck on Vancouver Island. Sadly, it’s often the negative things that stand out immediately.
There are positives, on almost any angle.
But personally, I think the whole issue of positive/negative is clouded by the dollar drive with which it seems that many a Taiwanese is fixated on. They are trading their time for money. Time that could be well spent with their children, instead of foisting them off on others. Money that they think might later buy them anything under the sun, including perhaps, time.
In this they are surely mistaken.
Time, The Avenger!
Rob and Ginger man I would agree with you that there are parents who do spend more time at their jobs because $$$ is a god here, and suppose to do XYZ for your life. But I’ve also noticed how active these parents are in their children’s lives. Especially the fathers. I live near a park and not a day goes by where I don’t see a father bonding with his children, no matter what the age is. I do not recall seeing much of that in America. I don’t recall seeing fathers showing PDA and talking to their children in ways I’ve seen here. Granted two different cultures, but I really think at times that America could observe a thing or two from Asian families.
This is a really good point. A lot of parents do treat their children really well. Personally though, spending a day in the park with your kid does not come anywhere near making up for being out of their lives 6 out of 7 days a week. Now granted, that is a generalized statement and does not by any means apply to many parents in Taiwan. But as GM said, with such a highly condensed amount of people in such a small place, it’s the bad ones that stick out the most.
This is a really good point. A lot of parents do treat their children really well. Personally though, spending a day in the park with your kid does not come anywhere near making up for being out of their lives 6 out of 7 days a week. Now granted, that is a generalized statement and does not by any means apply to many parents in Taiwan. But as GM said, with such a highly condensed amount of people in such a small place, it’s the bad ones that stick out the most.[/quote]
Right, one day in the park doesn’t make up for those other days. But I’ve seen fathers doing this in the middle of a workday. So, I am assuming that the parent has taken time off to spend time with their child. In America, it’s not uncommon for parents to tell their kids on their day off “Give mommy/daddy sometime alone, I’m too tired.” Or “Let daddy watch the game.” Not all American parents are like that, but I would say that lately society has moved a great deal away from family orientated activities.
What I find saddest of all is the parents who tell me they realise that berating their kids for “lack of application” and running them from cram school to cram school all day is wrong, but they don’t have a clue how to break out of the vicious cycle. They know their kids are getting their imaginations crushed out of them, but there’s another test tomorrow morning, and it’s very important!!
The real problem now is not parents being too harsh but far too indulgent. Why do kids run around restaurants and cafes? Cause the parents can’t control them. Why do kids rifle through their mothers’ purses on the MRT while said mother whines “bu yao”? Cause she thinks yelling at him and expecting him to act civilized is mean.
I know what you folks are saying but the far greater problem now is parents who haven’t a clue how to maintain discipline. (BTW, these are also the same parents yelling at the kids. They yell, threaten, get the kid to stop for a moment, then ignore him or her until the pressure builds.)
I’d be willing to bet that the parents who are the most abusive towards their kids are the ones that were most abused when they were kids themselves. They probably don’t know any different. Does that excuse it? No.
Even today, Taiwan remains a fairly closed culture. 20 years ago, when todays parents were children, it was even more so. To change the attitudes towards discipline takes time. And courage.
True, but I’d rather have my parents working too much, than spending their evenings and weekends sitting in a pub/bar, like what happens too much in the west.
This is true, yet it also brings the whole gender factor into the equation. I have recently begun to study first hand how boys are totally spoiled in this culture, and all that that entails for society as a whole.
This is true, yet it also brings the whole gender factor into the equation. I have recently begun to study first hand how boys are totally spoiled in this culture, and all that that entails for society as a whole.[/quote]
Let me save you some time. They live in an Peter Pan existence. If Taiwan isn’t as close as you can get to Neverland, then I don’t know what is.
I would agree that Taiwanese kids are often just spoiled. It depends on what class division they come from in some respects, but I think there are far too few spankings given out here. My parents were fairly traditional European. We still have plenty of wooden spoons still broken from those days and looking back, boy did we deserve it!