MrsHill says that she is being sexually harrassed at work. Apparently, her boss flashed a wad of cash in the office, and asked if this was enough to ‘buy her.’ He has also suggested she quit her job to become a whore, and attempts to touch her whilst at work. I had no idea! 
Aside from smacking this chump in the face, what can I do for her? She says she will change her clothes and scream if he touches her again. Is this all she can do about this a-hole?
The guy sounds like a real cunt. Is he bigger than you?
Honestly, let your missus know you are there for her, but encourage her to confront the guy herself. She could tell him straight, or suggest asking his wife what she thinks.
I think it would be better for her if she learned how to deal with these situations herself, but knowing you’re ready to step in if need be.
How about she carrying digital recorder and switch it on when he comes by just in case.
Or this may help…
Absolutely.
And save all inappropriate notes, emails, phone messages or other communications from him.
Start keeping a record at work of all inappropriate comments/behavior, writing down the date, description, and names of all witnesses as soon as possible after each event, before her memory fades.
Any time a co-worker witnesses an inappropriate comment/act, speak with the co-worker and see if he/she would agree to sign a brief statement summarizing what happened. If so, she should prepare that statement ASAP and get the co-worker to sign it before there’s a change of heart.
Collect any other evidence of any kind concerning his comments/acts or any retaliation he takes against her.
Keep a record, with dates and descriptions, and save all receipts concerning any damages she suffers due to his conduct, such as headaches, stomach aches, sleeplessness, arguments at home, doctor or counselor visits, medication, increased use of alcohol, sleeping pills or other medication, etc.
Even in lawless Taiwan, sexual harassment in the workplace is illegal, though attorneys and judges don’t treat is nearly as seriously as they do in the US. And it sounds like she’s got a strong case against this scumbag. But no matter what country one is in it is absolutely essential that one have strong evidence to back up ones legal claims. If it’s just her word against his, it may be a tough case and not worth fighting in court. On the other hand, if it’s possible to gather witnesses or other evidence she should definitely hire an attorney and sue the bastard.
She should find another job. Right now. Sticking around is just asking for it. Try to get some sort of severence package and threaten involving the police if you must. Might not get anywhere or may cause problems elsewhere if you involve the authorities. Not sure on that but I wouldn’t stick around.
I wouldn’t be posting about it on the internet - I’d be pounding on the boss’s door right now, asking him what the hell is going on! A little bit of testosterone is exactly what’s called for. If your wife is truly being sexually harrassed, she’s got zero job security anyway, so you’re not going to be making matters worse.
And apologies to Stray Dog, but I think hsi advice is way off. It would work in the west, but not coming to your wife’s immediate defence (needed or not) is a poor display of loyalty. Granted a logical, rational approach would be ideal, but the emotional, angry one is the way that works here. The boss will say “No, you misunderstand - it was a harmless joke!”, and he may privately think you’re a psychopath, but he will be VERY careful around your wife in the future.
My opinion, anyway.
I met him, I even gave him gifts for his kids. I could lay waste to him easily… But it isn’t my way.
I really apprectiate the advice. I just got told today, and she is obviously very shaken about it. It has been happening for a while… I was suitably angry about the guy, but that only goes so far… I agree that MrsHill needs to know she has my support 100%, and if he touches her again Im gonna go banana’s, but she needs to go in and work, and be professional. She said that on Friday she screamed at him in front of her colleagues “I don’t want you to touch me,” and threw her work on the floor. I hope he has the message…
I agree with Maoman. Pay the perp a visit and give him what’s for!
I’m sorry, but men and women are different, especially when it comes to brain chemistry. They don’t respond to confornation the same way. And then you add the politics of an an office scenario…it’s sheer dynamite.
Either Mr.Hill, or a good friends of same, must pay the chap a visit. And if he says it all a joke gone wrong, you give him some of the business end of things. Those swine won’t learn any other way. This is only my opinion, but I’ve workerd in an office before, and have experience in these matters. Plus I’m 6’3", the women always come to me for help. Shouting and threats of violence are your best bet, especially in a public place.
I wish you well in your endeavor. I’d help if I could. As I can’t stand that shite…
I met him, I even gave him gifts for his kids. I could lay waste to him easily… But it isn’t my way. [/quote]
Good on you Tom Hill. It isn’t my way either but I certainly would be tempted to have a word with him and if he was some big, tough bully boy type I’d be likely to bring along some pepper spray or something. That’s just MHO of course, Mother Teresa is giving you the best advice so far I bet. The notion that maoman and I have that you could talk to the guy yourself doesn’t necessarily preclude any of the steps he mentioned I don’t think though and could also become part of the record of events. Perhaps you could tape record that conversation as well. If I was in your situation I’d probably do pretty much whatever MT suggested. Again, good luck. That’s a stupid, nasty situation to be forced into for sure.
Hi. I’m her husband. Do you know why I’m here?
Do you know what I’m planning to do to you if you ever bother my wife again?
Would you like to know, or would you prefer to just imagine it?
I’ll tell you what – you either treat her with the utmost respect, or the next time you see me, you’d better be carrying a gun.
I met him, I even gave him gifts for his kids. I could lay waste to him easily… But it isn’t my way. [/quote]
Good on you Tom Hill. It isn’t my way either but I certainly would be tempted to have a word with him and if he was some big, tough bully boy type I’d be likely to bring along some pepper spray or something. [/quote]
While your heart is the right place, your tactics aren’t. Pepper spray? That only works on dogs and juveniles. Bring a club and several tough hombres, preferably Taiwanese…
[quote=“Maoman”]I wouldn’t be posting about it on the internet - I’d be pounding on the boss’s door right now, asking him what the hell is going on! A little bit of testosterone is exactly what’s called for. If your wife is truly being sexually harrassed, she’s got zero job security anyway, so you’re not going to be making matters worse.
And apologies to Stray Dog, but I think hsi advice is way off. It would work in the west, but not coming to your wife’s immediate defence (needed or not) is a poor display of loyalty. Granted a logical, rational approach would be ideal, but the emotional, angry one is the way that works here. The boss will say “No, you misunderstand - it was a harmless joke!”, and he may privately think you’re a psychopath, but he will be VERY careful around your wife in the future.
My opinion, anyway.[/quote]
Hey, don’t get me wrong; this is what I would love to see happen.
I just prefer to help people stand up for themselves.
Having said that, when someone did something very inappropriate to my ex at a party, I followed the Maoman approach.
I would still like her to learn to stand up for herself, because there are going to be times when I’m not around to defend her honour (like now 
).
If her sticking up for herself doesn’t work, and if the boss does anything remotely similar to his previous beaviour, then of course go round and confront the slimy toad (no offense to toads).
If someone is pissed off enough, he won’t need weapons or friends. I can tell you this for a fact.
[quote=“Dragonbones”]Hi. I’m her husband. Do you know why I’m here?
Do you know what I’m planning to do to you if you ever bother my wife again?
Would you like to know, or would you prefer to just imagine it?
I’ll tell you what – you either treat her with the utmost respect, or the next time you see me, you’d better be carrying a gun.[/quote]
makes note to be careful about speaking to Dragonbabe - I mean person, Dragonperson
My wife was being harrassed on the job by a co-worker. Another co-worker, someone I had thought was a friend of my wife’s was actually helping this a-hole by giving him things to say in English to my wife. This wasn’t sexual harrassment, more on the lines of “you are UGLY! So Fat!” and worse in Taiwanese, in a very forceful way.
It only lasted one day because I roared down there the next day and gave their boss a good talking to. She (the boss) knew it was happening, and was already taking steps (good on her). I said to her “if he wants to talk like that I will come right down so he can say it to me.”
I was ready to punch the living sht out of that guy, consequences be damned. Begging your pardon TomHill, but where I come from NOBODY talks sht to a guy’s wife and gets away with it.
I also called this ‘friend’ of my wife’s and gave him serious crap, and told him exactly what I thought of him for not standing up and saying something about this jerk’s behaviour. He tried to give me the “you don’t understand Taiwanese culture” line, to which I replied, “any man that allows a woman to be spoken to in that way, especially a friend, is not a man. You are worse than that idiot who was saying those things.”
The upshot of all this was that the guy apologised the next day, in front of everyone, and I got some serious lovin’ from my woman for standing up for her. 
[quote=“FearsomeOrange”]
I also called this ‘friend’ of my wife’s and gave him serious crap, and told him exactly what I thought of him for not standing up and saying something about this jerk’s behaviour. He tried to give me the “you don’t understand Taiwanese culture” line…[/quote]
You foreigners… 
:bravo:
[quote=“Stray Dog”]
makes note to be careful about speaking to Dragonbabe - I mean person, Dragonperson[/quote]
:uhhuh:
I’m so tired of being sexually harrassed by my male students (elementary and junior high). My loaban’s view: “Oh, you should see it as a compliment. They think you are very sexy. That’s why you are so popular.” I don’t want to be popular because I am sexy. I want to be popular because I’m a good and committed teacher. I have blondish hair and green eyes, but I don’t consider myself as a looker and I never wear tight clothes.
After three years and three months of teaching in Taiwan, I have had it. The male students always try to touch my butt and breasts. They make suggestive sounds, they show how big (not really big) my breasts are. I have to hear about “lampa”, “LP (ELLOPEE)”, “boo-boo’s”, “I want to fuck you” in my classes daily.
Yesterday I complained to my “loaban” again. He took the student outside and took the rod with him. The student came back all smiles into the classroom. After class my loaban asked me what’s the big deal?
But what will it help if I change schools? Are they all the same? It feels for me if I’m teaching a bunch of sexually frustrated hooligans here in the South. My school is in a small poor village in Tainan County. How about the other female teachers? Do you have the same experiences?
What are the laws for sexual harrassment in Taiwan? Can anyone please give me some advice on how I should handle this situation. I’m fed up.
Here we have men split into two schools of thought/action:
While No 2. sounds really exciting and romantic to most women, even to me, I really have to go with Stray Dog who put it best so far. I think most women like to be supported but also want to feel empowered to solve their own problems. If I tried but still couldn