The lede said everything I needed to know.
Lucio Delgado, 23, was born blind and uses a cane to get around. He moved to the US from Mexico six years ago.
IKR
(Although the body seems unclear, yes. Yes, I AM sure that is a complete sentence. Cool tip though, bra)
Mr Delgado, who is legally blind under Illinois state law, was told to get a doctor’s note to prove his condition.
We think you’re faking it in order to get away with reading Braille instead of normal writing! 
Some con artists go to great lengths, but that would really be something.
But then there’s a twist!
A lawyer for Mr Delgado said the USCIS had contacted him since his story was first reported last week to offer him another appointment later this month.
Time to move.
Italy being Catholic and all, I’m imagining scenes of people raising their hands to the heavens and saying “it’s a miracle!”
“Red wine” eh? Nice cover story. 
No coronavirus conference due to coronavirus.
“Once all the toilet paper got sold out, they knew they needed some relief,” he said.
Cannabis stores and vendors join the short list of “essential” places that can stay open along with grocery stores, pharmacies and doctors offices, the San Jose Mercury News and other media reported, citing the state’s Bureau of Cannabis Control and local officials.
Keeping people sedated during this time isn’t too bad a thing. It might keep them home. 
Couple disconnects from world for 25 days and returns to pandemic
idk…
getting high leads to extreme munchies, which then leads to 
, which then leads to them finding out again there is no toilet paper.
the irony
which lucky Walmart employee got the chance to boom over the store intercom:
“We need a cleanup on Aisle 3!”
I bet he got some weird looks at the sex shop when he asked for two dozen dildos.
How did you know it was made from dildos? 