[quote=“Quentin”]Seriously, the last time I tried pulling in a bar, the woman I wound up with, somehow the conversation steered towards the end of the night about my penis and what its exact measurements were, before she would agree to go home with me. This was…what’s the word?..skanky, way too skanky for me. Cute and hot, but even I’ve got standards.
(For Housecat: it was in the legendary Roger’s Rec off of Dickson St.)[/quote]
That reminds me of that song, Quinton. That song that I can never quite figure out the words to, but sounds a lot like a hookah talking to a prospective trick. You know, something like, “sldidjf ya, lemme adlkjf ya, so I’ll know how hard I gotta work ya.”
Anyway, like my friend once said, “Girl, if you go spend the night in Memphis, you’re gonna wake up singing the Blues!”
[quote=“Quentin”]Seriously, the last time I tried pulling in a bar, the woman I wound up with, somehow the conversation steered towards the end of the night about my penis and what its exact measurements were, before she would agree to go home with me. This was…what’s the word?..skanky, way too skanky for me. Cute and hot, but even I’ve got standards.
[/quote]
Now, there’s a thing. I had a conversation like that just a couple of weeks ago (although not in a bar). Skanky? Didn’t seem like that to me … she just had, uh, high standards. Or in this case, long standards.
Seriously, I can’t understand guys who pick up women in bars expecting a quick shag and then complain that the girl is ‘skanky’. A one-night stand is sleazy by definition, so if you’re shocked by dirty talk in the bar, you’re going to be a big disappointment when you get her home. You are equally skanky, dude, so get down to it, if that’s what you want, and stop grouching. Who did you expect would be getting naked for you, Mother bloody Teresa?
Or … could it be that Quentin just didn’t meet the requirements?
Well, yes, if you put it that way. That was sort of my point…bars are good for that and ONLY that, it seems. Which is why it’s better to pick up women in art museums than bars if you’re looking for more than just a sleazy one night stand. It’s more difficult in the short run to pick up women in non-bar public places, though.
It’s easier to pick up women in bars because at least half of the women in a bar have gone there hoping to be picked up!
I’d say 99% of women you find in an art museum have NOT gone there to get picked up. Of course, they will be harder to pick up.
In general, one “picks up” women/men for sleeze specific purposes. If you’te looking for something more than that, you’re trying to “meet” someone.
See? If even the terms are different, then perhaps the approach should be? You can’t think about a girl you may be interested in as one you’d like to “pick up.” And if you try to “pick her up” instead of “meet her,” she’ll respond accordingly.
Ah … my apologies, I misunderstood your original post But in that case … housecat is basically right. Personally I hate bars - you can barely hear yourself think anyway. Erudite conversation is pretty much impossible.
On the other hand … I’ve had two very, very good relationships that started off real sleazy, and the aforementioned cock-measurer is a very nice girl - smart, interesting, good company. So don’t discount a girl just because she wants to check what’s in your pants before getting on to more important questions. Because, let’s be honest, you’ve had days like that too, right? Also, there probably are some female Quentins hanging around in bars thinking “how come I never meet nice guys here?”.
I’m always a little reluctant to give advice on threads like these, partly because some people are simply beyond help but also because I don’t think my own techniques would work very well for others. I would never try chatting to a pretty girl in a museum. Well, that’s not exactly true but I would never approach any girl in a public place without some kind of a sign that she was interested in me. I would want at least a smile from her first, or her initiating eye contact, or some shared experience on which to strike up a conversation. For example, today on the MRT a girl trod on my flip flop wearing foot - the train took off as she was trying to take the vacant seat next to me. She looked me in the eye and apologized very sweetly before sitting down. I said, ‘That’s okay’ and gave her a smile. I guess I could have continued by pointing out that I have large feet and it wasn’t exactly all her fault. But I didn’t because I already have a girlfriend and I don’t spend my days ‘hunting’. And, anyway, I very much doubt that the poor girl saw me and thought, ‘He looks cute, I think I’ll go stand on his foot’. But at least, if I had of continued the conversation a little, it would have seemed quite natural. Walking up to strangers and starting a conversation completely without reason just comes across as weird, if not a form of mild harassment.
Unless you’re hot, of course. Otherwise, just leave the poor girls alone.
this is not just about dating, it’s about social power… in any circumstance with anyone, stranger, friend, your boss, your coworkers. people wanna be around other fun company. misery wants its own company. now, which would you rather choose. if you’re gonna be negative and crap, you’re not going to be very fun to be around (the sense I get reading Q’s posts). so buck up, it’s all in the mind, BEE POSITIVE, even if you have to visualise in the mirror (like checking your shoes and shirt) before you go out. don’t be the wet sock (towel?). be the shiny, funny, magnetic person.
[quote=“Quentin”]Which one has the hotness delusion? Some guy makes small talk to her in a museum, she found him boring and unnattractive, so she writes a snarky little column accusing him of “hotness delusion” because a slob like him should obviously know better than to try and talk to such a smoking hottie as her. I guess I must suffer from hotness delusion syndrome for having the audacity to talk to girls. Apparently, unless you look like Brad Pitt, some women will take offense at your trying to chat them up.
This is funny. I am a Taiwanese man and if a woman starting to hitting on me I would brag with all my guy friends instead of complaining in a blogs post read by other angry over-aged women. Besides, if the man started to talking to her, he probably thought he has a chance which means she is probably average looks too.
[quote=“Quentin”]Which one has the hotness delusion? Some guy makes small talk to her in a museum, she found him boring and unnattractive, so she writes a snarky little column accusing him of “hotness delusion” because a slob like him should obviously know better than to try and talk to such a smoking hottie as her. I guess I must suffer from hotness delusion syndrome for having the audacity to talk to girls. Apparently, unless you look like Brad Pitt, some women will take offense at your trying to chat them up.
the reason a guy like that acts like that isnt because he thinks he’s a hot item… its because he’s old and shameless. and he knows that that’s (being shameless) half the battle. If he stopped to worry about the fact he’s fat, old and bald he’d get nowhere… and he probably when he was young worried about being skinny, hairy and young…
Women are so riduculous. They think they can dress like a tart and only cool rich handsome guys that look like Brad Pitt (or how he used to look like 20 yrs ago) will ogle them. in fact, all guys like to ogle women dressed as tarts, and the old ones are just rather more shameless about it. duhh…
additional note - single men ageed 40 may be in short supply, but who’s to say mr Romeo was single? being married never stopped a shameless middle-aged guy ogling a fit young bird…
[quote=“finley”][quote=“Quentin”]Seriously, the last time I tried pulling in a bar, the woman I wound up with, somehow the conversation steered towards the end of the night about my penis and what its exact measurements were, before she would agree to go home with me. This was…what’s the word?..skanky, way too skanky for me. Cute and hot, but even I’ve got standards.
[/quote]
Now, there’s a thing. I had a conversation like that just a couple of weeks ago (although not in a bar). Skanky? Didn’t seem like that to me … she just had, uh, high standards. Or in this case, long standards.[/quote]
you folks never heard of lying? and then when the time comes, just have a bedroom lighting malfunction, or say you’re shy… the Thai hookers do it all the time…
Anyway, I think Quentin’s point that he was put off by the question itself, not by the fact that he didn’t have a good answer - who knows, maybe she didn’t know what she was missing.
[quote=“finley”]
Anyway, I think Quentin’s point that he was put off by the question itself[/quote]
About a month or so ago I was waiting at the bus stop and this girl sitting next to me started going off about how long it had been since she’d been laid. Now, if I’d been the only other person around, it would have been unmistakeable why she would have brought the subject up But as there were several other people around, it seemed an odd thing to be loudly complaining about in public and bringing up as a conversation starter with complete strangers. “Yeah, I have my vibrator, but that’s not good enough…what I really get off on is the hugging, kissing, touching, skin on skin, the touching and intimacy.” A pretty average looking woman, in her 20s and not bad looking by any means…but even if I’d been in the mood, it would’ve been pretty embarrassing for me to say in public, “Lady, your problems are solved, my place is a short walk from the bus stop.” And honestly, wouldn’t most of the rest of you guys be turned off by that sort of talk? I mean, she wasn’t in a bar and didn’t have the excuse of being drunk. It made me suspect that perhaps she wasn’t right in the head, because normal sane women don’t go begging for sex in public.
[quote=“Quentin”][quote=“finley”]
Anyway, I think Quentin’s point that he was put off by the question itself[/quote]
About a month or so ago I was waiting at the bus stop and this girl sitting next to me started going off about how long it had been since she’d been laid. Now, if I’d been the only other person around, it would have been unmistakeable why she would have brought the subject up But as there were several other people around, it seemed an odd thing to be loudly complaining about in public and bringing up as a conversation starter with complete strangers. “Yeah, I have my vibrator, but that’s not good enough…what I really get off on is the hugging, kissing, touching, skin on skin, the touching and intimacy.” A pretty average looking woman, in her 20s and not bad looking by any means…but even if I’d been in the mood, it would’ve been pretty embarrassing for me to say in public, “Lady, your problems are solved, my place is a short walk from the bus stop.” And honestly, wouldn’t most of the rest of you guys be turned off by that sort of talk? I mean, she wasn’t in a bar and didn’t have the excuse of being drunk. It made me suspect that perhaps she wasn’t right in the head, because normal sane women don’t go begging for sex in public.[/quote]
Surely, surely she was talking on the phone via one of those almost invisable bluetooth deals, or something. You know, chatting with her girlfriend about the drought and forgetting where she was? Otherwise, yeah she had to have been just a little off. Or way WAY loose.
I agree. Not exclusively to male strangers, but to strangers in general. I don’t know if you’ve heard about “Jin Guangdang” some kind of notorious scam in Taiwan. Anyway there are too many such or similar scams being reported in Taiwan. So many people tend to stay cautious when some strangers approach them.
“I also do not understand why people still claim, despite all the evidence to the contrary, that Taiwan is a heaven for white guys trying to pick up women.”
I don’t know how some of the guys on here have trouble meeting women in Taiwan. Maybe when you say pick up you mean strictly one night stands. It is oh so easy for me, and not that easy in the US. You have to put in a little time, but not that much and no grand romantic gestures or high bar tabs need be accumulated. If you want a one night stand you might be out of luck. I never run that game, but as far as getting a girlfriend, you can get a smoking hot well educated one with very little work.
There are basically three reasons western guys come to Taiwan(in my experience):
1.Women
2.Anime
3.Martial arts
4.Learn Chinese for business/military career
I went for the 4th and was more than happy with the amount of 1 and 3 that piled on to me without much effort at all on my part.
“I also do not understand why people still claim, despite all the evidence to the contrary, that Taiwan is a heaven for white guys trying to pick up women.”
Maybe a few of these guys were having no luck at all back home, heard it was easy here, and came over… but hey, you still do need chatting-up skills, its just the bar is a lot lower here… but thats not to say there is no bar at all…
I think the only real Heaven with the 72 virgins for every guy is limited to a certain religion…
[quote=“Johnwilliamson062”]There are basically three reasons western guys come to Taiwan(in my experience):
1.Women
2.Anime
3.Martial arts
4.Learn Chinese for business/military career
[/quote]
People come here to work or study Chinese. Unless they are self-supporting, the others aren’t an option and in any case most have no idea what taiwan is like before they arrive. The notion people are committing a year or two of their lives to live someone they have barely heard of for the promise of women they know nothing about is fanciful at best.
[quote=“Mucha Man”][quote=“Johnwilliamson062”]There are basically three reasons western guys come to Taiwan(in my experience):
1.Women
2.Anime
3.Martial arts
4.Learn Chinese for business/military career
[/quote]
People come here to work or study Chinese. Unless they are self-supporting, the others aren’t an option and in any case most have no idea what taiwan is like before they arrive. The notion people are committing a year or two of their lives to live someone they have barely heard of for the promise of women they know nothing about is fanciful at best.[/quote]
Well, there do seem to be an awful lot who come because of a woman - a Taiwanese wife or girlfriend that they met in their home country. So number 1 doesn’t seem so far off.
But in that case … housecat is basically right. Personally I hate bars - you can barely hear yourself think anyway. Erudite conversation is pretty much impossible.
but also because I don’t think my own techniques would work very well for others. I would never try chatting to a pretty girl in a museum. Well, that’s not exactly true but I would never approach any girl in a public place without some kind of a sign that she was interested in me. I would want 
