I envison this thread as following the gay anal sex thread Wolf started a few months ago. That is, a genuine, but not too stuffy discussion of female pleasure.
I remember a quote from an article I read not long ago on the prevalence of oral sex amongst teenagers. The quote read, “No one ever cried from oral sex.”
The point was that regular intercourse brings us to emotional peaks that are not simply about pure sexual pleasure. There is something primal, something that touches the core of who we are during intercourse that cannot be duplicated just by stimulating the sex organs.
So, wherefore female orgasm? Is it always necessary during a sexual episode as the women on Sex and the City would have us believe? Or is sex just a whole lot more complicated than that and any attempts to treat it in a textbook way will result in pleasure, yes, but rapture, never.
[quote=“Tomas”]1. Deep emotional connection between the two people.
[/quote]
Not sure about this one. The best sex I ever had was with an Iranian born American woman who I didn’t really like as a person all that much. She was, however, incredibly skilled in bed.
[quote=“mungacious”][quote=“wolf_reinhold”]I have nothing to say until 25 different women reply here first.[/quote]are there even 25 distinct female individuals on this board?[/quote]There are more than 25 in the woman’s forum, where they are probably discussing this in private too, saying how we evil men don’t understand and don’t communicate.
Doesn’t this belong on the “You’re so vain, you probably think this thread is about you” thread?
Sorry to disappoint, guys, but no one’s talking about you in the Women’s Forum. We’ve got better things to talk about. And if no one’s posting here in response to your new thread, you might want to think about the way people typically respond to women who DO post on this sort of thread. Why would we bother, really? I’m not talking about “failure to communicate”, I’m talking about “failure to discuss in a discussion forum”. If it’s one-liners you want, you-all can do just fine on your own.
Female pleasure? It’s a snap. First, you (sincerely) compliment your woman frequently. You figure out what she likes to drink, and get her one before she asks. You clean up dinner while she relaxes on the sofa. In bed, you think of her needs as being slightly more important than your own.
Some of the best sex I have ever had has been with people I truly loved.
Some of the best sex I ever had was with people I liked ok but certainly didn’t love.
Some of the best sex I have ever had was with people I actively disliked.
Some of the best sex I have ever had was with people I did not know.
Some of the best sex I ever had was with people with whom I did not share a language.
It is difficult to say now how they felt about it but at the time it seemed that they felt as warm and excited as me.
My theory is that the female orgasm is in the process of evolving. Some woman have them easily and some can’t no matter how hard they (and we) try. I don’t see any problem with this unless a woman starts thinking that she must be abnormal or something and then goes to extremes trying to have something that she really is not particularly predisposed to. Anyway I think sex is about doing what feels great. If it leads to orgasm that’s wonderful. If it doesn’t so what. Heck I think I could live without orgasms myself. And yes I know sometimes women want to really bear down and concentrate but if it becomes a federal case I’m out.
They say it is difficult to get information about sex because everybody lies. I didn’t here.
Most of my girlfriends never had trouble climaxing; but one never had, with anyone, and wanted sex for whatever it was she got out of it. (Odd way of putting it, perhaps, but she was not emotionally stable.)
The second who had difficulty, we found a few ways that usually worked, but she often didn’t want to try them, preferring to relax and enjoy whatever happened instead of struggling for an orgasm.
[quote]He said, “Mary is the rarest gem and she’s the wildest flower;
I’ll make my Mary merrier with ev’ry passing hour.”
So I made a certain sacrifice; as soon as we were through,
I said “Your Mary loves you, lad,” and he said “Mary who?”
– Mary Prankster, “The World is Full of Bastards”[/quote]
ironlady, are we really that bad? Seems like several of the posters (Tomas, Maoman, bob, MapoDurian) have tried to offer a sincere answer. Also, seems like Mucha Man’s start to this thread was thoughtfully written.
Well, we can soon put an end to that. It would after all be so terribly unfair of us to whip Ironlady’s whipping boy out from under her feet in such an underhanded manner.
Ensuring that the lady gets maximum pleasure is fairly easy. First, diet is very important, so make sure your love has plenty of fresh, short grass – they dislike long grass due to their dentition. Meadow wildflowers, and lots of them, are always guaranteed to spice things up. Some like sweet music, but the best is from nature – the soughing of the breeze across the paddock, the gentle burble of a nearby brook, the sweet melody of the skylark, that kind of thing. The weather? Vital for a true earth-shattering orgasm – no lady likes to bump uglies when her fleece is sodden with rain or clumped up with ice.
Technique is also important. Consult Mapodurian’s avatar for some helpful hints.
Happy lovin’!
Here’s an easy analogy:
clitoris is to a female as penis is to a male
The problem is a lot of guys don’t even know where the clitoris is located. I’ve seen studies where only about half of the guys asked could correctly identify the clitoris on a diagram of a woman’s body.
If you’re a guy and you don’t know, do some research immediately!
Also, society reinforces the idea that intercourse is all it takes to get a woman off. Society is totally geared towards men’s sexual preferences while ignoring or suppressing the desires of women. How many pornos have you seen where a guy manually stimulates the woman’s clitoris for the 10-20 minutes that it takes for a woman to achieve orgasm? I’ve yet to see that!
Women are labelled cold or abnormal if they somehow can’t achieve orgasm by intercourse alone, when the fact is that is not abnormal at all! While some pleasure can be had from intercourse, if there is no clitoral stimulation, the likelyhood of a woman achieving orgasm is next to nil.
Add to this the fact that some women themselves (particularly younger women) can be ignorant about their own bodies. Many women that I’ve talked to admit that they discovered their clitoris and how to orgasm somewhat accidently.
For the woman who does know how to please herself, teaching her man how to please her can be a frustrating experience. Men are very sensitive about this issue and can get really defensive when a woman makes suggestions. Some guys are also just downright impatient and unwilling to do what it takes to please a woman.
In order for women and men to have mutually satisfying sexual experiences I believe there needs to be a paradigm shift, especially on the part of the man.
I hope I’ve explained this clearly from a female perspective. I don’t want to talk about my experiences personally, but am happy to discuss this issue “theoretically” if it can help someone.
Well, we can soon put an end to that. It would after all be so terribly unfair of us to whip Ironlady’s whipping boy out from under her feet in such an underhanded manner.[/quote]
Am I her whipping boy now? Oh, goodie. Tie me up first, hot mama!
[quote=“Sandman”]Consult Mapodurian’s avatar for some helpful hints.
Happy lovin’![/quote]
(For future reference, it is currently Prince William of England cuddling with a lamb who is FAR too young for him. Cradle-robber.)
Well obviously who are they catering to more? I mean if the demand was there from women, I’m sure things would change. I imagine it skews pretty wide though as it is.
I don’t think that’s necessarily true. I would think it serves to crush a guys ego more than it discourages his view of the woman. But maybe that’s just me.
So true. I have so many female friends back home, and it seems like the whole “pleasing yourself” thing is still so taboo, when it shouldn’t be. Haha as funny as it sounds I do enocourage the “innocent ones” to give it a shot because it has helped others in their overall sex lives. But again, that’s just me.
Yup. I guess it’s just the “as long as I get mine” attitude, which really sucks IMO. :no-no:
[quote=“Erhu”]Add to this the fact that some women themselves (particularly younger women) can be ignorant about their own bodies. Many women that I’ve talked to admit that they discovered their clitoris and how to orgasm somewhat accidently.
For the woman who does know how to please herself, teaching her man how to please her can be a frustrating experience. Men are very sensitive about this issue and can get really defensive when a woman makes suggestions. Some guys are also just downright impatient and unwilling to do what it takes to please a woman.
[/quote]
I just wanted to note that I would be happy to be of assistance to any women who need help in these endeavours.
