Don’t do it.
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You won’t be able to once you move in. If her health gets worse, he won’t be able to leave.
If you move out while she is healthy, she will assume it is because you don’t like her and it will cause trouble.
How important is it to your husband?
What do you want to do?
This.
Unless there is an unfortunate reason making it absolutely necessary, such as poverty or someone needing permanent care.
Agree
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Almost every asian family has a useless father, as how well you described, clawless tiger loll
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No they don’t.
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No.
You can visit.
Or she’s sad and or dependent on him. Don’t need to assume the worst all the time.
So you want to move into a house someone else owns and doesn’t want you in the house. Don’t be surprised when you get arrested for trespassing if the owner decides to make a complaint. Would you accept your husbands father just moving into your house without your permission?
Based on what you say, I would not not move in because of the father. everything else, eh, sounds fine, if it’s what you want you do. Multi-generational households are fine if the specific household is not totally dysfunctional - social connections and family are healthy, it saves money, builds generational wealth, etc etc etc
Update: Apparently, the father didn’t know that we had been married. Once he found that out he came around. We are a little more civil now. I guess my mother-in-law shamed him for treating his two sons differently, and now that we are married he gave up on trying to expel the foreign devil as I am clearly here to stay. I decided to give it a chance and I will move in. If it turns to shit, we (me and my husband) will just move out. Wish me luck.
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best of luck! i’m nosy and would love updates if you’re wanting to give them.
to answer the original question, i don’t think i’d’ve done it, but that’s partially because i like having my own space. i do currently live at my girlfriend’s place like 2/3 of the time, but there’s no history of bad blood with her mom (who also lives there and cares for her non-communicative dad). plus, i can easily run around the corner back to my own apartment!