There’s as much chance of England beating Australia as there is of me getting laid by Faye Wang. Perhaps I’d even be hard put to say which of those would give me the greater pleasure if the miracle occurred … but no, truly, even England winning the world cup would be no match for as little as a hug and a grope with the luscious Faye.
And pigs can fly…
and the world is flat…
I don’t think any side in the World Cup can beat Australia on their current form. Only rain or a dodgy pitch could see the Aussies lose.
The Australians have just butchered Namibia. After notching up a tad over 300, they bowled out the hapless Namibians for just 45. Can you imagine England being so dominant over any opposition? No, even the smallest of minnows would give England a run for their money. Just look at the difference in the margins of victory by Australia and England over the Namibians, and there you have a pretty accurate measure of the gulf in class between the two sides – I was about to write “old rivals” instead of “two sides”, but England don’t come close enough to the standard of the Aussies to deserve to be called their rivals. Though England might fare slightly better than the Namibians against the Ozbods, the general outcome (a one-sided romp to victory for Australia) will be pretty much the same.
You’re forgetting one thing:
“It’s a funny old game”
Anyway, any instructions on how to watch the cricket through poxy or any other servers or whatever might just pull me out of my 5-year laziness induced hiatus form folllowing the game. Any NZ fans here? Come on, give me an update on our chances. My old cricket guru from home sent me his analysis of the four ways in which we could still advance (along with an incredibly cogent critique of the war against Iraq, but I won’t go into the details for fear of sparking off the 47th argument thread about that), but I deleted and then forgot that. A NZ vicotry might just inspire me to become a fully-fledged fan again.
Finally, justs a tip I’d like to share befor I lose the abiliy to find the right jeys on this keyboard:
Hot ginger tea and whiskey - although not quote in the same leaguie as the Gin ‘n’ Tonic, this is a fabulous drink whoch I really recommend you try some time. Btw, am I going to feel bad tommorrow for drinking far too much ginger?
Brian
We have a drink in Scotland called Crabbies Ginger Wine, which is about as strong as sherry and really tastes like the ginger tea you get here. A shot of Crabbies mixed with a shot of whisky – OH! YEAH!
Side note: We used to have a guy in our rough-shooting syndicate back home who’s a Kiwi, and on winter shoots he used to bring this drink that was basically sherry with chili peppers marinated in it. Sounds disgusting, but it was fabulous on a January morning in the forest with the temperature way below zero. He said it is a traditional Kiwi outdoorsman’s tipple. Ever heard of it?
Chilli-wine. Heard of it. People drink it in NZ, but I’ve never tried it. My brother had a story about some chilli wine, but I don;t rmemebr it well, something to do with Chilli wine, a pool of vomit, and some nasty drug dealers.
Brian
Lanka is getting a royal treatment from WI, they are 60/1 after 16 overs
Circket is indeed a funny game
Just a quick question here.
What do they do with the cricket when the competition is over? Do they let it loose in a field somewhere?
[quote=“ponchi”]Lanka is getting a royal treatment from WI, they are 60/1 after 16 overs
[/quote]
just following the scoreboard, couldn’t get willow sorted out, finally got a proxy set up then pay pal refused my cc? whatever. 228 , they’ll have to keep their wits about them.
Ginger wine! In Oz we have “Stone’s Ginger Wine”…
The mates & I would sometimes head out to watch the one-day cricket matches, arriving at “The Gabba” with a watermelon in hand, as “fruit” was allowed into the grounds, but alcohol was not. Earlier that day, we’d cut a little hole into the watermelon, scooped out the insides, and then poured a bottle of ginger wine, a bottle of vodka, a little Bundaberg Rum, some juice and a bottle of soft drink inside (yep, we used BIG melons). Lunch time festivities were as follows: drink melon, eat melon, have drunken mushy melonfight in the outer. Lots of fun, though I can’t remember much about the cricket…
Cheers,
The Big Babou
I still do that here, Babou, but your cocktail sounds better – I just make a hole in the melon and use a chopstick or whatever to smash up the inside as much as possible, drain off some the mush, add a bottle of vodka, plug the hole back up and stick the whole thing in the freezer for a couple of hours. Vodka-melon slushpuppies…
Indians are looking pretty good at the moment 2 fa 145 of 20 chasing 273. You wouldn’t wanna lose Sachin though Ponch!! That’d mean your tail needs to bat 
The sound of the collective groan from at least half a billion Indians when Sachin fell for 98 must have been audible in outer space. But things aren’t looking too good for India now. With Sachin gone, they’re more than likely to flounder into one of their trademark collapses, especially in such a high-pressure match. I’m keeping my fingers crossed for them, but don’t hold out too high hopes. Anyway, it’s a real thriller, worthy of all the pre-match hype.
And so is the Kenya v. Bangladesh tussle. The Banglies are looking just about on course to notch up their first win, though Kenya could still pull it back with some inspired bowling and a little bit of luck. Much as I’d love to see a Kenyan victory, I expect the Bangladeshis’ greater experience (albeit almost exclusively of losing) to see them safely home this time. But again it’s a real nail-biter that could hang in the balance right up to the last over.
Come on India! Come on Kenya!
Omni, I couldn’t believe what you were saying, so I snuck over to baggygreen.com to find the Bangas struggling at 7 for 158. Buckeys. The Kenyans are having themselves a nice little tournament. I think it’s time for all the closet Kenyans to speak out. Anyway, India are still looking strong too.
Brilliant stuff from Odumbe again. He’s spinning his magic and has just taken two more wickets (figures of 4-23 from 8 overs so far) to swing the match towards the Kenyans. Added to his half century off 40-odd balls to push Kenya up to a defendable total, he’s having one hell of a match.
Oh, YES! Well done Kenya! Steve Tikolo has finished off the Banglies with three quick wickets. Great stuff!
And India’s fragile middle order is holding up well – they’re within sight of victory now, but not by any means home and dry.
Indians have kept the WC record, Ind 4 Paki 0 
this is a Quote from India’s leading paper
[quote]India’s opening batsmen lit into the Pakistani pacemen with such ferocity that it begged for a UN intervention. Fifty cascaded of just five overs as Tendulkar and Sehwag smashed them around the park. Shoaib retired after just one over after conceding 18. Each time he came back for another fling, the Indians creamed him.
Regimental duty in Kargil might have been pleasanter.
[/quote]
another
[quote]Just two weeks ago, irate fans in India were berating their country’s cricketers after their poor World Cup start.
Captain Sourav Ganguly was given a mock funeral in Kolkata while black paint was hurled at middle-order batsman Mohammad Kaif’s house in Allahabad.
But India’s fans now appeared to have been pacified.
“We don’t care any more if we don’t win the World Cup,” said Saket Malhotra, a 26-year-old doctor, pouring himself a shot of Tequilla. “Beating Pakistan is enough for me!”
[/quote]
I loved it…
aust 134/7 in 7 overs… against england’s 204/8
can they win :?: :?:
The Aussies pulled off an amazing victory with two balls to spare. Poor England. They seem to be perpetual losers.
Sachin Tendulkar is definitely the player of the tournament so far. However, Australia’s batting line up is just so strong. You can always be sure that at least one of the Australian batsmen will play a great innings in any match.
[quote=“taiwan boy”]Poor England. They seem to be perpetual losers.
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England are the sorriest bunch of losers ever to set foot on a cricket field - their stunning ability to flop adds a whole new dimension to the term “losers”. Who but they could possibly have pulled defeat from the jaws of victory the way they did against Australia? They must have really panicked when they realized that a win was being presented to them on a platter – how could their abject loser mentality have handled it? Luckily for them, the Aussies roused themselves to the minimum extent needed to ensure that all went according to script. So goodbye and good riddance to England!