For all the journos who are pig sick that The Royal Wedding hadn’t quite been flogged to death
here’s my new report:
HRH Prince William, Duke of Cambridge, Black Eyed Pea etc. cancelled his honeymoon and flew his trusty helicopter to Pakistan where he single handed took on the evil brigand Bin Laden. After a 8 hour fight involving swords and bare knuckles he finally vanquished the enemy and the son and one or two other dastardly rogues.
God Save the Queen said he. He then gave the dead body to some Americans who were hiding around the corner.
Then he flew back home to give his new bride a good old rogering.