Who would win?
- Tarka the Otter
- B.A.Baracus
0 voters
Please help me settle an argument.
Who do you think would win in a fight between Tarka the Otter and B.A.Baracus?
vs 
My friend says Tarka, but I reckon BA might win.
(BA is the one on the right).
hmm tough call… they both have good building skills
I reckon BA needs Hannibal to guide him. If Hannibal is not involved in the scrp then Tarka wins hands down.
Only a fool would say the otter wins.
I pity the fool.
Hold on, now. What exactly are the conditions for said Duel? Terrain, weather, elevation,… etc.
If the Tarka the UberOtter could lure BA into the water, then it would all be over in an instant.
Especially if Tarka was feeling a tad peckish…
[quote=“TheGingerMan”]Hold on, now. What exactly are the conditions for said Duel? Terrain, weather, elevation,… etc.
If the Tarka the UberOtter could lure BA into the water, then it would all be over in an instant.
Especially if Tarka was feeling a tad peckish…[/quote]
Good points, TheGingerman.
No weapons would be allowed, but the terrain could vary. It could also include an aeroplane flight, though I doubt that could possibly matter.
Can Tarka go down BA’s trousers ?
Can Tarka team up with Lassie ?
[quote=“Big Fluffy Matthew”]Can Tarka go down BA’s trousers ?
Can Tarka team up with Lassie ?[/quote]
Yes.
No, unless BA is allowed to team up with Garfield.
This question is completely academic. The two protagonists live in such completely different worlds and have such completely different lifestyles that the chances of their meeting in combat are remote, to say the least. Therefore, you smell.
Oh yeah?? What if Tarka was bullying someone at school, and he called the A-Team?
Oh yeah?? What if Tarka was bullying someone at school, and he called the A-Team?[/quote]The whole A-team would be unfair. Unless Tarka can team up with Lassie, Hammy the hamster, and Gordon the Gopher. But then it gets complicated.
When Tarka goes down BA’s trousers, it would be over for poor BA. Assuming he has genitals, I have my doubts.
Oh yeah?? What if Tarka was bullying someone at school, and he called the A-Team?[/quote]The whole A-team would be unfair. Unless Tarka can team up with Lassie, Hammy the hamster, and Gordon the Gopher. But then it gets complicated.
When Tarka goes down BA’s trousers, it would be over for poor BA. Assuming he has genitals, I have my doubts.[/quote]
I forgot to mention that the rest of the A-Team are at a birthday party, and only B.A. can come.
Oh yeah?? What if Tarka was bullying someone at school, and he called the A-Team?[/quote]Tarka’s and OTTER, for fucks sake. He doesn’t GO to school. He just kind of slithers around, swims and eats fish all the time.
Smelly.
[quote=“irishstu”]I forgot to mention that the rest of the A-Team are at a birthday party, and only B.A. can come.[/quote]Is it a birthday party at a orphanage that the A-Team saved from an evil property developer who tried to make them sell ?
Yes. How did you know? And the irony is that it was an orphange for abandoned otters who couldn’t get into otter school.
Oh yeah?? What if Tarka was bullying someone at school, and he called the A-Team?[/quote]Tarka’s and OTTER, for fucks sake. He doesn’t GO to school. He just kind of slithers around, swims and eats fish all the time.
Smelly.[/quote]
Tarka’s not just an bogwash otter, he’s a full-blown Uber-Otter. A normal otter will eat fish, frogs, turtle, snakes and small children for a pre-breakfast snack. Then he’s on to his usual breakfast fare of fish, inner tubes, and pixies. After that, it’s a quick sprint-about on land. Rumor has it that they have been known to run even faster than a dog, albeit a dog that is heavily winded and is pining for a shag. That’s almost as fast as TheGingerMan can run to the store for some more stout. Amazing!
And given that BA is a notorious cantakerous fool, he could be easily duped into entering the water, whereupon Tarka would deliver the coup de grace with his superior eyesight, sleek fur not encumbered with 20 kgs of blingbling, and his treacherous, wily, and adept movements of the tail.
This is all assuming that Tarka is a river otter.
If he’s a sea otter, then he would just hurl abusive epithets at BA until he charged into the surf. Whereupon, Tarka, like a good citizen, would lead the odious BA unto his timely demise: surf volleyball with a pack of Orcas.
And then there’s the smell factor: WHo would win on that score? DId BA change his underpants the day before?
Fools.
Just cos you’re jealous.
Has it occurred to any of you MORONS that BA can fire his gun wildly into a crowd and miss everyone? He has never killed somuch as an ant. Tarka on the other hand (or Tarks as we call him down the nags head) routinely kills stuff and then eats it.
Tarks’ll win it hands down boys…tch…fool indeed.