Most Common Questions a Foreigner Might Ask in Taiwan

[quote=“Kowtow, post:53, topic:154561, full:true”]

Can someone explain how cursing in English and/or flipping the bird can get into legal trouble? English cursing only?
[/quote]

Your answer is here: Suing someone for slander - #6 by yyy

For the record, I have been jammed with Article 310 - twice - and both times my omnipotent benefactor used his guanxi to make it go away. Article 196 was mentioned in passing as well, but it didn’t go to court in either case.

Article 310

A person who points out or disseminates a fact which will injure the reputation of another for purpose that it be communicated to the pubic commits the offense of slander and shall be sentenced to imprisonment for not more than one year, short-term imprisonment, or a fine of not more than five hundred yuan. A person who by circulating a writing or drawing commits an offense specified in the preceding paragraph shall be sentenced to imprisonment for not more than two years, short-term imprisonment, or a fine of not more than one thousand yuan.

What did I do? The first time happened on a return flight to TPE circa 2009. You know how these people make a beeline for the exit before the plane has come to a complete stop and all that? Instead of following deplaning protocol, row-by-row, these fuckers jet up from row 56 like they should be the first fuckers off the plane. Asia is the only place I’ve ever seen this happen on a regular basis.

I usually sit between rows 5-15 on this flight - always on this flight. And I’m always watching for lemmings. As soon as I catch sight of this jackass bolting up from the back, I block his path in the aisle. I’m not big guy, but I have an attitude that almost always does the trick. In this case, dude - 50-something business type - was not pleased, but he didn’t say anything. At first.

Instead he leaned into me, and then trying to squeeze by, I turn and said, “Knock it off, pal.” He said, “Excuse me, you’re blocking the aisle.”

“That’s not how this works.”

So we have a few minutes for him to huff and puff, but the doors open, and I make a point of letting everybody in the rows ahead exit before us down there at row 6. Then I very slowly make my way to the door, with this cunt pushing me the whole way. Finally, he says again, “Excuse me, you’re blocking my path.”

I spin around and say, “Fuck you, man.”

I don’t remember exactly what he said, something about “I’m so-n-so from so-n-so,” but I spit out a variation of the theme: “I don’t care. Fuck off.”

And that was it. I heard his cell phone camera click a couple of times and then in the terminal, he ran ahead and took a shot of my face. Again, I was defiant. Probably threw in another “fuck off” for good measure.

Two days later, at work, the boss comes in with a big smile on his face and asks if I had any trouble at TPE the other night.

Oh no. Turns out this guy was a mid-level mucky-muck in one of the agencies (I can’t say which one, obviously), and he used his clout to track me down. And well, they want an apology, or they want my ass thrown in jail, and then out of the country - in that order.

I chose the apology route and as humiliating as that ordeal turned out to be, that was the end of it.

The second time was just fucking stupid. I got testy with one of the customs people over a shipment of imported goods and signed the receipt with some profanities. That took a month before it circled back around to bite me in the ass. However, I personally did not have to apologize; it was done on my behalf, and the guy was not a super big-wig, so it went away real quick like. Three thousand in a hongbao, I think.