I’ve got one to add:
The killer’s coming after the heroine…she jumps in the car, fumbles for the key…OH SHT, she dropped it on the floor!!! Now she’s got it…it’s in the ignition…OH SHT, the car won’t start!!!
SOOOO sick of that one.
Not hitting the break (and possibly turning around) during a car chase when the chaser is just beside you or has even overtaken you. S.t.u.p.i.d.
Lifts that have a little hatch in the top that you can escape through. Next time you in one look at the ceiling, there’s no hatch.
And bombs always have a LED display showing when it will go off, and they beep.
And phones give a dialing tone when the other end hangs up.
“Hello.”
I hate when people answer the phone like that. 
Everything electronic in a movie goes beep when they press a button or key. If things are secretly downloaded from a computer in the dark of someone’s office and if the owner should return, then the computer automatically senses their return and the speed of the copying process reduces to a crawl, thus causing the thief, assuming they are a good guy, to calmly panic. I say calmly as they can easily find a hiding place in less that a twentieth of a second, when the office door opens and the owner or security steps in to check things out.
Cops who respect civil liberties are repressed, by-the-book nerds.
Cops who torture and illegally search suspects are attractive, dynamic he-men.
Related to one of the items (item 11):
The psycho killer is subdued and on the ground, not moving. Instead of grabbing his weapon and finishing him off, the victim moves away from the killer, turns around and sobs in the foreground, with her back facing the killer.
Then, in the unfocused background, we see the killer rise again. The killer attacks the victim. But at the last moment, the killer is suddenly shot to death by someone we thought died earlier in the movie.
Another one:
Any movie that makes use of the coincidental homophony of “too”, “to” and “two”.
E.g. “2 Fast 2 Furious”, “Look Who’s Talking Too”, ad nauseam
You people are too picky.
She stands there in her robe. She loosens the cord, starts to open it, it slides off her shoulders… and the camera zooms into… her FACE? WTF? SHOW US THE BAZONGAS FER CHRISSAKES!
They call it suspense …
Which wire? … blue or yellow … blue, yellow? … no! it’s the red one … 
Explosions that could only happen if you had a habit of keeping barrels of gasoline in your car or home.
Villains that just don’t die.
Heroes that can fire a wimpy pistol and take out bad guys firing dozens of machine guns.
Cars that make unbelievable leaps, landing without breaking their suspensions or worse.
Fat, homely middle-aged dweebs who miraculously land hot young nymphettes. Oh, no, wait, that one’s real.
People who can’t hit the broad side of a barn despite having a huge arsenal of trained soldiers, automatic weapons, night vision goggles, and heat-seeking missiles.
Stupid pet movies. Especially talking pet movies. Except for “sounder”
Sequels that don’t have the cast from the first episode (which was one of the reasons you watched it in the first place).
Things that explode for almost no reason. Thinks that explode before any real impact has been made.
I second the one about people in mediocre professions that have awesome apartments with awesome views that you would need to be making 150 000 us a year just to tip the doorman at christmas.
The haircuts they give kids, too.
Why is it that nobody can never figure out the real identities of superheros?
People that easily brush off roundhouse kicks to the head. Jacky chan style choreographed action sequences. Well, most of them.
I know. I saw your video. 
- Having hot sex whilst still wearing a bra.
- Being late for something really important, getting stuck in traffic and running to the thing thats so important.
- Nerds being seen as being cool for who they are, and not what they look like, by hot chicks.
- American kids all drive flash cars, drunk, and their dads bail them out.
- Cocky people getting their come-uppance.
- If you have the desire, you can get yourself out of the slums.
- Crazy schemes always working out in the end.
- Cops are often divorced, because they drink too much, even though their wives are hot.
- Cops bosses are stress balls who always give the hero ‘one last chance.’
- Being close to retirement and going on one last mission.
- Disabled people are charming and have soft natures.
- Bad people drink lots of booze, or smoke.
- Italians are very protective of their faaaaamily.
- Money is NEVER an issue.
- Moments of self-realization leading to permanent change. (Thats the biggest cliche crap ever. Life has no sign-posts.)
- Black people are either put upon or are very humorous. White people are stress balls.
- There is no such thing as shrapnel after an explosion.
- Cuts and bruises disappear over night.
- Gay people are easy to spot.
- Hard working women end up alone.
Sean Connery kicking the asses of young professional fighters/soldiers.
Small explosive devices that are being hidden but have a red light flashing.
Endless shooting without reloding.
Cars exploding during virtually every collission, even it’s just a bump into the back of another car.
Pistols (not revolvers) that click when they are empty and the trigger is pulled, usually repeatedly.
Wounds healing within hours.
Typing on a keyboard results in complex manipulations of GUI interfaces.
When words appear on a computer screen, the characters appear in succession, each one accompanied by a high-pitched beep or clicking sound.
Words on computer screens are at least an inch tall.
Computers say “Access denied” when the hero is attempting to break into them.
[quote=“canucktyuktuk”]Sequels that don’t have the cast from the first episode (which was one of the reasons you watched it in the first place).[/quote]You watched Speed because Keanu Reeves was in it ? Or the Fast and the Furious for Vin Diesel ?
Well, Vin Deisel is better than that other guy. I didn’t watch it on purpose. I did watch the sequel to XXX because I wanted to see Vin Deisel Kick some ass, and got Ice cube instead. Pfft!