Young German trying to understand/help young Taiwanese (face, "strange" behaviour)

I was in Japan last year. Didn’t have to pay internet either.

Nor the most. One of the most.

Did you buy him chocolate or flowers as I suggested?

You can also watch a movie and have dinner together. A comedy would do, something cheerful is what he seems to need. Recently I watched “Brüno” and it’s quite amusing. Then you can give him something special from your country, I don’t know… How about German sausage?

Hope this helps.

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uh… so basically you are attracted to him.

And the fact that he wants to cuddle with you, might suggest that finds comfort in you.

You’ve put yourself into a compromising position by offering to let him stay with you. All this awkwardness you feel may be sexual tension between you two.

Just make sure your actions don’t land you in any sexual harassment situation.

He already moved into the OP’s house and they’re cuddling together. I think it’s way past the warning stage.

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What is the name of boy on boi manga? ya yoi? let me google it. [no, not by image search, lol]

Yaoi.

I keep smelling troll. I understand we shouldn’t call out trolls, but I am more concerned with the purported individual in crisis, not so much the OP. No offense. I imagine most of you are playing along just for the free erotica.

As for @Dr_Milker 's local chinese food:

DO NOT! If he is already looking at train schedules for one-way tickets back home to celebrate ghost month early, eating at a German “chinese” restaurant may put him over the edge.

What city are you in, btw?

@keoni sorry for the direct reply, I will eventually understand which reply button to hit, and when.

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Yeah me too. It’s getting a bit ridiculous IMHO. 'He’s moved in and cuddling with me ’ lol.
And yet we are supposed to keep an ‘open’ mind.

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I wouldn’t be shocked if OP is already in that situation.

I think this thread reveals some of you guys’ obsession with sex. The OP never mention anything not even remotely related to that yet here you are guys masturbating to the idea of some homosexual couch love…

Since you guys are in Germany, ask him if he knows about the articles by Sanming Li Lianjie (Sanming Jet Li, 三民李連杰). He’s probably going to get a smile out of that if he has read those articles. Since he is a Taiwanese software engineer, chances are he has.

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LOL… don’t play innocent Mr. Double Entendres

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:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

I am keeping an open mind here.

You shouldn’t be asking this as if this was a Taiwanese thing. No self-respecting Taiwanese person would cry in front of someone they barely know and ask to be cuddled.

And let’s be honest here, if this was actually a real story, you guys should just have sex.

So much has been going on since last I visited this thread. I am sorry OP, but this is the funniest thread I have encountered since I came to forumosa.

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Why would you be sorry for that?

Well OP does all out of goodwill. So I don’t mean any disrespect, but how things go down looks just very funny.

I know, and that said me that he is in big need, an has problems he cant solve by himself. In Germany the people are in case of feelings not that shy, but not even here smeone would do that. It seems that he trusts me, otherwise I think he wouldnt be so affectionate to me.

I think not that it would be a good idea to have sex with a person that searches only near and you dont know if he wants that too.

Don´t worry about laughing about this thread, you should see some of my colleauges…

I have spoken with my boss, he has no problem if the taiwanese stays by me, but said I should tell him if he wants to stay longer, it seems that the taiwanese company pays the hotel room, but then we have to pay the taiwanese company to pay for the hotel room, but until yet the taiwanese company does not know about his problems and this entire story, we have decided to keep thast internal for first, because we dont want to make him problems in his job.

What I have found out is, that it seems his main problems are fear because mainland china, and problems between him and his parents, he loves it to cuddle with me, and it seems he does that because his parents didnt allowed it.

He shows some interest in computer like things like my 4004, but I cannot explain him so much about it because I know some basic instructions of that thing and am probably able to program it in the worst possible way, but I have not enough knowledge to explain anopther one facts about this thing (Found it by myself in a scrapyard, include the 4001, 4002 and 4003, that are needed to run the 4004, but no PCB for it to run it) I really dont know why such a person in todays time interests himself in things like assembler, those languages died long time ago, and I know only a little bit about it because I disassemble some small ARM binaries for hobby projects sometime.

I think I will able to help him at least a little bit, with this sadness problem.

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Hello folks again.

I have now observated the behavior of my guest some time, spoken with him a little bit in calm, and I think I know now whats his problem, but have no idea how to help him. I think its like that: He is gay, but his parents see this as sickness, and blamed him for being gay, that had lead to his problems and it would declare why he sticks so much on me, he simply searches for near and probably for more, but I dont know that and will do nothing, if he does nothing in this direction. The big question in this case is now, how to help him because if he goes back to Taiwan, his problems will be the same, it sems that his parents see gayness as sickness, and dont accept it. I am not completely sure if I have understood that right (Its a little bit difficult to understand a person that tells you something and 10 minutes later he tells it different) the only thing I know is: I want to help him, and have no idea how. If heres someone who has experinced such a problem between his parents and himself it would be great if he can tell me how he solved it, it seems that my visitor is absolutely overwhelmed with those tensions between him and his parents.

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Maybe there’s no simple answer for your friend, because it must be painful when one’s parents disapprove or refuse to accept their child. even more so in a traditional Taiwanese family, where children are expected to show obedience and respect to their parents.

It seems his problem is, first of all, his relationship with his parents. If they refuse to accept him, and if they think he can choose not to be gay (when he really is), then he’s facing the same position as any young gay person who’s trying to come out. I think it would really help him if he could talk to other young gay people whose parents opposed or criticized the children’s sexuality.

My second thought is that this is also his personal psychological or emotional issue: your friend is bound to struggle with issues of identity and feelings of self-worth when his parents object or disapprove of him, no matter how strong he is! I would encourage him to talk with a counselor who understands gay issues, particularly after he returns to Taiwan. With Skype and a zoom calls, I know that therapists all over the globe are offering online therapy meetings. I bet he can find someone to talk with.

Without knowing him, I’m guessing he needs some good friends in his personal life who understand what he’s going through. Maybe he needs to become part of a gay community for the support he needs? This is possible in Taiwan.

Taiwan is a fairly tolerant place when it comes to young gay people. When your friend returns to Taiwan, there are gay communities that he can join and people who he can reach out to. In recent years Taiwan has even taken steps to legalize gay marriage.

In his personal life, your friend may not know any tolerant or accepting individuals. But if he’s willing to broaden his social life and make new friends he can find accepting gay friends in Taiwan. He can also find straight friends who aren’t concerned about his sexuality! But I’m assuming it would benefit him to talk to others who struggled with his same problem.

Because he has trusted and confided in you, your role is simply to listen, and reassure him that it will be alright. And tell him that there’s nothing wrong with him, and he can live a happy life.

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