The Wisdom of Tommy525

This is a tribute to our esteemed and long-time poster @tommy525. Many times in the past, I have appreciated the nuggets of wisdom he has offered as suggestions. It’s long occurred to me that compiling some of these would be a useful exercise and inspirational to many. Unfortunately, as is also true for many of the renowned repositories of knowledge in history, a wealth of material has certainly been lost in the winds of Temp. We will have to make do the best we can with what remains. Thanks Tommy for kindly agreeing to the publication of this compendium.

  • Don’t be hiring hostesses and not paying
  • Strive for perfection in what you do, but don’t demand perfection from others and you are one step closer to nirvana
  • Don’t go out with 4 strange men you meet in a disco
  • Don’t get in shit with the wrong people and if you do, apologize fast
  • ALWAYS FRICKIN CHECK ALL THE DOGGONE FRICKIN WEBSITES BEFORE MAKING YOUR BOOKING
  • Don’t drink and drive under any circumstance
  • SMASH ALL ROACHES
  • Always better to be late then to be in an accident or get a speeding ticket, etc.
  • A man will always favor his dog over an ex
  • You never know who you are messing with so be prepared to be messed with if you mess with someone…anyone
  • You can win over her parents
  • Do as you do and don’t get caught
  • Don’t run from cops
  • If you are on a scoot be nice to guys in cars because they can mow you down
  • Let the Taiwanese in the group get involved
  • Bang her once if you like her and get the chance
  • If you are a blue collar worker you may be arrested at any time
  • Don’t go out in your own car to drink
  • You may still not be safe when in a “safe” area
  • Ride safely with all six senses and slow speed and expect the unexpected 100000pct of the time
  • Don’t worry be happy
  • Never introduce a possible competitor to your boyfriend/girlfriend as the case may be
  • Be careful out there and don’t mess with another guy’s woman
  • For a first timer who intends to reside in Taipei for a year or two, he/she should go to Jakarta first
  • DON’T even think of eating anything in a store without paying for it first
  • Call the police and file a complaint, don’t go there and solve it yourself
  • A good car can be kept longer then five years
  • Never overstay
  • IF you own a public service facility such as a restaurant either respond with “the customer is always right” attitude or never respond at all
  • Don’t buy ON SALE beer, it ain’t the same
  • No matter what keep ur paws to thyself
  • Never confess to a murder you didn’t do. Even if you are a minor and a girl.
  • Don’t walk in the street without facing traffic at all times
  • IN Taiwan…NEVER…NEVER…(did I say NEVER??) pay anyone in advance
  • Teach in Taiwan and be a hands on student of LIFE
  • Don’t marry foreign ladies when in Taiwan if she isn’t happy there and you don’t plan to move
  • Rethink your plan of action if it involved murder
  • Save everything you want on CD R or CD RW but NOT on the HDD
  • Avoid going home late at nite with a gangster perm, slowing down in a calculating fashion and also rolling down both front windows when you see a police roadblock
  • Be pushy not pussy
  • DON’T DRINK AND MESS WITH TAIWAN COPS
  • Don’t buy 'em, just rent 'em
  • HAPPY HOUR TILL LANDING while flying
  • Go always with the gentlest woman you can find
  • Don’t crash and burn
8 Likes

I can personally attest to no. 3. Happy hour till landing while flying, though? That’s gonna give you a nasty headache.

along with …

Words of wisdom.

1 Like

It’s about time. There’s a whole bunch of classic tommyisms that made me LOL at the time.

Tommy525 puts me in mind of a slightly less misanthropic Karl Pilkington, for some reason.

Exceptions are the spice of life. :slight_smile:

Life, like Tommy, is full of contradictions.

“Rethink your plan of action if it involved murder” Those dam CCTV cameras and GPS tracking devices are everywhere these days, so great advice thanks Tommy

:+1::+1::+1::+1: This would indeed spare this board a lot of nonsense.

Don’t walk in the street without facing traffic at all times

Damn straight. Learned this early on.

Ha! Some unfortunate people don’t get a second chance to learn that vital lesson. Ahhh!
Always be aware of your surroundings and watch the hell out for scooters, buses, taxis or pretty much anything motorized.

yes!

Indeed. But keep in mind that even in a one way street, no matter how narrow the alley, no matter the illogical move… someone will spring at you from the most unimaginable place.

Trust me, I have been run over 3 times.