It’s refreshing that you both have a totally open and honest relationship. In many cases this sort of information wouldn’t be shared, unless there was some reason to share.
2 Likes
What a great opportunity/excuse to lower the frequency of visits
2 Likes
I find a lot of these cranky old gits talk shit and try to stir up drama because they’re so useless and bored. It’s pathetic behavior, really. They need a hobby.
8 Likes
thats why you learn chinese 
so they can switch to taiwanese when they want to talk crap about you 
8 Likes
Drama only gets stirred up if somebody passes it on.
1 Like
it’s always old people too lmao
I feel you…we’ll work something out
I would say old people bring up this kind of stuff like they’re swatting flies or something, I wouldn’t sweat it. At least they didn’t complain you’re a foreigner! Baby steps 
They’re being nice to you right? It doesn’t always work that way. Focus on the positive. What do you want to be your wife’s parents best friend? That’s nice when it happens, but it doesn’t always work out that way. As long as your wife and you are on the same page–again, as long as you and your wife are on the same page–you can laugh this stuff off with her. Why create problems where they don’t exist, I say. Andrew gives the best advice above IMO
Make sure your wife is adequately supported and no one will listen to old people prattling on.
5 Likes
i’d say being disrespected for no good reason by your in-laws is a problem. especially if you wouldn’t stand for your own parents doing it to your wife.
So what are you going to do. Talk it over with them? LOL. Good luck.
1 Like
Who would tell their spouse that their in-laws were disrespecting them about something they had no control over? That seems much more of an issue to me.
Why did the OP’s spouse feel it necessary to tell the OP that her parents had an issue with his parents separating? There’s nothing the OP can do about it as far as I can tell. What was the point?
3 Likes
It seems unnecessary in a way, but as you said (I think) totally open communication in a marriage is great too. What might be a bad idea is making a big deal out of it and potentially creating a wedge between you and your wife where one didn’t exist. Maybe his wife just doesn’t think it’s a big deal. Old people are expected to say this kind of thing here, it’s practically de rigeur and locals get it too. I mean, if they’re running you down to everyone from second Aunt Mary to the counter guy at the 7, that’s one thing. If treat you like crap at every opportunity, that’s something too. But I don’t see indications that that is happening.
1 Like
Well she knows I don’t like people talking about me behind my back and that I’d be more upset if she never told me and I found out somehow. Honestly we do tell each other basically everything so I don’t really see it as a big deal that she told me. We talked a lot about my parents before we married and she doesn’t care that they are separated
You must be a CEO and drive a Falali. And even then, all foreigners are the same.
4 Likes
Thats why I became a CEO in my 20s. They don’t need to know I remain a thousandaire.
3 Likes
OK, hypothetically if a foreign husband’s parents (aged approx. 80) consider his Taiwanese wife to be grumpy and miserable - should he relay that information to her?
i’d make it clear to my wife that she needs to stick up for me. and i’d do the same for her. i think its a pretty basic thing in a relationship.
if you marry someone who lets their parents openly talk shit about you that could lead to all sorts of problems. how about when you have kids?
There are too many variables to say. I don’t know that there’s any “should” about it.
But you’re assuming she didn’t. What do you want her to do?
I’m half Taiwanese and my Mom’s side is Taiwanese (obviously). My grandparents hated my Dad but progressively over time have come to love him. It really just takes time, you have to put in effort to learn about their culture, try your hardest to learn a little Chinese etc. Wearing them down over time is how to do it. Sitting them down and explaining that your hurt will only lead them to talk more shit as they did previously. Now it’s on you to do a good job convincing. Also do’t take it to heart. Typically, old Taiwanese are bored so they just bitch about stuff for the sake of having something to do. Like my Grandma deadass picks on my Grandpa for eating too much just cuz she’s bored lmao
4 Likes
and that’s NT$ 
5 Likes