[quote=“coladag”]So I’m sure I’m not the first one to be writing about an ex, and looking for legal help but here it is. I came to Taiwan with/for my now ex and we split up about a week ago. Last weekend she showed up at my apartment and refused to leave, she’s called me over 100 times this week (not exaggerating) and I just found out she is taking the bus down from Taipei once again to see me, I’m in Kaohsiung. The first legal question is if I can get a restraining order as a foreigner without his ARC. I’m on a temporary visa for the time being, though I will be getting the ARC in a few weeks since I just took a new job. She has threatened me via email/phone/text message, saying she is going to show up at my new job, call the cops on me (for no reason I swear), and get me kicked out of my apartment as I will explain next. She has also refused to leave my apartment when I asked her nicely too. Though this has been horrible in itself, I am getting the impression that it is just the beginning. I can’t sleep at night and don’t know my legal rights here.
The second question is more complex. She helped me find my new apartment through a friends mom. We don’t have a contract, just a verbal agreement of 12,000 NT /month and a 20,000 NT deposit. My ex has threatened that if I don’t stay with her, she is going to tell the owner who doesn’t speak any English that I am a bad person and make sure I get kicked out immediately. Assuming that my ex does convince the owner of me being a bad guy, can she just kick me out on the street after taking my monthly rent only a few days ago? What will the cops due if they are called? Again not ARC, at least not yet.
I know that there is the law, and then there is what really happens with the law. If anyone has knowledge or advice I would really really appreciate it, or possibly an agency that I could call. I can’t find anything that fits my situation and I don’t know what to do. I’m out of my league and honestly a bit scared of what is going to happen.[/quote]
sounds like you’re in a crappy situation. Unless you have documented proof that the property owner took your deposit and rent, it will be hard to prove. If you can, get a bank account and pay through ATM transfer, or have her sign a printed chart when you fork over the rent.
You won’t be able to get a restraining order. Are you working kindergarten? If you are, then it’s illegal even if you have an ARC at the school. If you teach only older kids and adults, you’re probably okay, as long as you are working at the very exact school that is on your ARC. You will definitely need to confirm this. Sometimes chain schools will send you off to work in another branch. However, employers will sometimes choose to fire foreigners if someone makes too much of a fuss. Like screaming outside the school every day.
Change the locks and do not let her in, ever. If she goes in, tears her clothes up and runs out crying and screaming, there is a high chance you will be really, really screwed. Be sure to triple lock your doors at all times. If you have a building security guard, show him your ex’s photo and make sure it’s clear that she should never be let in.
Document all contact you have with her. You will very likely need it later when she begins to get even crazier and maybe make false claims about you beating/raping/cheating on her. Keep any emails in a secure place. If you have a computer at your house that she has access to, do virus/malware/spyware scans in case she has installed a keylogger or something similar on your computer. Change ALL of your passwords at once, to something that is impossible for her to guess, and remember to change the security questions too, if there is any likelihood at all that she could guess them. If you use gmail, you can find "Last account activity: " at the bottom of the page and see the details link next to it. Click that and check to see if there has been any suspicious log ons. Even if there hasn’t, sign out of all other sessions. Do this for all accounts. If you don’t have a log-on password, set one and make sure it’s not 1234 or something guessable like that. If she breaks into your apartment, you don’t want her wiping your computer or using it to send out emails to your friends and family.
Take her calls only when you have the means to record your conversations. Put it on loudspeaker and use your computer/mp3 player to record or install call recording software on your phone. This is very, very important if it escalates into a he says/she says situation.
DO NOT meet her in private under any circumstance. If she shows up at your door, call the cops. If you meet her in private, sooner or later she will pull some kind of stunt. If she jumps off the balcony of your house after you try to pull her off and leave marks, you could be tried for murder. Just don’t give in to her pounding, screaming, calling, whatever.
If you have to meet her for some reason, be sure to arrange to meet at a very public place with a video camera pointed directly where you two will be standing/sitting and carry an unobtrusive recording device. If she calls you names in public, you can take legal action or say you will do so to get her off your back.
Keep evidence of all contact she makes meticulously and make sure she cannot access, erase or delete it. Save a copy online (dropbox), put it on a USB drive and hide it.
You will never be just friends. Don’t even entertain that thought. Dogs will never stop eating shit. Unless you want to be used and abused every day for the rest of your life, don’t even think about getting back together with her.