add the line "
I donāt have any careful balls to adjust.
Rummaging vigorously at olā happy-go-lucky Ernest seems to work fine thoā. Makes me feel better anyway.
Actually, I donāt really see people staring at me a lot. Small kids get curious occasionally, but thatās kids everywhere and Iām all in favour of encouraging curiousity. Really, I donāt see a problem here.
Oh, and will someone please explain to Formosa that āMoslemā - even when spelt correctly - is not a race and there are no obvious physical characteristics that separate moslems from other people.
Iāve met chinese moslems, blond blue-eyed moslems, blond blue-eyed buddhists, chinese buddhists, chinese christians, semitic christians, arabic jews, and tons of people of all races whose religious beliefs are entirely their own business and not related to their genetic heritage at all.
Also, the āweā that Formosa refers to includes people of various ethnicities and religious backgrounds but are also not chinese in appearance. We are used to seeing Africans and āmosleemsā because some of us are Africans and/or āmosleemsā.
[quote=āAlienā]What I canāt stand is that parents seem to think itās perfectly ok and smile at how adorable their kids are for having noticed the monkey.[/quote]I see Iām not the only monkey around here.
I agreeā¦ I really dislike how parents encourage that kind of behavior. No modesty at all. 
Where in the world did the West get the false stereotype that Asians are modest? :?
[quote=āformosaā]actually, I have found that the pointing and staring is not offensive at all and not at all ill-intentioned. itās just Asia. they are curious. and surprised. and most of all, excited, happy.
that is why they donāt understand when we get so angry when they do this.[/quote]
So true. The foreigner gets angry and often the person at the receiving end of the anger doesnāt know why or at least thinks the foreigner is a major whiner. Itās even better when the foreigner is one of those whoās always complaining about the rude behavior of the locals.
I wonder how many of these foreigners would be so aggressive in their home countries if someone stared or pointed at them? Just goes to show how safe this place is. You can get upset or even thump someoneās car hood with few worries of them shooting you.
twmc: i agree with you 100%.
BTW, FTR, for the record, I am of African Moslem stock myself. What I meant is the staring is passe (French word) in the West,while it is still de rigeur (French word) in the East. Go figure. Thatās all.
Eff
I wish the city would ban dogs from more parks. Iām not scared of them, but why should I have to put up with someone elseās decision to buy an animal that yaps and craps all over the place?
I like to quote the old TV commercial to them:
[quote=āBeachside Queenslanderā]Iām with Tigerman.
If the parents can be engaged in conversation then I usually tell them
doesnāt anyone practice zen around here? relax everyone. they are not shooting you with bullets. you are in their country. in their country you are surprising/cool/handsome/beautiful/sexy/out of this world. literally. enjoy the attention. and hand out those name cards with a smile. I met my GF this way! she was staring, i got mad, started yelling, almost said fuck you and then ā¦ and nowā¦what can i say?
zen
That sounds more Sun Tzu than Zen you old warhorse.
Sound advice.
The only place I canāt stand the stares is in the MRT when Iām hungover. I know theyāre staring even though everytime I look at them theyāve already looked away. Sleazy bastards. To avoid discomfort I look for the best rack and lock on until the the poor lass is so uncomfortable she flees into the next carriage and Iām free to pick my next target. You can clear quite a bt of room for yourself like this Iāve found.
HG
[quote=āformosaā]doesnāt anyone practice zen around here? relax everyone. they are not shooting you with bullets. you are in their country. in their country you are surprising/cool/handsome/beautiful/sexy/out of this world. literally. enjoy the attention. and hand out those name cards with a smile. I met my GF this way! she was staring, I got mad, started yelling, almost said fuck you and then ā¦ and nowā¦what can I say?
zen[/quote]
And what is the spiritual goal of Zen? Satori is the spiritual goal of Zen. Satori roughly translates to individual Enligthtenment, or a flash of sudden awareness. I think a flash of sudden awareness would do a lot of folks a lot of good.
The only way that one can āattainā Satori is through personal experience. The traditional way of achieving Satori, but NOT the only way, is through the use of Koans. Koans are āriddlesā that students use to assist in the realization of Satori; these words and phrases were also used by the early Zen masters.
Now, I am by no means a Zen master. However, I like to think that I am performing an invaluable service to the individual in helping him/her to attain Satori, or enlightenment whenever I point out to a parent that his/her child should be better mannered, and that it is the fault of the parent that his/her child is not better mannered ā kinda like using a Koan, or like hitting them in the head with a stickā¦ that too was supposed to bring on a sudden awareness!
Zen, indeed!
Ah! But can you use that loathsome anchor to Taiwanās development, Confuse us, to obtain Sapporo? I mean Suntory? I mean that other one.
HG
I used a large number of responses depending on my mood when in China because it happens regularly there. In Taipei, I get it only about twice a month, I just leave.
I would never tell a parent his kid doesnāt have any manners. I just tolerate being pointed and stared at by kids. They donāt know any better.
If an adult comments that there is a big nose in the room, I usually compliment the person on his/her amazing powers of observation. The humor is lost on them, but I get to laugh.
If I am walking with a lovely girl on my arm, and a bunch of dudes stare at us, depending on my mood, I often kiss her full on the mouth, then turn and laugh out loud at the fellows. I make sure I have the advantage should a fight erupt. One never does. I only do this once in a while.
I tend to do the same. Asking someone not to point is one thing, but humiliating a parent in front of a child or vice versa is really quite an immature thing to do and a sign that a vacation is probably needed.
I find it effective to point at the mothers, and then point at my genitals, and then point back at the mothers, and then back to my private parts, etc. back and forth.
Excellent analysis.
I tend to squirm and get all flustered, unless Iām in control of the situation and want them to be noticing me.
Sometimes, it can be extremely positive. For example, if Iām swimming up in the mountains and a group of cute xiaojies come by and start doing the staring, pointing and commenting thing, I can play up to them, respond to their attention, and take it as an invitation to become acquainted, which Iām very glad to accept. Iāve got to know quite a few little sweeties like that in the past.
I tend to do the same. Asking someone not to point is one thing, but humiliating a parent in front of a child or vice versa is really quite an immature thing to do and a sign that a vacation is probably needed.[/quote]
I think that in some situations pointing out inappropriate behavior is appropriate. As I stated, my reaction depends on my particular mood and usually I do not react at all. But when such pointing , staring and or giggling is directed at my son and I, my tolerence is low and my mood turns bad.
Why should my intolerance of boorish behavior be a sign that I need a vacation?
Iām fairly certain that Taiwanese people are uncomfortable in certain situations where they are the focus of unwanted attention and scrutiny. As such, IMO, the golden rule applies when they cause me or my son similar discomfort. That is, if I know I am uncomfortable in certain situations, I will try my best not to put others in similar uncomfortable situations.
[quote=ātigermanā]I think that in some situations pointing out inappropriate behavior is appropriate. As I stated, my reaction depends on my particular mood and usually I do not react at all. But when such pointing , staring and or giggling is directed at my son and I, my tolerence is low and my mood turns bad.
Why should my intolerance of boorish behavior be a sign that I need a vacation?
Iām fairly certain that Taiwanese people are uncomfortable in certain situations where they are the focus of unwanted attention and scrutiny. As such, IMO, the golden rule applies when they cause me or my son similar discomfort. That is, if I know I am uncomfortable in certain situations, I will try my best not to put others in similar uncomfortable situations.[/quote]
It would be appropriate in some very, very limited cases. But for many of the foreigners I know, overreaction has become the norm and every incident of being looked or pointed at is taken as a personal affront (it includes freaking out when a Taiwanese is just pointing out the window or looking blankly into space and not even interested in the foreigner; there is just the assumption that the person is staring). Being rude to a parent in front of his/her child is on the whole immature (and I would say the same if you did something to a Taiwanese and that Taiwanese made you look like a complete fool in front of your son). Itās not cool.
And right you are too. Especially when your sonās involved.
I recall one awful trip to the zoo in China many years back with my son where we quickly turned into the best exhibit in the joint. Although they mercifully stopped short of granting us the peanut tossing meted out to the other poor inhabitants of that very sad place my lad was clearly not enjoying the attention and me neither. Stupidly I adoted the attitude that āthey donāt get to see many foreignersā and promptly spoiled our dayās outing. Who knows what damage that could do to a kid over the long term.
What gets me about the stares here in Taiwan is that Iād expect better. For chrisake this is Taipei not Urumuqi! Most Taiwanese seem to have been overseas but the stares just remind me that this place (Taipei) lacks the sophistication of a real international city.
HG