Formosa, reminds of this little bit of journalism stiring things up a little:
From “The day today”
MORRIS: Today’s historic trade agreement between Australia and Hong Kong marks a new season of hope for the future of world trade. The two countries have been at each others’ throats for years, but now the hatchet’s been buried by a treaty which allows unrestricted trading between all parties at all levels. I’m joined now by Martin Craste, the British minister with responsibility for the Commonwealth, and Gavin Hawtry, the Australian foreign secretary in Canberra. Gentlemen, this is pretty historic stuff, well done - a future of unbridled harmony then? Australia?
HAWTRY: Yeah, I think that Martin Craste and I can be pretty satisfied - it’s a good day.
MORRIS [to Craste]: If, as in the past, Australia exceed their agreement, what will you do about it?
CRASTE: This is a pretty satisfactory treaty which I am sure will work well. Naturally, if the limits were exceeded this would be met with a firm line, but I can’t see this being necessary.
MORRIS: Mr Hawtry - he’s knocking a firm line in your direction. What are you going to do about that?
HAWTRY: Well, in that case we’d just reimpose sanctions as we did last year-
MORRIS: Sanctions! [To Craste] Hang on a second, they’ve only just swallowed their sanctions and now they’re burping them back up in your face!
CRASTE: I think sanctions is rather premature talk. Certainly if sanctions were imposed we would have to retaliate with appropriate measures. But I can’t-
MORRIS: I think ‘appropriate measures’ is a euphemism, Mr Hawtry - you know what it means, what are you going to do about that?
HAWTRY: Well, I’d just have to go back to Cabinet.
MORRIS: And ask them about what?
HAWTRY: I dunno, maybe it’s a matter for the military-
MORRIS: The military!
CRASTE: I think a military reaction is inappropriate, and this is way, way over the top.
MORRIS [to Hawtry]: Sounds like you’re being inappropriate! Are you?
HAWTRY: Course I’m not being inappropriate! Martin Craste knows that full well.
CRASTE: This is the sort of misunderstanding that I thought we’d laid to rest during our negotiating period!
MORRIS: Misunderstanding it certainly is, it’s certainly not a treaty, is it? You’re both at each others’ throats, you’re backing yourselves up with arms - what are you going to do about it? Mr Hawtry, let me give you a hint. Bang!
HAWTRY: What’re you asking me to say?
MORRIS: You know damn well what I want you to say! You’re putting yourself in a situation of armed conflict - what are you plunging yourself into?
HAWTRY: You want me to say it?
MORRIS: I want you to say it, yes!
HAWTRY: You want the word?
MORRIS: The word!
HAWTRY: I will not flinch…
MORRIS: I will not flinch from…?
HAWTRY: War.
MORRIS: War! [He’s delighted] Gentlemen, I’ll put you on hold - if fighting did break out, it would probably take place in Eastmantown in the Upper Cataracts on the Australio-Hong Kong border. Our reporter Donald Bethl’hem is there now - Donald, what’s the atmosphere like?
BETHL’HEM: Tension here is very high, Chris - the stretched twig of peace is at melting point. People here are literally bursting with war. This is very much a country that’s going to blow up in its face.
MORRIS: Well gentlemen, it seems we have little option now but to declare war immediately!
CRASTE: This - this is quite impossible, I couldn’t possibly take such a decision without referring to my superior, Chris Patten, and he’s in Hong Kong!
MORRIS: Good, because he’s on the line now via satellite. Mr Patten - what do you think of the idea of a war now?
[Patten nods his head absently.]
MORRIS: I’ll take that as a yes!
CRASTE: Very well, it’s war!
HAWTRY: War it is!