I’ve played a lot of chess. Like, really a lot, but I don’t improve.
The same with golf. I love the game, but I’m useless at it. There’s no way in the world I could contemplate improving my 24 handicap
Back in the day when I was earning decent money, I took a holiday in Cape Town. I was trying to play as much golf as I could, like at least every second day. When I actually hit the ball, and it didn’t dribble off the tee, it would veer off at right angles either left or right. I thought I’d go to a golf club and pay the resident pro for a lesson or two. I don’t remember where I went, but it was a nice place.
I go into the pro shop and loudly state that I’m looking for the resident professional for some lessons.
I am met with bemused grins.
Eventually, this bloke comes out of the back. Probably half my age, and with a name like Chad or Jeff.
“What can I do for you, sir?”
“I need some lessons. I’m really shit”
“Okay. Let’s go down to the driving range.”
We go down and start with the grip.
“Lemme see your grip.”
So I grip for all I’m worth.
“Nothing wrong with that grip. It’s perfect. You may be gripping a little too tightly, though.”
I relax the grip.
“Okay. Let’s see you address the ball.”
I’m tempted to say “Hello, ball! How are you doing today?” But I control myself.
“Mmmm. Not bad, but you’re a little too close to the golf ball. That’s going to cause a hook. Try a few inches back.”
“Right. Let’s watch your swing.”
“Not bad. Just try to keep your head down.”
“Great, so what do I owe you?”
“Nothing, bru. There’s nothing wrong with your technique. Your problem is here.”
And Chad taps me on the fucking forehead.
Playing guitar. No matter how much I play I still remain stuck at level 3 bog basic. For decades.
My Chinese flhency level seems to be stuck too.
Golf is one thing I got better at when a pro corrected my grip. Should have sorted that out years before .
I suppose it all comes down to how much you want it. I’m a crap guitarist (I don’t do scales and shit), but I made a name for myself by being self-taught and innovative. But it’s what I wanted to do, more than anything in the world.
I think it has way more to do with desire than talent.
The question is what defines good debate. Is it about winning, or thinking you’ve won? Using tricks to ‘win’.
There’s a growing school of thought that debate is dead. You can’t debate a set of beliefs - they are fixed - and most people are fixed in their beliefs now. In fact, appearing to have superior debating skills is self-defeating.
A good debate happens when both sides are willing to understand the other, and to present arguments that best support the position one holds.
You don’t win by shutting the opponent. You win by making them see where your ideas come from and perhaps providing some inputs for them to reconsider their position. And vice-versa, of course.
Yup. Anyone can learn to use a few rhetorical devices and turn the tables on unprepared “opponents” and make them look bad. It makes for good clicks, but accomplishes little in the way of mutual understanding, compassion and respect. A good exchange usually doesn’t end with, “But you knew that.”
Ideologies tend to overlap. Finding common ground isn’t that hard.
