Dumb & Dumber


#1

What are some of the dumbest things you have heard about, seen, or read about?


#2

The Human Catapult - Splat!

Aren't Americans usually the ones to pull really dumb stunts? Isn't Jackass from the states? Yes, but there is some real competition in England where some university students created a medieval-themed jackass-like stunt.

Oxford University has an unofficial club called the Oxford Stunt Factory. Last year they used a replica medieval catapult to sling stupid people through the air. This being Oxford and all, they weighed each idiot first and then calibrated the catapult so that it would fire people through the air in a 30-yard arc into a safety net. That was the theory anyway.

It worked great for the first five volunteer missiles. Number six was not so lucky. Something went wrong and a 19 y/o biochemistry student missed the net and died.

Oxford Stunt Factory says they did not know what had gone wrong. Two of the organizers have been charged by police for manslaughter. They should be charged with criminal idiocy.

Way to go Oxford!


#3

Are you really, really, really sure you can handle drugs? Strange things sometimes happen when people use drugs. So think about this story the next time you want to get high.

Druggie severs, cooks and eats own penis

A 30-something guy in Kuala Lumpur got stoned out of his gourd, heard some voices telling him to do stuff, and whacked off his weenie. If that is not bad enough, he then cooked it. And then he ate it!

He didn't realize anything was slightly wrong until he saw blood gushing from his crotch. So what did he do? Like a kid in trouble, he got his mother to take him to the hospital. Doctors say he will survive but will have problems urinating. Well, duh.
.


#4

And I thought the bureaucrats in Taiwan were bad!

[quote="The Guardian"]
[url=http://www.guardian.co.uk/elsewhere/journalist/story/0,7792,1000990,00.html]Hell is Belgian bureaucrats[/url]

In Brussels, you can end up in court for taking your rubbish out a day early. Andrew Osborn reports

Friday July 18, 2003

It may be small in size, but Belgium is frighteningly big on bureaucracy.

The days when Congo's vast territory was administered from Brussels have long since passed into the mists of time, but nobody seems to have told the country's small army of "fonctionnaires".

Armed with a battery of Dickensian stamps, a rulebook as obtuse as it is thick and the mindset of Cruella De Vil, they do their best to make the life of the ordinary citizen a special Belgian form of hell.

Switzerland is often accused of having more rules than cows but Belgium is not far behind, and for its bureaucrats no detail is too small. The mentality of officialdom here is not for the faint-hearted.

And while they appear merciless in prosecuting minor legal transgressions, when it comes to the really big things - like bringing convicted child paedophile Marc Dutroux to court seven years after he was first arrested on charges of child killing and kidnapping - well, you may as well whistle in the cold north wind.

Nor do they seem to give a fig about drink driving.

Hoegaarden-bloated Belgians pour out of the capital's bars in the small hours almost every night of the week, only to jump behind the wheel and zigzag home - indeed, it is almost considered rude not to. On the rare occasions when they are stopped most are let off or escape with a small fine.

No, the Belgian system pours its energy into combating other perceived sins.

Everyone has their own story to tell, usually with their brow furrowed, their head shaking in disbelief, and their mouth spewing a stream of unprintable expletives.

I was reminded of this when I sold my car recently. Sticking a neat "for sale" sign in the back window of my car as I have seen many Belgians do, I thought I would be ok.

I was wrong. A phone call from the local policeman swiftly followed with a stern warning to remove the offending sign or face the consequences. It is illegal to sell goods on the public highway, I was told, and a nameless neighbour, bless them, had had the good sense to report my misdemeanour to the authorities.

Then there is the issue of rubbish.

Put it out on the wrong day or in the wrong type of bag and you are likely to bring down the entire weight of the Belgian establishment on you. A friend recently received a letter saying she had been fined 80 euros (


#5

Drunk German comes up with sex addiction cure

Are you addicted to sex? If so, would you even want to be cured?

Most people wouldn't. But this 41 year old German guy living in Berlin felt an overwhelming compulsion to come up with his own irreversible cure.

And the treatment?

Drink a lot of vodka, pluck up some courage, get a sharp knife, drop the pants, and then do a little amateur surgery.

Yep, another idiot whacked off his own weeny.

Afterwards he called up a friend to he'd done something stupid. The friend called the polizei and they arrived found the man in his apartment and his severed weeny under the kitchen table. EMS rushed both man and penis to a hospital. However, the man did not want his penis to be reattached.

Way to go dude!

What is it with guys that compels them to do that? That has got to be the dumbest thing in the world for a man to ever do to himself.
.


#6

You can't be serious.

:unamused:


#7

The Darwin Awards are a good source for some of the dumbest things you'll ever hear about.

Here's one funny example:


#8

Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid ride again:


#9

I'm sorry, but these are just too funny:

:laughing: :laughing: :laughing:


#10

Dumb and Greedy

Harvard University professor and cancer institute researcher Xu Weldong fell for the Nigerian 419 scam in hopes of making tens of millions in quick profit.

After the the usual "unforseen expenses" problem popped up he started hitting up students, colleagues and friends for cash, supposedly for SARS research in China. He collected $600,000, which he sent to Lagos.

Boston police said that Xu would not admit that he had himself been scammed and told them the was investing the money in a Nigerian business venture in which he expected a $50 million return.

news.bostonherald.com/localRegio ... cleid=3118

thebostonchannel.com/news/29 ... etail.html

theregister.co.uk/content/6/36699.html


#11

The penis-cutoff-ers strike again:
story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=s ... odia_penis


#12

Here’s for instance a “Lab” assignment from the “college” I unfortunately enrolled with:

“Change the shape of the box below from green background to orange and decrease the border radius by 50%”.

And below, they show a square with green background on the left, and a circle with orange background on the right.

So according to them, by decreasing the radius of a square you end up with a circle.

The most alarming thing is that almost no one in my “class” is bothered by this intergalactic idiocy. They are almost all millennials…

I really hope Satan is coming soon, so I can get out of here. I’m so fed up with all the retards.