[quote=“bighoneydog”]What a wonderful post, nemesis! I totally second everything you say. We’re in a similar situation, although we’re not in Taiwan (yet!) - I was born in Taiwan but grew up in various countries overseas, mainly the UAE - my husband is English, from London. We met in the UK when I went over for Uni (same college) - and then solved the problem of whose parents to disappoint and whose country to live in by moving over to the other side of the world and starting afresh in a totally new country! 
You’re right - if you’re both “foreign”, it helps to keep you on the same side.
We’ve been living in NZ for 6 yrs now and loving it - but can so relate to your points about the stress of spending every free vacation doing “duty” family visits and having all savings poured into that…we quickly made the decision to only go back every 2 yrs (and we usually do a loop trip of Dubai and London) - however, recently with parents ageing and getting ill, it’s beginning to look like we’ll have to make more frequent trips whether we like it or not.
At the end of this year, my husband is heading off to the US for a 1 yr research fellowship and I will be coming to live in Taiwan by myself (well, with the pets!) due to financial reasons. It’ll be the first time we’ve lived apart in our 11yr marriage, so it’ll be an interesting experience :s Everyone has been horrified at this “drastic” decision but Paul needs to do this fellowship as part of his training and it’s the only way we can prevent coming out of the year with terrible debt - and we thought that if a relationship is strong enough, it should be able to withstand some challenges. Hope we’re right! 
Looking on the positive side, I’m looking forward to “re-discovering” my own country and brushing up on my Mandarin!
H’sin-'Yi[/quote]
I truly wish you both all the best. It will be challenging for both of you, and I’m sure you’ll come through it fine! Will you both be returning to NZ when all is said and done?
My husband is starting a 3yr sub-specialist training and they only offer the training positions in Australian hospitals(Honestly! Sometimes I feel like a gypsy!!