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How about we start a 'dumbest thing you’ve seen people do in a bar/club ’ thread. Could be interesting.
Had a woman who ate half her steak then told me she was only going to pay half price for it because she was full. After I politely laughed at her and said impossible, she then said 'OK, then you give me discount!".
ME-‘Um, no, how about you pay full price for it and I’ll let you take the rest home!’
HER- Xiao Chi Gui! (Tightass/cheapskate)
ME-
The dumbest thing I ever said in a bar was about 10 years ago in some raging girls swinging in cages bar in Taipei. I saw a HUGE black guy, who was obviously a basketball player in Taiwan (the club was full of them, BBall players that is). I was in a good mood and approached him and said, “So where do YOU teach English?” He looked down at me (he was about 6’10" and said in a deep voice that rumbled through my bones), “ENGLISH??”
It was so funny at the time.
Again, once in the PIG in Taichung a baseball team was there partying and I walked up to a foreign guy with biceps the size of my head and said, “So what team are you on?” He yelled across the floor, “Hey, WHO do we play for?” to his teammates?
I spit my beer on his shoes laughing.
Nice guys though, both of them. Neither kicked my scrawny ass.
Had a customer call the police as her hand bag was stolen. She had her bag over her shoulder and even when I pointed this out she yelled we were theives. The police came & after talking to them they took her home. “What else can we do they said” The Londoner
I once had a near miss in a dark bar just off Chunghsiao East Rd Section 4. I had to push my way through a group of guys to get to the bar (to be truthful: to the far end of the bar where the cute bargirl was stationed). No matter how many “duibuqi’s” I said, it seemd they didn’t want to let me pass. Lucky for me, I had height and weight on my side, so it only took a slight effort to get to my desired destination. I received plenty of glares and so, returned a smile before picking up a handful of drinks and starting to walk/stagger back through the group of guys and towards my mates on the other side.
The place was dark, I was a little tipsy, and the 1st group of guys were all wearing black. In case you didn’t know it, these guys were mafia, for sure. As luck would have it, I stepped on the 1st guy’s toes and then tripped over the 2nd, only to crash into the 3rd, who was standing behind them, and whom they were supposedly protecting (the “Da Ge”). I offered some sort of apology (something like “maybe it would be safer if you were dancing on the dance floor”) before heading back towards my friends, oblivious to the potential terror that I had just started.
Lucky for me, there was no immediate problem, but I played it safe by steering clear of that place for a while after.
A sports fan promised that if his team won he would strip off his clothes, put a 1NT coin in his mouth, and ride down Wufu road in all of his glory. He used the 1 NT to call us from Montana’s pub.
have seen a few but THE dumbest had to be Halloween when “Bob” dressed up as “Mr. Shitty Arse” in an attempt to win a trip to the Islands. He wrapped himself, head to toe, in toilet paper, leaving gaps only for his eyes and mouth. After copious amounts of lager(consumed through a straw), he decided to smoke a cigar. At this stage the hand/eye cordination was a bit circumspect, and he promptly set fire to the toilet paper on his head! Mr. Shitty Arse one minute, The Human Torch the next.
I managed to extinguish him by puting my thumb over a soda gun and hosing him down from about 15 feet!! Suffice to say , he didn’t win the trip…
While the facts of the above are accurate, names and places have been altered to protect the identity of THAT PLONKER!
I haev to say, in Taipei the most ridiculous things I’ve seen have all been done by the owner or wait staff, not the customers. Things like actually expecting payment for food that came complete with cockroaches; panic attacks when expected to deal with a white person ordering from a bilingual menu with pictures; trying to cheat customers out of a few NT, thus losing repeat business; serving food that had gone bad; etc.
When I was in high school in Singapore, we had this girl named Maria in our class, total skank, used to pretend to get drunk all the time and act stupid. One night we fed her 7-Up all night, told her it was Vodka 7, went to the Hard Rock and within ten minutes she was dancing on the bar screaming “I am so drunk” and flashing everyone. It was great because we all knew the truth…
