I see. Actually the winkies wouldn’t have helped in this case as I didn’t know the phrase ‘You don’t say?’. Now I do. 
Nobody particularly likes having their passport held away from them.
I really don’t care weather the OP feels slighted or berated, or weather his pride is hurt. I doubt I could change his attitude on this score. But, he damn well knows now that withholding another’s passport is illegal… and he knows that many believe such behavior to be reprehensible.
Often, when I post an idea or opinion, it isn’t for the benefit of the person at whom it appears to be directed. This is a place where ideas and information are exchanged. I read and consider the opinions of many posters… even those of the people with whom I often argue/disagree… It doesn’t matter how I respond (if I do) here… what matters is how I have reflected on the issue… likewise, it matters little whether or not the OP reflects on his behavior and responds indicating that he has seen the error of his ways (though that would be great)… what matters is that anyone reading my and others’ posts considers what is posted.
Something like that.
Nobody particularly likes having their passport held away from them.
I really don’t care weather the OP feels slighted or berated, or weather his pride is hurt. I doubt I could change his attitude on this score. But, he damn well knows now that withholding another’s passport is illegal… and he knows that many believe such behavior to be reprehensible.[/quote]This isn’t addressing what I wrote. I didn’t say that I thought people should not post their views or relevant legal information. And I wasn’t suggesting that just for the sake of it anyone should prioritise the feelings of those to whom they’re addressing their posts. Perhaps you think that I am advocating some kind of vague touchy-feely “nice” behaviour under all circumstances. I am not. As I said, I had a pragmatic point to make, though if you don’t feel it applies to you then disregard it. I took your post as a starting point, ｂｕｔ what I had to say was not really addressed to you personally.
[quote=“Tigerman”]Often, when I post an idea or opinion, it isn’t for the benefit of the person at whom it appears to be directed. This is a place where ideas and information are exchanged. I read and consider the opinions of many posters… even those of the people with whom I often argue/disagree… It doesn’t matter how I respond (if I do) here… what matters is how I have reflected on the issue… likewise, it matters little whether or not the OP reflects on his behavior and responds indicating that he has seen the error of his ways (though that would be great)… what matters is that anyone reading my and others’ posts considers what is posted.
Something like that.[/quote]I understand this. My “reply” to you is a case in point. And I understand that there are many reasons for what people post. My point is simply that when people intend a post to have a chance of being taken in and considered by the person to whom it is ostensibly addressed, they should consider carefully not only the content of what they write, but also how they write it. Obviously my point doesn’t apply when people don’t have this intent.
OK.
Just curious, though. In what type of circumstances would you condone/support/resort to a clear in-your face “nasty” response?
OK.
Just curious, though. In what type of circumstances would you condone/support/resort to a clear in-your face “nasty” response? [/quote]I think that clear responses are good in nearly all circumstances. Somebody who was being vague, touchy-feely, and nice, might never really communicate his/her point of view, which would be a waste of time.
As for out and out nastiness: if a circumstance ever arose in which I thought that personal attacks, sarcasm, or the like would be likely to be successful in getting the target to reconsider his/her position, that’s when I’d consider resorting to them. I can’t remember whether on Forumosa I’ve ever seen what I considered to be such a situation. There might have been one or two times. Not many, though.
So, as I’ve been trying to explain, I don’t see it in terms of being “nice” or “nasty”, or of “giving people what they deserve”. I see it in terms of successful or unsuccessful communication. Successful communication might involve the recipient thinking “Well, I don’t feel very comfortable at having my views on this questioned, but those guys might actually have a point.” Unsuccessful communication could have him or her thinking: “What a bunch of self-righteous wankers. I ask a polite question and get a load of abuse in response”.
I’m not calling anyone a wanker, of course. Just saying that if one doesn’t think carefully about the way in which one frames criticism, one could very well be viewed as a wanker by the person to whom the criticism was addressed. And while this might not be any skin off one’s own nose, it would likely make anything one said to that person ineffective at best, and inflammatory and counter-productive at worst.
Well all said and done. The point is that it’s blatently illegal and should his Maid go to the authorities and the OP ends up posting for help from the Police Station I doubt much sympath will be forthcoming.
In any case passports belog to the governments that issue them, not even to the people who use them.
Maybe the OP should look into this. I’m sure the OP would like to have his employer hold his passport just to make sure he don’t fuck up and runaway.
Well all said and done. The point is that it’s blatently illegal and should his Maid go to the authorities and the OP ends up posting for help from the Police Station I doubt much sympath will be forthcoming.[/quote]Is this just a general point, or is it supposed to be a comment on what I wrote? If the latter, I covered that previously.[quote=“joesax”]I didn’t say that I thought people should not post their views or relevant legal information. And I wasn’t suggesting that just for the sake of it anyone should prioritise the feelings of those to whom they’re addressing their posts. Perhaps you think that I am advocating some kind of vague touchy-feely “nice” behaviour under all circumstances. I am not.[/quote]
Well, luckily most of the Forumosans have a thick skin … I suppose … and can handle nasty and harsh comments …
If I had any advice to give this forum it would be that we should be careful about what we read into others posts or what we assume others intentions are.
We know from those deadful team building excercises that the amount of information lost in written communication vs. face-to-face conversation. Most posts are written very quickly with little proofing (at least mine are).
As for this thread - yeah, go ahead…beat the OP down…so that no one else will raise a controversial question or one where the morals are in question. Better that they continue on in ignorance.