Young German trying to understand/help young Taiwanese (face, "strange" behaviour)

Hello folks,
I want to ask if someone knows if young taiwanese (About 20 years) have this keeping face thing the same way as the chinese and japanese have (Do not show feelings to others and all of this stuff) I know it is hard to answer this question because Taiwan has more than one citizen, but how is the average among the folks?

Regards, hope you can help me.

It may not be exactly the same, but there are broad similarities about that in this part of the world, yes.

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How much similarity? And is there a way to get near on those (My experience) very shy people?

Umm, a lot? I wouldn’t generalize too much among individuals, just be aware that pushing people into a corner on things is liable to lead to a longer term reaction than you might expect with Westerners. As far as shyness, the same way as with any shy person, in general. Sometimes that’s just impossible more or less. Are you having some kind of specific issue with someone?

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Yes

Hmm,

I think you can call that specific, its a young Taiwanese I have to do with in my job, he is very shy against me (And all others in the company) and lets nobody near him, I know that the Corona pandemic is a special challange in those times too. But I think after your declaration it is normal that he is so shy…

What, literally? Or figuratively?

Figuratively (We are not crazy, nobody would want to touch in those time another one, and not in those time it would be the same because why should we want to touch a “Stranger”)

It might take some time. Try inviting him to stuff you do occasionally even if he usually refuses (Taiwanese people would even exercise some subtle social pressure about this) or include him in on small gifts of local snacks or something. He may just be unsure of his language skills or something? Or he may be a total introvert, or just an antisocial person. Hard to say

My main problem is (I dont know if I am right in this case ) that some people say I could feel if someone is not ok. And yes, it has worked the last time, on some of my colleauges. I have on him the same feeling, and yes, if I could, and he would agree, and we didnt have Corona I would take him in my arms because I think he needs help. I cannot say why, but theres something I cant say ughly… He looks so let us call it sad.

I will see if I can take him somewhere to come a little bit near him (Eventually he speaks then a little bit about himself) but in the actual times it is hard to do because in Germany virtually everything is closed…

What, literally? I wouldn’t do that :slight_smile: Give it time, you can’t push these things too hard. Give people some space, be kind. If he’s liable to warm up, he will in time.

Okay, I will wait, I know sometimes I am too fast, and I think Asians will need some time to get warm with others.

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So you are both working in Germany? He is homesick.

Yes, we work both in Germany, he came from a co working company (Taiwanese software company) and has here only to install and initialize some systems on a self driving machine. I really dont know how old he is, but I think from how old he looks about 20 Years, that would be a little bit young probably? But it could be that he is homesick. But I think I will not been able to help him then?

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I thought the same thing, he sounds like he might be homesick.
People in Taiwan like to give gifts, even if they might not express their emotions so well sometimes, giving a thoughtful gift can often say what can’t be expressed in words. Maybe your co-worker would appreciate a well thought out, tactful gift.

But would be such one for example? I really dont know what to take in this case, and as I heared gifts in Asia can be a pile of traps if you dont know what, how usw…?

Are there any Chinese pastry shops nearby? (Sorry I’ve never been to Germany so not sure if they can be found there) A great gift would be like a box of pineapple cakes.

I guess a nicely wrapped small box of cookies would good too.

The point is nicely wrapped.

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Okay, I think I will find some nicely wrapped cookies, here, that should not be the problem. I will try to sleep now, man I can´t even sleep anymore because of this “He is not okay” Feeling, I really make myself too many thoughts about it I think :cry:

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I am Japanese and I think it is not because he is Asian, but it is just because he is very shy. I guess there is no other Chinese peer in the office that he can talk to? And I think it is great you have a concern for him. Small gift or even just a little conversation (even if he might not be very responsive) may be nice.

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