[quote=“bismarck”]I believe in the Jewish God and all that that entails with the only difference between what I believe and that which Orthodox Jews believe, is that I believe that Christ was the Messiah…
So in my own strange round about way…I am A JEW… 
[/quote]
Oh, you’re one of those Jews.
Then it means all those Samaritans were kept away from the other Jews for almost nothing for thousands of years.
You could hang out with me more and learn some hebrew from me.
You have to have a jewish mother to be a natural jew, but you can convert without one.
However, to fit in, you mom must be nuts.
Also, get used to talking about your bodily functions and complaining HARMLESSLY… see… You must learn how to complain without causing problems or really giving a fuck if you want to be a good jew. It is a social thing.
You must learn when and why to use the phrase “I feel so persecuted” in such a manner that all your jewish friends will laugh out loud. (I’m good at that one)
You also must learn how to nag someone in such a way that they feel loved.
Watch “The Hebrew Hammer” for reference.
[quote=“Dr_Zoidberg”][quote=“bismarck”]I believe in the Jewish God and all that that entails with the only difference between what I believe and that which Orthodox Jews believe, is that I believe that Christ was the Messiah…
So in my own strange round about way…I am A JEW… [/quote]
Oh, you’re one of those Jews.[/quote]
You betcha!! 
Well, if you can be a jew that means my athietic ass can be too. Cuz I got the whole heritage shit, just not the jewish beliefs.
I do the holidays. Even used to do kosher. (damned asia)
But i have no qualms with saying God .
See. I said it. (Don’t look, mom)
I’m pretty good with putting up my hands when complaining AND I can add “sch-” to the beginning of words.
Start worrying.
Details to follow…