I’ve been talking to this girl from Foreign Affair for a while now. I was thinking of pursuing her but I’m not so sure if she’s into me. She’s pretty and sweet. We share the same opinion on things together. It’s quite surprising since we only meet online but the connection we have is overwhelming.
I’m 27 years old but I never had a girlfriend before so I really don’t have much experience. We’ve had some pretty great conversations, and we’ve exchanged really sweet words. We talk a lot, almost everyday. But I’m not hundred percent sure if she likes me or not. I have this feeling that she might not be interested in me.
I want to know what to do. Should I wait until she tells me that she’s not into me or should I just ask her? Should I just pursue her even if I think she’s not into me? Maybe my gut feeling is wrong. Maybe she’s into me too. I need the advice of others on what my next step would be. I like her and I want to be with her. I don’t want my doubts to stop me. Help please!!!
There you go. You said it yourself.
Just go for it.
You live maybe 80 years on this planet. Don’t squander them wondering “what if”.
Invite her for coffee or tea to get to know her more.
Or invite her for lunch or dinner
Then magic you can send flowers.
It’s been twenty years now but my foreign affair worked out fine. I say throw caution to the wind and go for the girl. After all what’s the worst that can happen? Maybe you end up with a ball and chain tied to your ankle and fading memories of the joys of single life but there are worse fates in life.
Getting blown off because you misread the signs is just a normal part of being male. Don’t worry about it; at least you’re not (say) working in the same office so there’s no chance of awkwardness in the case of a ‘no thanks’. However in this case I’d say you’ve got a 90% chance of ‘yes please’ if you just ask her out for coffee or whatever. Just go for it, but be careful not to suffocate the girl with declarations of undying love (see below).
I won’t ask what on earth you’ve been doing for the last 10 years, but just bear this in mind: if you still have your training wheels on, the chances of a long and happy relationship here are fairly slim. Don’t get too emotionally invested in it unless she turns out to be a patient teacher (if she does, you’re very lucky). Keep a careful eye on yourself to see where you screw up, and make corrections accordingly.
If you have a good friend or relative who’s been there, done that, see if you can chat with him sometimes about girl stuff and get some advice. He won’t necessarily be right, but he’ll be able to give you some pointers.
All I have to say is the best advice I was ever given was make my indications clear right off the bat. Nothing worst than making someone guess or finding out yourself months down the road if she likes you or not. You can literally save so much time and energy doing so vs both parties having to guess. Literally saying hey I like you off the bat is better than these unclear messages although there are more clever ways of doing it.
What he said. Learning how to express clearly, confidently, and respectfully what you think, and what you want, is a very useful life skill.
Oy vey… you’re 27 and never been in a relationship? At this point what do you have to lose? Worst case scenario she rejects you and it’s back to your status quo. If I were in your shoes, I’d stop caring at this point and just go for broke.
As my granny always said, “shit or get off the pot.”
Perhaps not the best metaphor for a possible relationship? In any case, the OP should just go for it. What have you got to lose (except for your virginity)?
I wonder if he’s more scared of her saying yes than her saying no.
Don’t spook the poor guy! He’s nervous enough as it is. Do you not want him to make the love connection?
Is “Foreign Affair” the name of some romance website? Are OP and the girl he likes in the same country?
Get this poor guy a Mrs Robinson stat!
I assumed she was in the Foreign Affairs department. Uh-oh…looks like we may have been punked…
Eh. I’m kind of indifferent tbh. Whatever outcome makes for a more entertaining thread is fine by me.
You horrible, horrible man! What happened in your life to beat you down and make you so cynical?
Hey, I’m married with a baby. My entertainment options are limited to this or NetFlix. And lately this is winning.
Good god, no wonder. My sympathies. But if you start enjoying the programming too much, we may have to start charging you.