Brilliant thread - so in Taiwan there appear to be 2 (yes count them) available single women worth dating! Except maybe not because one of them was tagged by her “straight” teacher and isn’t allowed to date anyone who wants sex.
Taiwan much like many other countries has a broad range of people in it. Culture dictates that the majority dress and act a certain way but there are ALWAYS exceptions. I’m sorry that there aren’t bars like there are in Tokyo where you can go and find girls who want to date white/black/tangerine coloured guys but hey there is always Wednesday night at Carnegies.
I’m sure the 2 ladies tagged above are AWESOME and some of the posters may even be too. You may or may not end up with a local, perhaps you will find the Aussie/Merican/Saffie girl of your dreams whilst you are in Taiwan.
My advice is to relax and enjoy, take each new person as an individual and try to learn about their culture/identity/freakiness/whatever
More mature - Probably, because of cultural differences.
Better informed - Not necessarily. Hard to gauge when you don’t speak fluent Mandarin, or they don’t speak fluent English (not conversational - Fluent, near native speaker ability).
Too thin - I feel your pain. I like an ampler women myself.
Quoted for truth.
Do tell.[/quote]
That’s best done over a beer sometime. Suffice to say, I’ve met some odd “mature” women (here and elsewhere). Really depends on the individual.
[quote]Better informed - Not necessarily. Hard to gauge when you don’t speak fluent Mandarin, or they don’t speak fluent English (not conversational - Fluent, near native speaker ability).[/quote] You guys give good advice and have good insight but on this one …No, the girls I met in Europe were not native speakers of English either. In my time here and I like Taiwan it is not hard to see just like middle America people are not as well informed. It’s not hard to see. When I mention Mexican Americans and the shopping girl thinks they are all illegal? Because of the TV shows, news and school system it’s just a fact. And of course I don’t mean everyone. But not my main focus anyway.
From a girl’s perspective, I think the war between the sexes is quite an unresolved issue here. I was always perplexed at the kind of silly games and manipulations my roomies put their boyfriends though. When I asked: why?, they said they had to show them who was in command of the relationship early on, or else they would end with the short end of the stick. The Hello Kitty cutie stage, as per their words, as just a smokescreen. After the guy was hooked, then the kitty turns into a tigress.
Me thinks that given the amount of women I know who end up losing their kids and everything else after divorce, no wonder they see love as a battlefield.
That said, I have two friends, one very beautiful and witty and funny, divorced with kids but economically independent, another one smart, pretty, currently single but overworked, both available, looking for great, mature guys who like to enjoy life, no silly games, no tricks, just plain truth as it is.
Filial piety is very strong in most asian countries. Most asian people are very, very close to their family in comparison to that in western cultures. Heck, we even bathe each other and that’s normal.
I am guilty of doing this - calling every hour to tell my mom where I am. Or sometimes, I just use this as an excuse to get out of a date. If the date is boring, or the guy is a little too pushy, I call my mom. If she was really in to you, she could have insisted in going pass 11 pm. Sometimes, I just say a certain time so that if the date isn’t that great, I can say I need to get home by 10 or 11. This could be a possibility. But you seem like a great guy, so it might be something else.
Most western people love to shop and eat also. It’s a normal girl activity. Very normal.
Have we dated before? I got a hello kitty cellphone cover and I decked my car in…
Find a hobby, let’s say you like baseball. Find your girl in a baseball game that way you’re sure that you both have something in common. If you find a girl in the mall, you should expect that she loves shopping. So look in the places that you like and you’ll find a girl who shares your interest.
[quote=“cyreneq”]
Filial piety is very strong in most Asian countries. Most Asian people are very, very close to their family in comparison to that in western cultures. Heck, we even bathe each other and that’s normal. [/quote]
Not so normal here - most people don’t bathe together! A lot of Taiwanese girls even feel embarrassed going to a naked hot spring or seeing other girls get changed in front of them. It took a while for me to adjust to, since I used to live in Japan.
Most western people love to shop and eat also. It’s a normal girl activity. Very normal. [/quote]
Yes, but most girls have hobbies and things to talk about outside of shop/eat/shop. A very select few enjoy just shopping and eating (my stepmom’s one, it drives me crazy!). The amount of girls here who’s main hobby can be listed as ‘shopping’ is ASTOUNDING. And it doesn’t make for good conversation fodder.
That depends entirely on what you mean by close. If you mean in the emotional sense then no, as most Asians are incapable of expressing deep emotions with each other. If you mean close in the sense of proximity well, no to that too. I know of very few Asian fathers, for example, who spend as much time with their kids as an average western father. Not surprising when many have children as a filial obligation as opposed to a genuine desire to raise a family.
The sad fact is that the Asian family model is based largely on guilt, coercion, and a Stockolm Syndrome like manipulation that leaves even grown children financially and emotionally dependent.
Not to be cynical but I think you’ll find that most westerners who live and marry into Asian, or at least Chinese societies, are pretty skeptical of the notion of extraordinary family closeness.
That’s true. I always think it’s terribly sad - I remember going with a friend’s family to Chinese New Year once, and the grandfather just couldn’t take his eyes of his kids (now adult and with children of their own). You could tell how much he loved them, yet he didn’t hug them or touch them, and it just seemed… sad.
The trend seems to be ‘smother your child until he starts school, and then never touch him again unless you’re beating him.’
Some other Taiwanese that post hear get on my case when I agree with these things, but I did LIVE and work/school abroad for several years. My dad came to my performancees and games and got criticized by my grandparents for skipping work and paying too much attention to nonsense like my sport. Oh, most of my realitives are close, yes like my cousin who is 30 married and pressured to get a home less than 30 mins from his mom even if much more $$$! My dad thinks education is important but so was showing up to support me and tell me when I did good things as well as bad. By 19 I could go out late (1am - 2, 3, 4) as long as I called home. Family thinks he’s not right.
If you find a girl in the mall expect that she loves shopping? Lots of girls go to the mall, but have a life besides shopping, I do? Sounds weird to me. Anyway I agree with the above except that I know some guys here foriegn and Taiwanese that like girls that are really, really into martial arts, scuba diving, jazz music, etc and not just killing time. They say this kind of girl is out there but it’s like trying to find a vegetarian at a steakhouse, possible but hard. Baseball is common enough it could work. keep trying.
Because of the TV shows, news and school system it’s just a fact. And of course I don’t mean everyone. But not my main focus anyway.
