Trade my beloved for?

I have this cat and, well, the problem is not that I dislike her or resent her pointlessness, but…

I’m just never home these days. I come in, tread on her, empty the poop tray, tread on her again, refill the food bowl, go to bed, and spend half an hour scratching her head before she will let me sleep. Then I get up, tread on the cat, and leave the house.

I don’t feel like I’m being a very good father, and wonder if maybe I should find her a new home. Any long-termers out there can do better than me at petting, feeding, playing?


If you’re worried about her getting bored, maybe you can get her a friend ?
Is her life really so bad ? Would she really be happier with a stranger ? (including the stress(?) of moving)

Damn, I thought the title was NOT an April fool’s joke.

How old is she? Can she understand American English as well?

Alleycat, you’re a lech. I don’t know what she sees in you.

Fluffy, I don’t know enough about cat psychology to know whether her life is good or bad in her eyes. I’m sure it’s better than being on the streets, but I don’t know how I stack up against other owners. All I can say for sure is that she makes me feel like I’m neglecting her.

IL, almost 1yo and I don’t think she’ll be much of a conversation partner in any sort of English. We’ve never progressed beyond a stern ‘no’ when I see her getting into the bin. Even a simple command like ‘get me a drink out of the fridge’ is met with puzzled stares. Do you speak feline?

What are you doing coming home so late ? Maybe you shouldn’t spend all day down the pub ?