Until 2 weeks ago my Taiwanese gf and I had a young foreigner “D”, aged 22, staying in my gf’s room as he was in a tight spot concerning housing. I didn’t really know him, only met him a couple of times previously, but my gf had met him several times over a 2 month period and apparently had a reasonable impression of the guy. To me he seemed like a nice person although inviting him to stay at our place with only 2 days notice seemed a bit fast to me, but what the heck… sometimes you just have to help one another.
“D” came to Taiwan in the middle of August to live in an apartment shared by a small number of Taiwanese university students who sought the possibility of having culture exchange with “an exciting guy from a different country” (I believe that was the way they expressed it). The contact was made on the internet and “D” expressed his interest in traveling and enthusiasm about being invited to Taiwan with such open arms by people he had only been in contact with for 2 weeks at that time.
The students agreed on housing “D” for one month and he was depending on the their help in the first weeks since he didn’t speak the language, but I think most of us have been there. “D” liked it a lot in Taiwan and why shouldn’t he, it’s a pretty fabulous place. I guess we can all agree on that. “D” asked the students if he could stay at their place for another month since he had found work as an English teacher. They agreed but now problems slowly started to arise.
“D” had a few issues with his boss and he openly criticized Taiwanese as not being worthy of trust. His conduct when at home at the students’ place didn’t really fit their idea about a fruitful culture exchange and as the initiating students’ sister was in acute need of housing this student decided to ask “D” to look for other accommodation. After all, they had housed “D” for two months now and originally his stay shouldn’t have been more than one month. Unfortunately “D” took the reason as a personal attack of some “backstabbing” Taiwanese and got very angry. He denied to return the house keys and a computer which he had borrowed. “D” demanded an apology from students as he didn’t believe the story about the sister. Two days after he left the apartment he went back to see if the sister had shown up. She wasn’t there hence “D” was now certain that they all lied to him in order to get rid of him.
Meanwhile “D” had moved into my place and on the first evening at hour place he used my gf’s computer to send a regular threat to the students that he would deal with those who lied and betrayed him in a certain way. Additionally “D” wanted some money from the students in order to relieve his stress. Money originally meant for paying of their common electricity-bill (“D” didn’t pay rent as he was a guest). The students freaked and their families freaked as well. The whole thing escalated as 3 of the students confronted him loudly in a nearby pub the following evening, demanding him to hand back keys and computer. One word took the next and it could have gone pretty bad but the students decided to withdraw empty-handed, surprised by “D’s” willingness to use a violent answer to their, as I think, just demands.
Now, “D” had lost his job and most of his “old friends” and a day later, my gf and I learned about the threat. My gf freaked out and expressed her disappointment with “D” and his way of expressing his raging anger concerning Taiwanese in public. In the following week I’d to act as a mediator between the two of them and I’ve to admit that something bad was bound to happen when suddenly “D” decided to move out after one week at my place to stay with another foreigner he’d met in Taiwan.
At present I’ve been with my girlfriend for nearly two years and I’ve never seen her this angry before. She was, and still is, really pissed at “D” for also breaking her trust and showing such displeasure with the Taiwanese who helped him with nearly everything the first two months he spent here. And let’s not forget the threat he made from our house. I made it clear to him that that last thing was totally unacceptable. One day after “D” moved out of our place my gf posted a message on a local Taiwanese discussion board telling the viewers about “D’s” doings and warning people against him. ‘D’ learned about the message and is constantly messaging my gf about her “false” behavior towards him. I’ve read these messages and there are a couple of hidden threats in there as well. It’s not the first time I see that sought of stuff but my girlfriend is very angry and frightened as well. Now she wants to take measures against “D” and seek the help of the foreign affairs police thus preventing “D” from reentering Taiwan.
“D” is currently in his home country dealing with some problems in his immediate family but he sincerely wishes to return to Taiwan in 1-2 weeks time in order to pursue a career in English teaching. He’s already got a few positions lined up.
I agree with my gf that “D’ has burned a lot of bridges by acting the way he did and not seeking a more peaceful solution to the problems between him and his former housemates. On the other hand I understand where much of his frustration comes from as I faced similar problems when I came here 2½ years ago. I just decided to solve them in a different manner.
I’d like to know if any of you’ve faced similar problems. Any sort of advice concerning tackling this situation would also be greatly appreciated.
