[quote=“Flicka”][quote=“Erhu”]The other night I went out with a Taiwanese guy and he actually got mad when I insisted on paying my half. He said he wasn’t a “gigolo”, whatever that means…I think in Taiwan, the man paying is a matter of face. I’ve honestly never been out with a Taiwanese guy who didn’t pay.
Here’s what else: dude also escorted me to the bathroom and waited there for me to return, grabbed my arm everytime we crossed a street, and actually reached over and buckled my seatbelt for me when we got into the car. This kind of treatment from Taiwanese men seemed endearing at first, but it gets tedious after a while. It’s really no wonder that many women here act like little girls, when they are treated as such by men.[/quote]
Why don’t you just let him pay for you? Or establish who will pay before you sit at the table, like on the phone while you are making the date? (Or the face-saving compromise–ok, you get dinner and I’ll get the movie). Save the Western-feminist-I-pay-my-own-bills schtik for your dates with foreign men.
You know, I am reading this, and I am thinking, give these guys a break, lady. There’s a billion other factors here–the language barrier, he’s probably so nervous and anxious to impress you he doesn’t know what to do, etc. Even the most together men crumble and act weird in the face of a hot, foreign babe with a brain and a great pair of legs. He doesn’t really care if you are eating three square meals a day–he had a great time with you and can’t get you out of his head.[/quote]
haha ya pretty true. The Taiwanese girl makes a statement on a first date with a guy by insisting or allowing a guy to pay for her meal. If she insists on paying for her own meal, that means (in a Taiwanese social situ) that she doesnt really like the guy and wants to let him know that its ONLY PLATONIC DUDE, DONT GET ANY IDEAS!! IF she lets him pay, it means that she kinda likes him and there could be another date soon. So by insisting to pay our lady is telling the dude that he shouldnt call her up too soon (and probably never should) !! And doesnt give him any face either. Means she doesnt respect him or looks down upon him. ITs all NEGATIVE. IN other words.
To the average westerner, it would be expected and lady-like for her to offer and even insist on paying. And the guy would feel comfy with her (her not being a gold digger) and be keen to ask her out again.
The differences here are like the CAT/DOG thing. Dogs bend their ears and wag their tails to show they like a dog they just met. Whereas if a cat did that, it would be FIGHTIN TIME.
But my cat has learned to bend his ears and wag his tail when introduced to a small dog his size and even sniffs the dogs nose (just like dogs do) and hes not mad at all.
So you gotta go with the flow 
escorting you to the toilet and waiting for you to come out is excessive tho?? And helping you with the seatbelt buckle is somewhat ok. Holding onto you while crossing the road is pretty normal. HEy crossin the street here can be life changing you know?
