That’s the thing, I have gone to my local government in the past when getting a new ARC to get proof I wasn’t married in my state. I had documented proof I wasn’t married in the us to show I was still unwed in America. I needed that for my ARC. Like they quite literally told me I was single still when I went to the registration office here in my state. I was even told for it to be recognized I would have to bring documentation that’s been verified by taiwans side and register here in the US. I mean maybe I misunderstood. But they told me they had no documentation of me being married….how can I go to my local office here and divorce if they don’t even have it on record? No back lash here, I’m just confused and wanting to better understand what I can do. Really don’t want to just go to a registration office in my home town to get a divorce when they have no records of me even being married
I don’t have any proof. I mean I did have some proof at one time. When he went to another province December of 2020 to visit a woman he was seeing. He sent me videos and pictures of the place and mentioned how he wanted to do her so badly……
But now all that is gone……
As for the property him and his dad used my name to buy it. They used a loan and paid out of their pocket. I didn’t even want the property but they wanted to make more money and my ex already had some property in the area and couldn’t purchase any more in his name. He said that was how the law worked in China
That’s a bit twisted (the bit about telling you how bad he wanted to fuck her… also, why did he tell you that? you were in an open relationship? was it some sort of psychological punishment? retaliation for you doing the same?), but it’s also a pity you don’t have proof of that anymore. Did you remove the chats and/or screenshots? the videos too? any voice message you can use? you didn’t keep anything?
Then it’s fair that he keeps the properties that he paid with his money, innit?
You don’t need proof you were married in the US. You were married in Taiwan but your marriage is recognised by the US… You have proof you are married! The Taiwan household registration transcript and marriage certificate.
You are married in your state, and everywhere else in the world. Of course they can’t provide evidence of your marriage on your state, you weren’t married there. But you are still married. You aren’t single in the US, you are married.
You need to file for divorce.
I never cheated on him, I mean you can believe what you want. I understand no one knows me here. It was pretty much a punishment for not becoming his ideal wife. I wasn’t enough for him so he had to find someone else to “fill in the empty gaps of his heart”. He kept on about how he still loved me but at the same time I was a horrible person for not “changing”.
I deleted my WeChat, that had the evidence….when I left I didn’t think about fighting back and taking him to court. All I wanted was to be away from him and never see him again….I hadn’t really thought it through until he got ahold of me and started threatening to take me to court if I ever married again while still married to him (which of course wasn’t even on my mind, I hadn’t even thought about remarrying….at least not for a good few years).
As for the property, I say good riddance to it. I have no use for it here and plus I never got anything from it when we were together. Any money made off it went to him. I didn’t mind anyways…it just made things a bit of a pain when I had to print off documents, sign them, mail them to him and continuously remake a video because it wasn’t good enough for him…. Finally got the property out of the way though
I’m not questioning, and I’m not judging. I’m trying to get a better understanding of the situation.
Yes. And personally if I were you I wouldn’t think this is unfair.
So I can just file for divorce in my state using the marriage certificate and household registration and then get it translated to traditional Chinese and send it to TECO? I will definitely do this….I’ll check and see what other documents I may need in my state too. I always thought I couldn’t go this route because I didn’t marry here.
No worries, I am just saying there are probably going to be people who say “we don’t know his side…” this is my side and what I experienced. I didn’t mean to come off as rude. I’m sorry about that.
I didn’t think of it as unfair. More than anything I wish I never had the property under my name, that’s all.
Which is a fair description.
No worries! I hope you get out of this without too much hassle.
Understandable.
I’m not American so I don’t know the specifics but the general process for common law countries is just proof you were married in the first place, proof the divorce is mutual OR you served the non-agreeing party with divorce documents, judge issues the divorce.
Where you were married doesn’t matter
Also even if you have trouble registering the divorce with TECO/the HHRO then at least you will be free to marry in the US without fear and you can deal with TECO later
justintaiwan has given you the most accurate advice in this discussion. However, as justintaiwan wrote:
Here’s some basic info:
You can not register a marriage in the United States. There is no such thing. Not at the state or federal level. So forget the idea of “registering” a marriage.
You could perform a second marriage in the U.S. (as your husband suggested), but that would be dumb. There’s no reason to get married again.
If you want a divorce then you need to file a divorce lawsuit in the U.S. state where you live. Some states have self-help resources for people without attorneys, and sometimes you can fill out forms and try to do it yourself. This is not advisable because there’s lots of ways to mess up the process.
It’s safer to hire an attorney, especially because the other party is overseas. If your husband will agree to the terms of divorce he might sign an agreement and you get it done quickly. If he won’t agree, then you’re going to have a longer process to work through a divorce in the U.S.
All of the different states in the U.S. have their own divorce laws, so the specifics about how to get divorced depends on where you live. Flying to Taiwan and getting a mutual divorce at the household registration office would be faster and cheaper, but only if you are guaranteed that your husband will cooperate. From what you’ve written it doesn’t sound like he’s cooperative, so I wouldn’t spend the time to fly back to Taiwan. I think you should keep living your life with an eye on the future, and hire a U.S. attorney to work through the divorce and get it done.
And illegal. It would still be bigamy if the divorce wasn’t finalised somewhere
I was responding to Amanda’s first post where she said this:
Her husband suggested that they “register” a marriage in the U.S. so they can get divorced. I’ve heard of people getting married a second time in the U.S., because they don’t realize that a foreign marriage is already recognized in the U.S.
I wasn’t clear enough. I’m trying to say that Amanda should not try to register OR re-marry the same guy in the U.S.!
And you’re correct. It’s bigamy if she marries someone else before divorcing her husband!
Oh sorry! I thought you were talking about her current partner 
If you suffered from domestic abuse why not take out a domestic violence order against him in the USA.
No he cannot. He has to go through a court procedure to get divorced. He cannot unilaterally divorce her.
He can “denounce” she has left him. He can use his connections. He can divorce her if he wants to. He is manipulating her, torturing her for his amusement and benefit. This is not someone she can trust or negotiate with.
He say say what he likes. To get a divorce he needs to go to court. He cannot just do a divorce by himself without a court hearing and you insinuating he can is nonsense.
However as the OP has already been advised, she can file for a no fault divorce in the USA. She can have that divorce translated, notarized and filed in the courts in Taiwan. The husband cannot prevent this. This was she never needs to communicate with the husband as she cannot appoint a representative to handle her affairs for this.
While this is generally true, this description also makes it sound easier than the reality!
Amanda will have to demonstrate to the U.S. court that her husband has notice of the divorce case. This means he either has to accept the divorce papers, or be served the papers, in accordance with international law and the laws of her U.S. state. After that, he can try to fight it but “no fault” means that if she wants a divorce she’ll get one.
However, the legal and procedural rules are quite specialized or technical so it’s usually easier to pay an attorney to take care of it for you.