If you only had a week left on Earth, and wanted to get it all off your chest… what would you say?
Heres what ChatGPT has to say on the matter:
To the Buxiban Owner:
I commend your efforts in establishing a buxiban that provides supplementary education to countless students across Taiwan. However, I feel compelled to address a crucial issue that significantly impacts both your dedicated teachers and the students you serve.
There is a growing concern that the pursuit of profit is overshadowing the essential aspects of education and the welfare of those involved. Prioritizing profit over the well-being of teachers and the educational benefits for students is not only ethically questionable but also a shortsighted approach that jeopardizes the long-term success of your institution.
Teachers are the cornerstone of any educational system. They travel thousands of miles from their homes, often making significant sacrifices to contribute to the educational landscape in Taiwan. When their well-being is compromised for the sake of profit margins, it not only affects their performance but also directly impacts the quality of education that students receive. Happy and motivated teachers are more effective, more creative, and more committed to the success of their students.
Moreover, students are the future of Taiwanese society. Their education should be the primary focus, as it directly influences the development of the nation. When educational quality is compromised to increase profit margins, it not only disadvantages the students but also undermines the very fabric of society. Ensuring that students receive the best possible education is an investment in the future – one that will yield substantial returns not just for them, but for the entire community, including your business.
It is crucial to recognize that a reputation for prioritizing profit over educational quality and teacher welfare can be detrimental to your buxiban in the long run. Parents, who are increasingly aware and discerning, will eventually turn to institutions that demonstrate a genuine commitment to education and the well-being of their staff. This shift can lead to a decline in enrollment and, ultimately, affect your business adversely.
To the Teachers:
Your dedication to educating the youth of Taiwan is commendable. Despite the challenges, your passion for teaching and your resilience continue to inspire and shape the future of your students. It is essential to continue advocating for a supportive and nurturing environment, where the primary focus is on delivering quality education and ensuring the welfare of both teachers and students.
A Call to Action:
It is time to re-evaluate the priorities and align them with the core values of education. By investing in the well-being of your teachers and prioritizing the educational outcomes of your students, you are not just running a successful business; you are contributing to the growth and development of Taiwanese society.
Creating a sustainable model where profit and educational excellence go hand in hand is not only possible but imperative. This approach will ensure the long-term success of your buxiban, foster a positive reputation, and most importantly, contribute to a brighter future for the students and the community at large.
Thank you for your attention to this critical matter. I believe that with a shared vision and a commitment to holistic development, we can create an environment that benefits everyone involved.
With deepest respect and hope for positive change.
That’s really not bad
That is truly brilliant. Straight from the Emerald City, no less.
I was expecting this thread to be shunned.
May I ask how long the prompt you used was?
I feel it gives an excellent overview, but doesn’t get granular and bullet pointed about how they are screwing up.
I think the main issues are
- Meddling, incompetent, sky dragon parents.
- Meddling, incompetent sky dragon bosses.
- Teachers are not allowed to discipline kids, meaning 1 or 2 bad students can ruin a class.
- Profound cultural disrespect for teachers and students.
- Outdated materials.
- A written test from the MOE, which leaves kids poorly prepared for speaking.
- Complete unwillingness to ask either foreign, or local teachers to prepare a better syllabus.
Did I miss anything?
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CoPilot gave me this after I asked it to write in the style of Confederacy of Dunces…(I edited it a little)
like a tattered scroll in a hurricane
To The Effete and Impudent snobs:
I pen this missive with the nail scratch of a thousand chalkboards. The bourgeoisie buxiban owners of Taiwan, insipid overlords of the educational underworld, have provoked our ire. Gather 'round, downtrodden of the Taipei underworld, as we unfurl our grievances…
- Meddling, Incompetent Sky Dragon Parents: These harpies of perpetual dissatisfaction, flutter about our hallowed halls. Their talons clutch report cards. “Why does my precious Xiao Ming not speak like a BBC newsreader?” “Why does he not conjugate irregular verbs in his sleep?” Alas, their offspring’s linguistic prowess is inversely proportional to their own meddling.
- Meddling, Incompetent Sky Dragon Bosses: Behold the buxiban proprietors, their eyes gleaming with the promise of profit margins and PowerPoint presentations. Their decrees echoing through fluorescent-lit corridors: “More phonics! More flashcards! More—FUN!” They’ve never conjugated a verb, but they’ll tell you how to teach it. Their souls are QR codes.
- Discipline? Ha! Teachers, are shackled by invisible chains. The spawn of Beitou disrupt classes, while we, the bubble-tea martyrs, can only offer lukewarm stern glances. “No, little Zhou Wei, you may not set fire to your workbook.” But who listens? One bad apple spoils the bunch, and suddenly, our classroom resembles a mosh pit at a punk concert. Discipline? It’s a relic.
- Cultural Disrespect: Confucian ghosts weep. Students bow to their smartphones, not their teachers. “Teacher,” they say, “why learn English when I can order mooncakes via app?” We’re but glorified Siri-Monkeys, dispensing language tidbits like fortune cookies.
- Materials Older Than Methuselah: Our textbooks predate the Big Bang. “Chapter 3: Communicating via Carrier Pigeon.” The pages crumble like ancient scrolls. “Teacher, why no TikTok lesson?” they lament. “Why no emoji conjugations?” Alas, we’re stuck with “The Quick Brown Fox Jumps Over the Lazy Dog.”
- MOE’s Written Test: A Kafkaesque Farce: Picture this: a room of trembling adolescents, pencils poised like dueling swords. The Ministry of Education’s written test descends—a Kafkaesque labyrinth of arcane grammar rules and irrelevant vocabulary. “Translate ‘photosynthesis’ into Mandarin,” it demands. Meanwhile, our students can’t order a sandwich at Subway. The irony drips like ink from a leaky pen.
- Unwillingness to Seek Wisdom: “Teacher,” I implore, “let us craft a syllabus that inspires, that ignites the flames of curiosity!” But no. The buxiban lords scoff, monocles fogging with disdain. “Foreign teachers? Local teachers? Bah! We have PowerPoint slides and a YouTube channel. What more do you need?” And so, we trudge through the wasteland of mediocrity, our dreams buried beneath a pile of photocopied worksheets.
In conclusion, dear reader, let us raise our red pens in solidarity. Let us chant, “Down with the bourgeoisie buxiban owners!” Let us reclaim our classrooms, our dignity, and our sanity.
A revolution brews in the hearts of the dispossessed.
Yours in exasperation,
Ignatius J Reilly 
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Yeah they sometimes which you to write them a syllabus that is not paid for.
Perhaps have a stricter policy on unruly behavior by actually refusing new enrollment for children that consistently disrupt the class
Reduce staff turn over but first employing more qualified and experienced teachers to manage the foreign staff while the Taiwanese boss puts more trust in the foreign manager.
Encourage some sort of career progression within your school.
For the private sector you are unlikely to attract high school qualified teachers , so at least start with those who have passed such tests such as CELTA, or Cambridge TKT.
Taiwanese staff should have a minimum TOEIC score and Taiwanese teachers a higher TOEIC score.
Have a feed back form every month where the Foreign teachers can assess staff and staff assess foreign teachers not just one way but two way.
Have a feed back for that every three months goes straight to the boss not the management and is signed by the boss as read and a copy returned.
Keep teachers up to date with some optional or paid teaching seminars on the latest teaching philosophies and techniques.
2 Likes
親愛的台北市的無禮和無禮的勢利小人…
你應該害怕三件事。
一、無月之夜。
二。暴風雨海上的帆船。
我將讓你自己找出第三個。谷歌是你的好朋友。
你以為你了解我，但其實你並不了解我。你以為你抓住我了……但我卻躲開了你。就像沙繩，或編織無面的風。
Qīn’ài de táiběi shì de wú lǐ hé wú lǐ de shìlì xiǎo rén…
Nǐ yīnggāi hàipà sān jiàn shì.
Yī, wú yuè zhī yè.
Èr. Bàofēngyǔ hǎishàng de fānchuán.
Wǒ jiāng ràng nǐ zìjǐ zhǎo chū dì sān gè. Gǔgē shì nǐ de hǎo péngyǒu.
Nǐ yǐwéi nǐ liǎojiě wǒ, dàn qíshí nǐ bìng bù liǎojiě wǒ. Nǐ yǐwéi nǐ zhuā zhù wǒle……dàn wǒ què duǒ kāile nǐ. Jiù xiàng shā shéng, huò biānzhī wú miàn de fēng.
That is all good, cheers. Maybe we should write a Magna Carta, but bigger.
The one way feedback thing is especially demeaning, I agree.
In Google, if you don’t like a boss, you can just walk off his station. Performance reports go both ways.
In Taipei, the local winner assesses the foreign monkey’s performance, yet give scarce thought to their own.
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The written test from the MOE leaves kids poorly prepared for anything! I doesn’t even give them a good sense of how to read normal English, let alone listen to understand, write, or speak normal English!
我是那個拖著腳步來到你們海岸的外國人。我是吹過忠孝地下的夜風。我是西門小丑的半笑。我是一個傻瓜，一個國王，一個乞丐。
他們稱我為乞丐王。
Wǒ shì nàgè tuōzhe jiǎobù lái dào nǐmen hǎi’àn de wàiguó rén. Wǒ shì chuīguò zhōngxiào dìxià de yè fēng. Wǒ shì xīmén xiǎochǒu de bàn xiào. Wǒ shì yīgè shǎguā, yīgè guówáng, yīgè qǐgài.
Tāmen chēng wǒ wèi qǐgài wáng.
Well, perhaps you could furnish us with some suggestions.
今天，我寫下這些文字的那天……那是一個涼爽、無情的早晨……我在東南亞的一個秘密地點。
你在舒適的床上快樂嗎？你喜歡昨晚平淡無奇的電視表演嗎？你聽到紅樹林紅樹林沼澤上空的隆隆雷聲了嗎？
當你坐在那裡時…沾沾自喜，自我滿足，堅信自己的優越性。
一場風暴正在醞釀。
Jīntiān, wǒ xiě xià zhèxiē wénzì dì nèitiān……nà shì yīgè liángshuǎng, wúqíng de zǎochén……wǒ zài dōngnányà de yīgè mìmì dìdiǎn.
Nǐ zài shūshì de chuángshàng kuàilè ma? Nǐ xǐhuān zuó wǎn píngdàn wú qí de diànshì biǎoyǎn ma? Nǐ tīngdào hóng shùlín hóng shùlín zhǎozé shàngkōng de lónglóng léi shēngle ma?
Dāng nǐ zuò zài nàlǐ shí…zhānzhānzìxǐ, zìwǒ mǎnzú, jiānxìn zìjǐ de yōuyuè xìng.
Yīchǎng fēngbào zhèngzài yùnniàng.
Exactly right. Maybe this would help reduce the psycho 小姐 stuff.
I mean, my suggestions are all over this site. To be clear, I’ve only worked in “real schools”, so my buxiban understanding is only what I’ve heard from others.
But I will shout into the abyss until anyone actually hears me:
proficiency assessments must be based on proficiency.
That means “what can you do with the language?”
Can you tell me about your family? How in depth can you go? Or do you just say “I have mom, dad, 2 sister, one brother 還有 dog-gah”?
Can you tell me about what you did this morning? If so, is it in the correct tense? If it’s not in the correct tense, could you talk at length about you did anyway?
And there are really cheap (much cheaper than the utter and total garbage that the MOE/NTNU/idk what other morons have created) that assess these things. They give clear standards for proficiency instead of “you didn’t use this grammar point exactly as we the test makers demanded of you, even though fifteen native speakers said they’d never use it like that”. They give feedback about what someone can do to get to the next level. They are effective means of assessment, unlike 100% of all tests Taiwan pushes on people (yeah, even those things that are “internationally recognized”). But no one wants to pay for them. Even though they’re like US$13/test
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羅馬尼亞的尼古拉·西塞索預見了自己的垮台嗎？凱撒是否夢見了玷污他帝國的刀子？老鼠感知到飢餓的黑貓的爪子了嗎？
同樣……你沒有意識到這種情況的美妙諷刺。
用西洋棋術語來說，你處於祖格旺。
台北的勢利小人，你們已經設計了自己的垮台。
Luómǎníyǎ de ní gǔ lā·xī sāi suǒ yùjiànle zìjǐ de kuǎtái ma? Kǎisǎ shìfǒu mèngjiànle diànwū tā dìguó de dāozi? Lǎoshǔ gǎnzhī dào jī’è de hēi māo de zhuǎzile ma?
Tóngyàng……nǐ méiyǒu yìshí dào zhè zhǒng qíngkuàng dì měimiào fèngcì.
Yòng xīyáng qí shùyǔ lái shuō, nǐ chǔyú zǔ gé wàng.
Táiběi de shìlì xiǎo rén, nǐmen yǐjīng shèjìle zìjǐ de kuǎtái.
Yes there are tests that are pretty decent. Employers should offer to pay their teachers to do them. That doesn’t mean those tests are great but at least it’s part of career development and shows that the employer is more serious about career development.
Well, please… allow me to run around compiling them for you.
你們和你們聲稱鄙視的精英一樣腐敗。笑。
Nǐmen hé nǐmen shēngchēng bǐshì de jīngyīng yīyàng fǔbài. Xiào.
Have they figured out that their another-loser-out, another-loser-in mentality hurts them badly?
I remember pre-COVID, they were getting pretty cocky.
Not sure if the virus has changed anything.
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Here we see part of the problem.
They are busy reinventing the wheel on taxpayer money.
Jobs for the boys.
Suggestions need to be proactive and bullet pointed.
Only then will the wind carry your words.
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我在此呼籲立即逮捕所有教育部工作人員。他們是如何找到工作的？我懇求英國菜聽聽看。台北的孩子們被拖過流沙沼澤。他們的左手被無能所束縛，而他們的右手則被中產階級的自負所束縛。
一百五十年前，加拿大的喬治‧麥凱來到了你們荒涼而權杖森嚴的小島。因為他有錢，你就爬向他。低三下四。鞠躬。阿諛奉承。
當一個沒有錢的外國人到來？
你對待它們就像對待鞋子上的葉子一樣。
關於台北的天龍，這告訴我們什麼？
Wǒ zài cǐ hūyù lìjí dàibǔ suǒyǒu jiàoyù bù gōngzuò rényuán. Tāmen shì rúhé zhǎodào gōngzuò de? Wǒ kěnqiú yīngguó cài tīng tīng kàn. Táiběi de háizimen bèi tuōguò liúshā zhǎozé. Tāmen de zuǒshǒu bèi wúnéng suǒ shùfù, ér tāmen de yòushǒu zé bèi zhōngchǎn jiējí de zìfù suǒ shùfù.
Yībǎi wǔshí nián qián, jiānádà de qiáozhì‧mài kǎi lái dàole nǐmen huāngliáng ér quán zhàng sēnyán de xiǎodǎo. Yīnwèi tā yǒu qián, nǐ jiù pá xiàng tā. Dīsānxiàsì. Jūgōng. Ēyú fèngchéng.
Dāng yīgè méiyǒu qián de wàiguó rén dàolái?
Nǐ duìdài tāmen jiù xiàng duìdài xiézi shàng de yèzi yīyàng.
Guānyú táiběi de tiānlóng, zhè gàosù wǒmen shénme?