I am a 24 year old young professional (Chinese American) who just moved to Taipei for a job with Acer and I met a girl working as a clerk while I was getting a new cellphone plan from a store. She told me she could show me around Taipei (a thinly disguised date…). So I went along. No money spent. I asked her out on 2 more dates with her. It’s been 1 month now.
On the third date, she claimed that she worked as a KTV 小姐 and she had already left it for quite some time. She’s a nursing student and a PT clerk. She has shown me her coursework, transcript, textbooks, etc.
I haven’t really gone out with her since then, since I don’t know what to make of the whole thing. Right now, I am just taking it cautiously. She said she wanted to be honest with me and asked if she was already my girlfriend and if I could give her a chance to prove that she is trustworthy. I gave a noncommittal answer and told her something like we’ll see what happens as time goes by. I just try to play it cool and tread carefully.
Anyway, she still calls me everyday. Not long after meeting her, she offered to make me 便當 everyday for work, help me with buying groceries from traditional markets, getting documents in order at gov’t offices, and even started telling me to stay in Taiwan instead of going back to my home country. I have also been gifted with chocolate, and bags of fruit…
IN ANY CASE, her former KTV 小姐 background makes me VERY APPREHENSIVE. I mean, it creates all sort of crazy images in my mind. I have never been inside one, but I have heard all sorts of dark, crazy tales. What are your experiences? I mean are they prostitutes, connected to organized crime, etc.?
KTV hostesses are paid to have drinks with customers and keep them company. It depends on the establishment, but what goes on beyond that is usually up to the girls themselves. Some take things further for extra money on the side, and many don’t.
I’ve known a few woman who put themselves through school working as hostesses, and they didn’t sleep with customers. They were perfectly normal and worked as hostesses because the money is relatively good and the hours are flexible, so it fit in well with their school schedules.
I wouldn’t assume that the girl you’re dating necessarily got into anything shady, although I suppose it is a possibility. If you like her and she likes you (it sounds like she likes you a lot), I say give things a chance.
It sounds like KTVs are a complicated situation since the circumstances seem to differ quite a bit. I was told by her that there are KTVs that split girls into different categories. Some are just regular hostesses; others do strip shows; there are also others who do extras. I guess maybe one group doesn’t do striptease and I suppose unavailable for “special services”?, while pink dresses mean they strip naked and probably can be taken out for hanky panky.
But maybe one thing I can say is that the girls who have worked in these environments become more bold with guys i.e. they might make the first move?
From your description, she’s investing a lot of time and effort into hanging out with you. If she just wanted a boyfriend to pay for her stuff, she probably wouldn’t need this kind of effort into doing things for you, there are be plenty of fools who’d dive nose first into a hot meimei.
I’d say go for it, stay vigilant but she seems to be into you, which means you’ll soon be INTO her. Eh? EHHH?
We went to a night market in Taipei and I paid for grilled squid and 胡椒餅 for the 2 of us. In fact, her gifts have probably cost more than the amount I spent for the date LOL…
but she seems to be into you, which means you’ll soon be INTO her.
I didn’t expect her to be this forward with me.
I am afraid that I am slowly succumbing to her charms and her smokin’ hot body and face!
BTW I didn’t ask this on Reddit since I would probably be the victim of nasty trolling. on Reddit, I probably would have been told to stop dating a skank who will drain your bank account.
Personally, I’d be more worried about the bian dang stuff than the ex-KTV job. You’ve seen each other casually a few times and she’s already cooking your meals for you? Sorry, but that’s just WEIRD.
As Dr Milker said, very few KTV hostesses actually “do anything”, beyond keeping the guests company and singing. They really are just eye candy; it’s easy money that doesn’t involve anything untoward unless (a) the girl makes her own private arrangements or (b) it’s “that kind of KTV”.
Honestly, I don’t see any point in “taking it slow”. The best possible outcome is that you’ll miss out on some sex, and the worst possible outcome is that she’ll go off the boil and look for someone who shows some interest. If you like each other, go for it and see what happens. Just make sure you have an exit strategy if it all turns to shit.
First of all, there is a huge difference between KTVs. Many of them they don’t even touch the customer or maybe an occasional tap on the leg or something. Others have more intimate services. And then inside KTVs that special services there are girls who offer no services.
The first thing I would do is try to find the approximate location or type or name of the K TV that she was working in.
And besides, there are good and bad girls in every profession.
I’ve been to some, just as mentioned most they usually do is your touch your knee or whatever.
Some of the dodgier ones will try to get your number for compensated dating but fairly rare.
A lot of them are just students .
No big deal.
Who cares about her former profession? Quit being so judgmental. If you like her, go for it. There’s plenty of women who never set foot inside a KTV who are way more skanky.
And sometimes that’s the best type.
of course, if you really want her to be a virgin, then you"d probably best walk away. But you’re gonna have to walk away from a lot of women that way… unless you like schoolgirls. And even then …
I knew a guy who once dated a girl, who a week into the relationship, started bringing him food. Maybe there is also a misunderstanding here. I think the girl in my case must be after a very serious relationship.
very few KTV hostesses actually “do anything”
it’s “that kind of KTV”
LOL aren’t KTV hostesses working in “that kind of KTV”? So wouldn’t some be tempted?
Honestly, I don’t see any point in “taking it slow”.
I haven’t asked her to be my girlfriend, but she already thinks of me as her boyfriend. She lays her head on my shoulders, always stares into my eyes, etc. We passionately kissed and she said “我愛你”
Yeah, maybe so, but she’s only just met you. She doesn’t know anything about you and she’s already decided you’re husband material. Hmmm. Bit over-enthusiastic is all I’m saying.
No, really. As mentioned back there, it would be worth finding out the name of that establishment if you’re worried.
And believe it or not, some women consider things other than money when deciding to sleep with someone.
I’m not you of course, but I’m 100% in agreement with this sentiment:
If you’re squeamish about this sort of thing, I’d move on, and let her move on. Otherwise, I’d just make a move. Stop dithering. Most women find ditherers inherently unattractive.
Do you mean that she might think I am just playing her?
Well, in her eyes, I am already her boyfriend. I am starting to succumb to her charms and smokin’ body and face. I hold her hand and put my arms around her. I open doors for her etc. I keep getting boners…lol
Hi hongbao,
IMO you should look at the bright side, she told you she was working in a KTV, she could have lied by omission. I would take it as a sign of honesty from her side.
Anyway, always very difficult to give online advice about this kind of stuff.
Good luck.
Other people have commented that KTV hostessing doesn’t imply sex a lot of the times and many of them don’t sleep with their customers. I suppose you agree as well?
I’ve been in Taiwan for over 3.5 years and NO girl has ever approached me with such reverence. Granted I’m 32 years old, and am not Asian. Considering all the things she wants to do for you despite her job (which probably isn’t the KTV you’re thinking about), one could say that you’re one “lucky bastard”, haha!
If anything, I’ve been approached by older ladies on the street begging for money and asking me to buy them beverages. “幫大姊喝飲料”。I always buy for them because I’m a nice guy, lol.
She used to be a KTV 小姐, now a nursing student and a PT store clerk. talks about her studies a lot etc. She told me she’s past that old life.
you’re one “lucky bastard”, haha!
If I keep romancing her, I think second base and beyond will be coming. My mind just goes wild imagine how sex would be like with a tall girl with a smokin’ hot body and face! As horny I may be at times, I really want to have a relationship before going to bed with her.
So just go with the flow and stop navel-gazing.