What’s wrong with rice porridge?
The cockroach legs.
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Don’t they give you your choice of garnishes?
Only two things: rice, and porridge.
Stupid Taiwanese “breakfasts”…
It’s not porridge in Taiwan. It’s rice water.
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Some quotes from Robert Louis Stevenson: the first Steam Punk.
Upon Porridge
“The fire had burned up fairly bright, and showed me the
barest room I think I ever put my eyes on. Half a dozen
dishes stood upon the shelves; the table was laid for supper
with a bowl of porridge.”
“Meanwhile the sun was shining outside; and being very
cold in that miserable room, I knocked and shouted till my
gaoler came and let me out. He carried me to the back of
the house, where was a draw-well, and told me to “wash my
face there, if I wanted”; and when that was done, I made
the best of my own way back to the kitchen, where he had
lit the fire and was making the porridge.”
"the day passed fairly well. We had the
porridge cold again at noon, and hot
porridge at night ; porridge and small
beer was my uncle’s diet. "
“I tried to get this out of my head; but though I took
down many interesting authors, old and new, history,
poetry, and story-book, this notion of my father’s hand of
writing stuck to me; and when at length I went back into
the kitchen, and sat down once more to porridge and small
beer…”
“You took me for a country
Johnnie Raw, with no more mother-wit or courage than a
porridge stick. I took you for a good man, or no worse
than others at the least.”
“instead of asking riddles, I make bold to
say that ye would keep your breath to cool your porridge.”
“no cloth to lay; the meals were either of oatmeal porridge
or salt junk, except twice a week, when there was duff”
"As soon as we had eaten (and porridge and whey was the
best of the good man’s diet) "
“There was a low concealed place in a
turning of the glen, where we were so bold as to make fire:
so that we could warm ourselves when the clouds set in, and
cook hot porridge, and grill the little trouts that we caught
with our hands under the stones and overhanging banks of
the burn. This was indeed our chief pleasure and business;”
“the devil may fly away with him, for what I care;
for he will no be worth the salt to his porridge.”
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In Taiwan, congee is prepared in the same way as in Fujian Province, China, and consists of rice and water, with few other ingredients. Sweet potato is often added for taste, and eggs are sometimes beaten into it to thicken it to a gruel. As with most Chinese styles, congee is often served to the ill and those with difficulty chewing. A variety of side dishes are often served with congee, as well.
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Why does this sound like what happens when you don’t bathe for a week?
But you don’t just eat congee by itself. It’s good with side dishes the same way you don’t eat rice by itself.
I believe I’m starting to gain new insight into the eccentric Mr. Phillips.
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I’m only ever thinkin’ bout where me next “meal” is coming from. From mill, mayhaps.
What’s wrong with rice porridge? It’s not congee. And there is no good congee in Taiwan.
Can you do that in a Scottish accent? 
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(singing)
Don’t be gruel…to a heart that’s true.
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I hear you can get a good milkfish congee in Tainan, but don’t, god-forbid, ask for an extra bowl of soup.
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Sorry, I can’t help wondering what Ibis thinks.
That is a false dichotomy.
There is rice, or rice porridge: that is your choice of breakfast.
That’s a cruel joke.
Well, if you’re going to eat a bowl of rice porridge for breakfast, you might as well eat a bowl of crème brûlée.