just read another thread about having physical test with your significant half. so I wonder what would you do if your SO confesses that she has herpes…it isn’t like HIV but it’s a STD. will you just walk away? let’s say that you have been together for more than one year and your relationship is very steady
Depends when she got it and who from. If it was during her time with you but not from you, I’d be a bit miffed. Otherwise, so what? Take some simple precautions. Not worth ruining a good relationship over, I’d say.
I would be fucking pissed if I was with someone for a year before they told me something like that…
First- 
Second :fume: :fume: :fume: :fume: :fume:
Third 
okay, will you start a relationship if you are told at the very beginning stage? 
okay, will you start a relationship if you are told at the very beginning stage? [/quote]
Hey at least then you have a choice.
Not telling someone you have an STD is a crime. Plain and simple.
Is that really all you have to worry about? Piece o’ piss.
HG
I used to go for STD/Aids tests about once every two years or so and the doctors would ask all the usual questions about the sort of behaviour I’d been engaged in (which amounted to having sex with my girlfreinds using a condom) and they would always say “You know your chance of having aids is about nil, why do you want the test?” I’d answer that if there was a smidgeon of a chance then I owed it to my partner(s) to get the test. They told me that if everyone thought that way the aids virus would be eliminated in no time. In fact, they told me, the people who knowingly put themselves and others at risk usually don’t get the test. Know why? They are afraid. Bastards.
okay, will you start a relationship if you are told at the very beginning stage? [/quote]
Hey at least then you have a choice.
Not telling someone you have an STD is a crime. Plain and simple.[/quote]
I have to agree with SAF and jdsmith. How could anyone trust a person who would hide such a thing?
If you have herpes you should tell your partner as soon as the relationship turns sexual. If your partner really cares about you, he/she will work things out with you.
okay, will you start a relationship if you are told at the very beginning stage? [/quote]
If someone had something in them that I REALLY effin dug, yes. I wouldn’t be giving any blow jobs, and condoms would be a serious obsession, but yes.
But that is if they told me BEFORE anything happened. If they wait until things have happened? Then no. They put my health at risk and that is NOT cool.
And don’t say “what if they used condoms” because condoms are not fail safe.
Some godawfully high percentage of adults have HSV-1 (>50%) or HSV-2 (>20%). At least in the US–not sure about Taiwan. Most people don’t even know they have it because they don’t have noticeable outbreaks. But they can still have asymptomatic shedding, which can be infectious to sex partners.
I guess what I’m saying is that I wouldn’t run away from someone b/c of herpes per se. In fact, it’s possible that you have herpes and have passed it on to others without knowing it. However, I could see why you might be put off by someone concealing the infection if they know about it.
When I got tested while living in Key West, the woman asked when I’d last had sex, so I looked at my watch and gave her an estimation. Then she asked me to ‘describe the sight’, so I explained how everything looked from the multitude of positions we explored, punctuating it with adjectives such as beautiful, and sexy, only to have her afterwards explain ‘Site. I meant site: S-I-T-E. What was the site of the sexual act?’
Embarrassed, I explained that we started on my bed then went to the rug on the floor before finishing up on the sofa. She waited til I’d finished before she explained in her clinical tone that she wanted to know if it was ‘Anal, oral, or vaginal’. I was so flummoxed at this point that I spurted out ‘Anal!’, before I realised what I’d said and made a correction. ‘Vaginal! Vaginal. Not anal! She was a woman!’ 
All true, sadly (though I may have made up the bits where I sound like a great lover).
[quote=“Stray Dog”]When I got tested while living in Key West, the woman asked when I’d last had sex, so I looked at my watch and gave her an estimation. Then she asked me to ‘describe the sight’, so I explained how everything looked from the multitude of positions we explored, punctuating it with adjectives such as beautiful, and sexy, only to have her afterwards explain ‘Site. I meant site: S-I-T-E. What was the site of the sexual act?’
Embarrassed, I explained that we started on my bed then went to the rug on the floor before finishing up on the sofa. She waited til I’d finished before she explained in her clinical tone that she wanted to know if it was ‘Anal, oral, or vaginal’. I was so flummoxed at this point that I spurted out ‘Anal!’, before I realised what I’d said and made a correction. ‘Vaginal! Vaginal. Not anal! She was a woman!’
All true, sadly (though I may have made up the bits where I sound like a great lover).[/quote]
Hahaha…Go you good thing!
vent/rant/whatever
I went through this situation with my last gf. She found out she had it just before we started dating and told me after we had been sleeping together for a little while. I have been tested and remain clear (test every 6 mnths)but it was quite a confusing time for both of us.
I went through the whole, you should have told me earlier bit but she was relatively young, mortified by what she had, obviously hadn’t yet gotten used to living with it etc etc. As with most blokes the tears won me over and we carried on seeing eachother, exercising care and restraint. Eventually she dumped me, wish I had dropped her first when I had the excuse.
This doesn’t really help does it? I had better write vent or rant or something at the top 
I can tell you what guys do when I tell them I have genital herpes.
- They freak out. Just because the word itself sounds so bad.
- They learn about genital herpes.
- We agree on using condoms.
- They say they don’t really like condoms and they’d much rather have sex without a condom, cause herpes doesn’t really seem so scary anymore. :loco:
Not that I’ve had a whole lot of partners, but it does amaze me how ignorant people are on the matter of STDs. They have unprotected sex on a regular basis, setting themselves in risk, and then freak out even though the risk of getting herpes while using condoms is MUCH smaller than getting all sorts of stuff while not using a condom. I sometimes seriously wonder: Why should I care while an average guy doesn’t give a shit about his or my health and would happily set us both in a high risk just because he thinks that condoms aren’t comfy enough.
Yeah, I tell my partners about having herpes but I’m just so sick and tired of ignorant careless men (and women, too, but I don’t sleep with them). Face it - most of you have never been tested for herpes but still have occasional/regular unprotected sex just because the willy looks clean 
.
The point is that you tell them. You are honest. Not being honest about a health risk you are aware you have is just fucked.
Wrap that rascal!