Hmm… wasn’t something similar discussed in an earlier post about crazy xiao jie in Taiwan? I was going to post something there, but that thread was kind of old so I didn’t want to bring it up again.
So here’s what I think: Social conservatism is one thing, but many failed to consider the fact that sex education in Taiwan isn’t really that open and “educational” (which I guess contributes to "social conservatism?). I still remember in middle school whenever guys talked about sex/girls, some girls would frown and at the same time complained “hao2 er3 shin1 oh5~~” (that’s disgusting!). To some extend, my guess is those same girls never grew out of it.
It’s not so much they don’t talk about it or have no one to talk to (you should all know by now, Taiwanese are gossipy! ). But rather the mentality and attitude towards sex never developed or matured beyond the point of “er3 shin1” (disgust). The shame and disgust of discussing sex (or acts of such) stay with them even when guys approached them. And I would argue the shame immediately turned into anger and fear as soon as the first guys tried to finger them. And indeed, the believe that “one must not have sex until after marriage” is still alive and well among some women (no more, I am told. I was “informed” that one can not find a young virgin in Taipei anymore).
The lack of interaction with guys is based on the same points made above, disgust and fear. And the not-so-pretty girls never receive attention from guys becauase, you probably have noticed, they always hang out with one pretty gal as the “best friend”… and the best friend is always the crown jewel guys are after. That fear and shame is then brewed to become dispise and self-pitty. Discouraged with low self-esteem, they spend less time in their appearance and behavior, hence the cycle continues (I am not pretty enough; no guys will pay attention to me; I don’t need to spend time lookig pretty for those bastards; I don’t want to ever talk to them! [and in the meantime, the guys are thinking] what the hell, there’s no way I am going to go out with that nerd; who’s her best friend – She’s hot; how come she’s always quiet and looks as if she hates me?)
This even happens to pretty girls too. They are insecured and afraid that guys are only interested in their bodies and looks. Unfortunately, I think guys have some kind of sixth sense (speaking from my own experience). The less the girl feels secured, the more she acts insecured and uncomfortable, and the less we are attracted to her. Not that this is a reason to dump someone, but it sure creates a lot of unnecessary problems (please refer back to the “creazy xiao jie” thread for more info). Of Asian girls from different nationalities I have dated, Taiwanese girls rank #1 in insecurity (hence, in some ways, craziness.)
A little off topic here: Austrialian Chinese girls are great with their independence, smart, witty and funny; one feels completely relaxed with them; Malaysian Chinese girls are my favorite, very family and traditional in some ways, but still retain the western flavor of independence and personal ambition; I love them so much that I married one! Pre-generation-X Japanese girls are totally traditional and very family oriented; you don’t have to tell them what to do in terms of chores, cooking and they orient their worlds around you; it can become a burden pretty soon to some; Hong Kong girls… control freaks! [don’t flame, just my observation and experience!]