How did my life go so wrong to end up living in Taiwan?
Today I had one of those moments where I thought “what the f*ck am I doing here in Taiwan jumping around like a monkey for 3GBP per hour”. Here’s some background:
Today I had to do a demo for some new students at my school. This is outside of my monthly contracted hours so I get a generous $NT300 per hour for this. They’re only small kids so I have to go in and jump around making animal noises and teaching “dog, cat” etc whilst the parents film me on their iphones, my boss gives me the evil eye signaling “more animal noises” and the kids look on confused by everything.
Afterwards I take the MRT home and sit opposite a complete family who are all talking about me in Chinese. The mother is encouraging them to look at me and saying things about the“外國人” of which I can understand every word that they say. However I was still too shy to strike up a conversation so I just took it like a man and stared at the floor.
In the afternoon I went to do a practice Chinese test in Tainan for $300 of book vouchers. It cost $150 for a local train return ticket. My experience with the test invigilator was a classic tale of Taiwanese ignorance. As one of only 4 non-asian people completing the test I was spoken to entirely in English. I watched as the Vietnamese and Indonesian people in front of me were directed to their seats and the toilet in Chinese. Yet when I reached the front of the line it was straight in their with the English.
After the test I took the train back to Kaohsiung during which I looked out of the window and was amazed at how old, broken and generally shit everything looked. I hadn’t noticed this before.
Surely it wasn’t supposed to be like this? I graduated from a good Uni near the top of my class with a first-class honours degree whilst also studying extra credit modules in Spanish language and mentoring. I have a CV full of work experience and responsibilities that many other graduates could only dream of. I have a good family and come from a strong and developed country. And yet I have thrown it all away with one year in Taiwan making monkey noises for pennies.
Oh yeah – got married last weekend in Hong Kong – congratulations to me.
It sounds like you’re having second thoughts about marriage. Too late to do anything about that though. Hope you can work through this momentary lapse of pessimism.
Ah another thread on the meaning of life? Whats in your CV can you let us know? Nothing wrong with being a pet monkey in the zoo. Living in Tainan or Kaohsiung I wouldnt really relish that at all. NT$300 an hour why did you even bother turning up? Why not just stay in Hong Kong?
With the ‘straight into Chinese thing’ - just chalk it up to racism and reply to them in Chinese. Or speak Chinese before they speak. Or you can just reply in your native accent (this is even better if you’re not from London) and watch them struggle before changing to Chinese.
It pisses me off when they speak English to the white girl too, even more so because they can’t usually understand my accent and therefore the whole thing takes ten times as slow.
Congratulations on your marriage!
And you know what - you sound like a clever bloke. Use that initiative. If you can’t find the job you want, CREATE the job you want.
One year in Taiwan isn’t throwing anything away. You can return to your home country and pick up where you left off. If you don’t like being a dancing monkey, don’t be one.
I think good advice.
Some people say you from England.
I think good idea go back quick because soon not have job in England any more.
And more and more England people come Taiwan play monkey.
NT$ 300 one hour good pay for monkey.
Living in taiwan is like being married to not quite the perfect girl. First the general elation - plus la change, then the gloom, then you find a path to work it out. That or get divorced.
Sounds like you got yourself a big stage two. The first few weeks of elation at something different, loving everything and now the harsh reality starts to set in and the things that bug you bug u more.
Its ok to say, one year is enough and get the hell outa dodge city. Don’t go to a gunfight in Ok Corral with only a knife, you know what I mean. If you aint equipped to fight the fight you had better take a hike.
As others have said, you’ve thrown nothing away. Your CV is the same as it ever was, there’s no boat that you’ve missed. Now if you were to make monkey noises for ten years, that might be a little different.
Indeed.
One would think that someone near the top of their class would have figured that out already. But perhaps they were just a clone on that score.
And if you’ve learned enough Chinese in that year to be pissed off at people speaking English to you, you can hardly write it off as a waste of time. Everyone goes through this I am sure.
Shit, 13 years now. I am never getting out of the zoo.
3 GBP an hour is 150NT.
Why are you working for only 150NT?
Get a grip. man! Top of your class at university and you can’t even pull in the average wage? There’s something wrong there, mate. I don’t know about university these days, but I heard it’s got easier - but I didn’t think it would be all colouring in and playing with Duplo like in primary school though.
If you can travel to almost the furthest country possible from your home country, learn Chinese to the point that you can tackle random conversations between other people on the train and generally exist in a completely foreign land, then you can certainly do much better for yourself than you appear to be doing now. If you’ve wasted a year, then it’s your own doing and you should have been smart enough to sort that out.
What you need to do is to go down to the river with a friend, or even just a random guy off the street, pick yourself up the fattest carp you can find, and then get whoever you bought with you to hit you around the face with it for as many times as necessary until you wake up and gather some sense.
It works for me.
I don’t mean to appear harsh, but all this lovey-dovey, sympathy yuk from other posters will do you no favours. You know where I’m coming from. As for the year you think you have wasted - try looking at it from a different perspective, and use the time now - what you think is a low point - to gather your thoughts and concentrate on what you really want to achieve in life. When you’re having fun, it is easy to forget about the future and what want and where you want to be, but when you are in a rut, plans can come together in no time, if you can get past the initial lethargy and procrastination.
Now’s a great time to plan ahead.
Chin up, pal, I’m off to bed.
I think the guy is just having a bit of seasonal depression and feeling introspective. Never make a major life-changing decision in winter you have to live with through summer.
Is this a good time for me to say that I actually like this place?
I think the key is to find your raison d’etre.
Of course, that takes time, and I’m speaking as a middle-aged dude that went through all that angst in the Middle East (and, I’d like to be back there, believe it or not).
I guarantee you that you’ll eventually regret bailing on this country.
Milkybar_Kid, seems like your having a moment I had not too recently. I guess it could be something in the water here in Kaohsiung that is driving us over the edge? I feel for you…
Pfft, your post sounds a bit silly. Honestly, not to be a bit childish - but you sound just like I imagine Eeyore would from Winnie the Pooh. “Oh, whoa is me. I’ve lost my tail.”
First of all, you just got married. If the world is looking dark and worthless, then obviously you aren’t experiencing that newly wed feeling and there’s something a tad bit wrong.
You’re living in a foreign country having experiences 90% of the world will never have, and wish they could - and you want to complain the people across from you are speaking about you in Chinese? So what? Did it hurt you somehow? Are you offended?
You feel bad that you’re playing monkey for a group of children that won’t understand. Why not have fun with it? Honestly - you’re making an ass out of yourself either way - we all know that, all of us who teach do that. Have you happened to notice that children tend to LIKE when you make an ass out of yourself? Why not have fun with it? Why make it into a humdrum situation when you can take it for the freedom it is? When was the last time you got to imitate a dog without looking like a psycho? Are you afraid you won’t look like a DIGNIFIED dog while barking for the children?
Come on now. Enjoy it or don’t - but don’t act like the world is crashing down around you because you happened to lose your tail. Find it and enjoy yourself in a situation that is unlikely to change - or move somewhere else and pretend it never happened.
I never expected Taiwan to be like this when I moved here - but what’s the point in bitching and moaning about it? Sometimes it’s nice to do so to let off steam… but to condemn it all as a waste of time? Obviously you’re not trying hard enough to make it WORTH your time.
I feel for you…