Yesterday as I was walking to work my eye cought this small concrete decoraticve seperator or was it to prevent people from parking there … anyways they just broke it up and moved it a feet or so, just for someone to park his small blue truck … mind you, it’s around a local gorvernment building … my feeling is that lot’s of people here just don’t respect any public or private property, people or whatever … they are so selfcentered … hupla, let’s break it up and move it a little, so ‘I’ can park my precious car … morons :s
The ‘me first, screw you’ attitude is very plain to see if you are one of us car drivers. Examples:
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[color=red]The U-turn.[/color] The U-turn can be performed at any time, regardless of the crazy box with three changing lights. The best example of the U-turn is often performed in front of a hospital. The driver simply wishes to go in exactly the opposite direction and will swing round at their hearts desire. I have seen elderly men on drips honked forcibly from the pedestrian crossing for daring to cross the road when smokey Joe and his family realize they are going the wrong way.
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[color=red]Parking in the outside lane.[/color] Well, the outside lane isn’t really for driving along, is it? It is just a handy place for me to stop my car so I can pop in to 7-11, or the bank. I once saw a woman hold up two lanes of traffic on Gong-yi Road in Taichung so she could get herself a coffee. Bless her.
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[color=red]The sneaky right turn on a red light.[/color] Once they have started to turn that corner the driver believes they are legally allowed to continue driving. There is also a common belief that if 1 car can go, then three should be able to get in the same space. I generally apply the ‘honk and swerve towards them’ tactic. Fight madness with insanity.
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[color=red]I’m parking here.[/color] As BP stated in his post, cones, blocakdes and tape have been placed there for your benefit. The govt. has put them there so you can park your car there. Just move whatever has been placed there and park your precious little motor. I once saw a truck drive through a section of road blocked off with cones. The driver just smashed straight through them. This then ‘legally’ cleared the way for everyone else to follow.
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[color=red]My toll-booth line is too long, I like the look of yours.[/color] Easy to understand how to perform this trick, hard to fathom why they can’t just wait. They are only rushing home to sit and watch TV.
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[color=red]The crawl.[/color] Where are we? I dunno. Lets just crawl along the road and take our time. Oh look, we need to turn left across three lanes of traffic. GO GO GO!
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[color=red]The taxi.[/color] *#!#! :help: :fume: FKKERS.
There is only on answer to all of the above. Pimp your ride, get some WuTang tunes (preferably 38 Chambers, Method man, or the RZA) and a phat bass bin, and just glide down the road in a state of bliss. Works for me. I love it when the old blue truck guy bends his ear a little closer to my car so he can hear Method Man screaming out, “Hey you get off my cloud, Hear me get raw with my southpaw style. Buddah, puffin on a fat blunt from Cuba!”
Sometimes cars (especially taxis) move my bike and other bikes out of their official parking spaces (specifically marked for bikes) and park there. My bike could end up anywhere on the street. I found it in the middle of the road once, but usually it is parked on the opposite side of the road, pushed up against another bike, scratched, with its mirrors bent.
I hate this.
So out comes the chain. The offending vehicle gets locked to the nearest drain cover. If there is no drain cover, the wheels get locked to the car. If there are two offending cars, they get locked to each other.
I’ve even gone as far as taking a wheel off and leaving it on the roof.
I’ve had it with the disrespect shown to my property. Move and manhandle my vehicle, I move and manhandle yours. Simple.
OHHH could I rant all day about that one :fume: And let’s not forget the I need to be in front of you because I just need to. Lines? HHAHAHAHA for suckers.
[quote=“Dangermouse”]
So out comes the chain. The offending vehicle gets locked to the nearest drain cover. If there is no drain cover, the wheels get locked to the car. If there are two offending cars, they get locked to each other.
I’ve even gone as far as taking a wheel off and leaving it on the roof.
I’ve had it with the disrespect shown to my property. Move and manhandle my vehicle, I move and manhandle yours. Simple.[/quote]
:bravo: I hate when this happens, too.
I would love to see the face of the offending car driver when he or she returns to find that this has happened.
[quote=“Dangermouse”]Sometimes cars (especially taxis) move my bike and other bikes out of their official parking spaces (specifically marked for bikes) and park there. My bike could end up anywhere on the street. I found it in the middle of the road once, but usually it is parked on the opposite side of the road, pushed up against another bike, scratched, with its mirrors bent.
I hate this.
So out comes the chain. The offending vehicle gets locked to the nearest drain cover. If there is no drain cover, the wheels get locked to the car. If there are two offending cars, they get locked to each other.
I’ve even gone as far as taking a wheel off and leaving it on the roof.
I’ve had it with the disrespect shown to my property. Move and manhandle my vehicle, I move and manhandle yours. Simple.[/quote]
Brilliant, absolutely brilliant!! 
:bravo: :bravo:
[quote=“stan”][quote=“Dangermouse”]Sometimes cars (especially taxis) move my bike and other bikes out of their official parking spaces (specifically marked for bikes) and park there. My bike could end up anywhere on the street. I found it in the middle of the road once, but usually it is parked on the opposite side of the road, pushed up against another bike, scratched, with its mirrors bent.
I hate this.
So out comes the chain. The offending vehicle gets locked to the nearest drain cover. If there is no drain cover, the wheels get locked to the car. If there are two offending cars, they get locked to each other.
I’ve even gone as far as taking a wheel off and leaving it on the roof.
I’ve had it with the disrespect shown to my property. Move and manhandle my vehicle, I move and manhandle yours. Simple.[/quote]
Brilliant, absolutely brilliant!! :bravo: :bravo:[/quote]
But what if the offending car has since left and another car parked in its space? 
My pet hate is claiming public parking spots as your own or painting red lines outside your house to deter people from parking there. :fume:
I have ordered 1500 yellow stickers that read in Chinese and English
“I drive/park like an asshole because I am more important than you”
When they get here I am going to carry them around in my backpack and post it on the bumpers. They are the super sticky kind that will require serious work to get off.
Got the idea from a website called I park like an asshole.
I can’t wait
[quote=“shifty”]I have ordered 1500 yellow stickers that read in Chinese and English
“I drive/park like an asshole because I am more important than you”
When they get here I am going to carry them around in my backpack and post it on the bumpers. They are the super sticky kind that will require serious work to get off.
Got the idea from a website called I park like an asshole.
I can’t wait[/quote]
In order for that to be really effective, I suggest carrying a bottle of windex or other suitable cleaner around with you so you can make sure the surface you apply those stickers to will be perfectly clean. It’s much easier to pull a sticker off of a dirty surface. 
Story: I once rented a spiffy new four-door Mitsubishi to take the wife and friends down to Kenting for Spring Scream. I was drumming in a band, too. It promised to be a great time.
And it was, except for what happened to the car.
The block between our building and the main street was a relatively nice square, surrounded on all sides by smaller streets. The square had a fountain and bushes and flowers. There were cobblestone walkways too, which traversed the square at various angles and met the street. What always bugged me was that people living in the neighbouring villas would park their cars on the cobblestone walkways. It really bugged me.
So the night before we were to leave I got the car from the rental agency, drove it back to the apartment, and saw, as per usual, that at one corner of the square there were two cars parked on the cobblestone, leaving a nice parking spot at the side of the road. Which, were I to park there, would hem them in overnight.
So I did that. In spite. When I came out the next morning I saw that one of the cars had managed to get out (don’t ask me how), and that somebody had run his car keys all along the Mitsubishi I had rented.
Keyed! Damn! We went to Kenting, had a blast, and upon returning the car I was informed that I would have to pay the rental agency 10,000 NT for damages. I was miffed. I refused. Eventually I relented, though, as friends made sure to tell me that the guy running the agency was “connected.”
Another thing about that nice villa area was that I would often wake up to see nice new parked cars on blocks, their wheels missing. It seemed really common. I’m glad I never bought a car in Taiwan!
Same problem outside my former school. There are no sidewalks, just enough room for cars to drive in two lanes, but people park right there in the middle of the lane.
[quote]So the night before we were to leave I got the car from the rental agency, drove it back to the apartment, and saw, as per usual, that at one corner of the square there were two cars parked on the cobblestone, leaving a nice parking spot at the side of the road. Which, were I to park there, would hem them in overnight.
So I did that. In spite.[/quote]
Now see, that’s pretty bad. The difference between what you did and what they did is that they weren’t considering how other people would be inconvenienced (they were inconsiderate), but you considered it and then intentionally did something to cause them trouble (you were mean).
Inconsiderate is bad. Mean is worse.
[quote]When I came out the next morning I saw that one of the cars had managed to get out (don’t ask me how), and that somebody had run his car keys all along the Mitsubishi I had rented.
Keyed![/quote]
So, you paid for your unkindness. Moral of the story: two wrongs don’t make a right.
[quote=“puiwaihin”]
So, you paid for your unkindness. Moral of the story: two wrongs don’t make a right.[/quote]
In Taiwan it does … to wrong turns make a right … 
[quote=“belgian pie”][quote=“puiwaihin”]
So, you paid for your unkindness. Moral of the story: two wrongs don’t make a right.[/quote]
In Taiwan it does … to wrong turns make a right … [/quote]
I clearly don’t understand Taiwanese culture.
Morals don’t exist in taiwan.
[quote]Quote:
So, you paid for your unkindness. Moral of the story: two wrongs don’t make a right.
Morals don’t exist in taiwan.[/quote]
True. But it makes for better stories.
I was at a carwash waiting to have my car washed and I saw a bunch of people standing around black Benz. I think it was an E type. Anyway, the bastard (it seems that politeness and the cost of the car are inversely proportional in Taiwan) had parked blocking off the exit of a dorm. Someone had taken a white paint pen and written a paragraph on the hood in very nice caligraphy, in very formal Chinese (everyone was commenting about how nice the penmanship and wording was) to the effect of;
“Do you realize with your thoughtless parking how many people’s lives you’ve inconvenienced? This is a clearly marked entranceway yet you still parked in front of so noone could get thier scooters out. Why were you so thoughtless? Please take this as a reminder to park more responsibly next time. Regards John Q Public”
I’d like to have a Chinese of this one.
[quote=“Elegua”]I was at a carwash waiting to have my car washed and I saw a bunch of people standing around black Benz. I think it was an E type. Anyway, the bastard (it seems that politeness and the cost of the car are inversely proportional in Taiwan) had parked blocking off the exit of a dorm. Someone had taken a white paint pen and written a paragraph on the hood in very nice caligraphy, in very formal Chinese (everyone was commenting about how nice the penmanship and wording was) to the effect of;
“Do you realize with your thoughtless parking how many people’s lives you’ve inconvenienced? This is a clearly marked entranceway yet you still parked in front of so noone could get thier scooters out. Why were you so thoughtless? Please take this as a reminder to park more responsibly next time. Regards John Q Public”[/quote]
Did this really happen? If it did, I just wet my pants. Seriously.
Yes it did. According to the carwash guy the hood needed to be repainted. What I thought was funny was how people were commenting on how well the characters were written - as if that made it OK becuase it was done so well.