Has this been established though? He thinks people should wait till marriage. You don’t always get everything you want.
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OK, fair point.
We do know he asked about her hymen. That seems to indicate it does matter. Anyway, it might matter, so a potential problem exists in fact.
I’m not convinced. It sounds to me like he’s just hesitant about doing sex because he doesn’t know a thing about it.
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Maybe! maybe he wouldn’t care. I don’t see how you lose by being up front about it though really, unless you want to maintain the relationship with him even if you have to lie about it at some point.
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Uneducated on the hymen breaking, yes. But he may care about saving oneself until marriage regardless. It doesn’t really change her situation. She isn’t a virgin, and that might matter to some people. But as dr Milner said, you don’t always get everything you want.
Yeah honestly, I think OP missed a good chance to just be like “The virgin with hymen thing is a myth and also I have had sex before.”
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Yeah that was probably a good time.
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Why? This is the most healthy relationship I’ve ever been in.
If it’s as good as you say it is, you might as well communicate with him about your sexual history. Maybe it doesn’t matter to him. Maybe he’ll get over it. Or maybe you’ll break up. It all works out for the best either way.
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It sounds like there’s a gap in values that may be challenging to bridge. Doesn’t mean it’s not worth trying.
If that’s your feeling, really, if you never tell him you had sex before, who’s going to be the wiser? Maybe you just forgot about it 
Reset, be honest in the future
I’m not sure I agree. The longer she waits, the more it will hurt if not being a virgin is a dealbreaker.
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Any man saying this in 2019 should be sent to a desert island. Who gives a fuck about a hymen anymore?
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What if she never fesses up. It’s a genuine conundrum . In the end I would look to my own values and see where they sit. Taiwanese people abd their families often demand a lot although being a virgin is really on the conservative side even for Taiwan . What else is in the future , this could only be a small part of a bigger picture.
Is this his deal or something to please the parents. When in doubt I always ask the priest what I should do, say a little prayer , hymen.
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I prefer the lay your cards on the table strategy, but this could work too. Depends on the person though. Some people are better liars than others. And can we all stop repeating the word “hymen” please? It’s giving me the willies.
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Doesn’t seem respectful to the other person this way. It might not be important to you, it’s important to some other people regardless of how you feel. He may never find out, he might find out.
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I didn’t say hymen.
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I’m not sure it’s just because he’s Taiwanese. He may be a Christian or Muslim.
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