I’ve recently noticed that there are two distinct peeing styles men have:
Ninja - Peeing on the outer rim of the toilet so the urination silently glides into the bowl of the toilet. Doing it this way doesn’t give up your position in a house/apartment, so you can continue your Ninja task at hand.
Pirate - Peeing directly into the bowl of the toilet, thus filling the whole apartment/house with this bleeburliplelleeberpoping noise, thus giving up your position in a house/apartment so a Ninja can continue his Ninja task at hand (my blade has already tasted pirate blood twice this morning.)
Caveman… I’m not sure if anyone living the city with internet access pees caveman style on a daily basis (only the polls will tell), but this style is known to appear after a night out drinking like a pirate (but without the cast-iron stomach that goes with piratehood.)
Hmm, interesting topic. My trains of thought are running faster than the high speed rail. But with far less chance of a bodycount. Women also have many styles of peeing. Obviously, Buttercup is far too much of a lady to detail how she pees, as I would imagine many of the forumosan ladies are, but let’s just say ‘ninja’ and ‘pirate’ would barely even splash the seat of modus operandii.
MTK -
Pirate here.
Funny topic; this was actually discussed in a college class I was in many years ago.
The classroom was very close to the mens bathroom. And as it was a small class, 10 - 12 or so, and the prof was a very casual guy, it wasn’t unusual for someone, male or female, to take a toilet break when needed.
The echo from the bathroom were clear in the hallway and as we mostly kept the door open to let the breeze cool off the room, it was audible in the room.
One guy from the class was a very loud ‘pirate’ - so loud in fact that when he returned from to the room the class was laughing along with the Prof about his noise. This led to an impromptu poll regarding aiming points when taking a leak. The women in the class were fascinated that some guys liked to make noise by firing dead-center and some were ‘ninjas’ and hit the sides to deflect the sound. Pirates Rule!
This reminds me of the scene in The Last Emperor in which the deposed Henry Pu-Yi is in a re-education camp, and a guard teaches him how to pee silently into a bucket.
Of course, if you’re doing it in the middle of the night and you don’t want to turn on the lights, you’ve got to do it pirate style. Otherwise, you have no idea if you’re even getting it in the bowl.
Generally I would have to go with Pirate. However, there are times I do it like a ninja, like when I’m hunting a ninja, or when politeness calls for it.
After tasting ninja blood, nothing comes close to a good 'ole full bodied Rum inspired Pirate wizz.
Yes, it really explains why women here tend to be the most retentive when it comes to taking your shoes off before you come… it’s because they’ve been in the trenches (so to speak) and know.
Would it really help to make the squatters wider for those suffering from spatial retardation (read: lack of spatial intelligence) and to thwart those women who might be trying to mark their territory or something?
I personally am water nymph. I run the tap both for background and inspiration while re-strooming myself. If I need people to know my business, I’d tell them myself.
How the f@ck is that possible? I mean local girls are physically equivalent to foreign girls… are they trying to stand up? squatting on the toilet? Straddling it backwards?
How the f@ck is that possible? I mean local girls are physically equivalent to foreign girls… are they trying to stand up? squatting on the toilet? Straddling it backwards?[/quote]
Marking territory?
Could someone help me translate the following verse into traditional Chinese characters to graffiti in the loo?
“If you sprinkle when you tinkle, be a sweetie and wipe the seatie.”
How the f@ck is that possible? I mean local girls are physically equivalent to foreign girls… are they trying to stand up? squatting on the toilet? Straddling it backwards?[/quote]
This is an easy one:
Most Western girls are trimmed, making the flow nice and controlled.
Taiwanese girls mostly have long pubic hairs. Urine flows along these hairs uncontrollably and in various directions.
How the f@ck is that possible? I mean local girls are physically equivalent to foreign girls… are they trying to stand up? squatting on the toilet? Straddling it backwards?[/quote]
This is an easy one:
Most Western girls are trimmed, making the flow nice and controlled.
Taiwanese girls mostly have long pubic hairs. Urine flows along these hairs uncontrollably and in various directions.[/quote]
:bravo:
I nominate that for classic post status.
BTW…Tash, do you know where I can get a good beard trimmer? (note: thanks for the offer, but I won’t be borrowing yours )
Wow; you’re right! I always wondered why women bothered with squat toilets, these days, when they can’t aim. Especially in hot countries like Thailand, where open-toed footwear is de rigeur. I know all the theories about them being more hygienic, etc, but not if you are a inch deep in pee soup.
or when politeness calls for it.
You just reminded me of my favorite flash animation on the net: