Morning exercise ... funny observations

Recently I started going out again in the morning to do some jogging and get back in shape …
My jogging rout into the hills is swamped by older women and the occasional hubby joining them …

Here’s a list of the inventive moves they make:

Belly blob
Belly bump
Back lean crunch
Hip swirl
Frontal hand clap
Dorsal hand clap
Backward hill shuffle (this is to prevent from slipping out of the flip-flops when going uphill)
Flip-flop eject (unwanted result when stretching the legs too fast when wearing flip-flops)
Toe curl (this is used when doing the the flip-flop eject, basically preventing the flip-flops from ejecting)
Hamstring drum
Thigh ruffle

On top of this they make insane noise … you’d think these people are in nature and try to get some relaxing calm quietness … but no, the db’s go up higher than on the wet market or a fighter jet … I had to leave as it started to become really irritating …

I really wish I could stick to my roof top but it’s to small to run around for real exercise …

Vocalizing is definately in this year.
We have “The Barker” in my neighborhood from 5;30-6;00. He does bouncy squates several times and than on about the 4th one he jumps up and lets out a loud bellowing bark while arched back and arms stretched out. This echos around the neighborhood.
Then there is Ms. Dragon Lungs. From about 5;15-5;45 she lets out these 40 second (I’ve timed it) haunting wailing howls. It starts out in a low tone and gets to a very high pitch with her own sort of bark at the end when she completely exhausts the last bit of air from her lungs.
Although she’s about 2KM away–it’s fuckin loud.
It would be fun to go lite firecrackers near them while they excercise.

It’s an improvement in efficiency. They’re combining exercise with that other very necessary task of Making As Much Pointless Noise As Fucking Possible.
In this way, everyone should be able to up their daily output of Pointless Noise at least 10%.

WTF is a “Belly blob”?! Or a “Belly bump”? Please provide descriptions! With photos/diagrams would be even better!

Fortunately, where I live the constant drone of construction and passing trains blocks out any retarded noisemakers that may live in the area.

The belly blob is done jumping up and having the excess fat blobbing down when hitting the ground … to ‘shake off’ the fat …

Belly bump could be better described as Belly drum … hitting the belly with the fists to heat up the fat …

Ah, Belgian Pie, what a pity!!!

I used to live near Daan park and on EVERY single occasion I went there, I would see an old fart doing obscene pelvic rotations in front of a tree. Not always the same guy at the same tree, but basically same “exercice”… Now, I didn’t want to see that, first, and second, what on Earth is that supposed to be good for besides looking insane??? Was it a special species of tree that’s just irresistible??? The Taiwanese Love Tree??? :loco: Or they call it qigong and it’s an excuse to do obscene stuff in public?
At least, they had the semi-decency of keeping silent while doing that.

The clapping routine is also intriguing. Guys/old ladies would clap their hands, thight, whatever for average 30 minutes (timed some a few times, just for fun).

LOVE the belly blumps and slapping. I might try it…

Hey, why don’t laowais start doing crazzy stuff like that? They shake their blob, we shake ours! They do their stuff in front of the tree, we do the same. I wonder what would be the reaction…

For the record, to this day, NOBODY believes me back home when I tell about the “tree abusers”…

I like the barking dog maneuver: thrust elbows back forcefully and bark like a dog, repeat as needed.

I used to go jogging at a school track in Pingtung and would see people slamming themselves up against a tree, and slamming various body parts (namely their calves and arms) against the monkey bars on the playground. :loco:

My wife and I saw lots of belly slapping in Taiwan. Is that Qigong or what?