Aw geez Notsu, it wasn’t a puerile request really, You see I’m an Australian and aside from “baa baa baby”, my only other knowledge of foreplay is, “you awake, love?”
HG
What? I could have sworn I showed you my tattoos.
What? I could have sworn I showed you my tattoos.[/quote]
Sandman!!! You promised not to tell anyone!!! 
[quote=“Mordeth”]I’m going to tackle the physicals of “what turns a man on”…
In no particular order…
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small amount of dirty talk…or just pleasurable moans from the woman (we like to hear that we’re doing something right).
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Tongue in orifice (ear, anus…probably not nose though).
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Masturbation on the girls part. One of the sexiest thing a girl did to me was put her fingers in my mouth to moisten them…and then proceed to stimulate herself clitorally. This is also a big turn on for the man because he gets to watch a girl masturbate while having sex. Girls will have a better sexually experience if they stimulate themself from the outside while the male stimulates from the inside…kinda like when a man masturbates while his girlfriend licks his crack…or outside of anus.
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finger in man’s anus is stimulating and interesting to most men (not too often though, maybe every 4th time…or something).
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A willingness to show one’s body during sex…but shyness before and after.
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69 is a good position that isn’t used enough…or if you don’t like being “eaten” at least position yourself over his face so he has a nice view while oral is being performed on him.
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A man worth having sex with will be more turned on by your re-actions to his actions than by his own actions. So if he does something you like be sure to let him know. A girls groan of pleasure will make me cum faster than most other things (similiar to #1).
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Get on top…the man does most of the work and the girl just lies there most of the time…give the guy a break…hop on top and work those abdominals. When on top keep the back straight as opposed to leaning over him…gives him a nice view of your chest.
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Oral sex during non-sexual times…for example he’s watching TV…walk up and just start the oral sex…it’s very tidy and shouldn’t mess the couch. And it’s one of the sexiest things a girl can do.
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A girl once said to me “Can we try it from behind again?” (we’d only done it once before)…that was pretty darn sexy.
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Back to oral sex…you need to suck…you need to suck hard…you aren’t going to hurt it. Imagine you are trying to get a really thick milkshake up a straw…an open mouth going back and forth provides visual stimulation, but little physical. Suck hard.
12.Fingers through hair is nice.
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Play with your own chest as if you are so turned on you just have to touch yourself.
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When the man is trying to fall asleep, but you want to have sex…don’t start to cuddle…or kiss at his face. Someone pecking at my face while I’m trying to fall asleep is NOT sexy…it’s annoying. If the man is trying to fall asleep…or is already asleep…just go straight to the oral sex…that will get his attention in a very positive manor. You don’t need to finish the job…but do it long enough to get him hard then stop…he won’t be able to go to sleep then and you will get the intercourse you wanted .
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Err, there are probably more…but I think I’m going to go have sex now…[/quote]
Yes, yes, yes, this is all true…BUT it still basically comes down to a woman taking off her clothes while her lover watches. Naked is good. Men are visual, very visual.
On a side note, the whole sexual attraction thing is quite ridiculous if you think about it. For some reason I can’t fathom, we don’t think about it. We feel it. I won’t pretend to understand why a neck, face, back, vagina, butt, legs, feet, hands, arms, breasts, etc. can be endlessly fascinating to a man, even when said body parts belong to the same woman he’s been with for years, but the fact is, they are fascinating. Endlessly. Thank God for that, I suppose.[/i]
- Don’t mother them in public. Meaning don’t correct them or talk deaming toward them.
- Let them be themselves.
- They are simple creatures. Don’t expect them to read your mind. Just say it or spell it out. Put the cards on the table.
4)Don’t nag them
5)Appreciate them for who they are and let them know that you do
6)Don’t talk to him during his football/hockey/baseball/basketball game. He’s actually working out things in his mind
7)Make sure you do upkeep. Meaning, once in a relationship don’t stop wearing the things or doing the things that made him attracted to you in the first place
8)Let them know when you are ‘ranting’ and when you need advice. Guys IMO like to fix things, not dwell on stuff.
9)Keep somethings of yourself a mystery. Guys don’t care to know every little detail of our lives, or what we always have on our minds. - Don’t bother asking what he’s thinking after sex. He’s thinking Pizza Hut or Dominos (tongue in cheek)
11)Let them do some chasing. IMO men like a women who’s a little hard to get. But if he has to work every time to get you you lose their interest.
12)pick your battles. - Know who you are and what you want. You’ll fiind that men are attracted to women who aren’t clingy, needy,and possessive. They want to be relied upon, not burdened.
14)Keep a clean house.
Good luck in your search. He’s out there. Go em,girl.
I’ve heard guys go for French Maid outfits. So, scratch the showing up naked thing, and buy yourself a little French maid outfit, you know the sexy little number that I’m talking about . . . . a little lacy white cap, an extremely short button up dress that shows a little ass when you bend down, little white apron, high-heeled pumps, silk stockings and a duster or a riding crop if you wanna get kinky.
Here’s a visual 'cause guys are so visual and all . . . .
A lot of girls here don’t show cleavage in part because they feel uncomfortable with the size of their own breasts or they have an idea that showing cleavage somehow cheapens them. If you’re going to bars or clubs then a little cleavage is fine . . . albeit it does tend to glue men’s minds to that spot . . . one of my favorite short short stories is “Climacteric” and in it there is a bit where they narrator describes the guy looking at his date “the golden corona of her hair, the blue topazes of her eyes, creamy column of neck, her breasts” and the description stops there as men will usually look at your face and then go down and then about ninety percent of them get locked into your breasts and are stuck there. Now, guys won’t overtly look at your boobs (unless you unleash them from the over the shoulder boulder holders but then you probably wouldn’t do that in the first fifteen minutes or in a public place unless you happen to be that sort of girl but then you wouldn’t be asking what turns guys on in a forum like this if you were . . . but they will take peeks. There’s a great episode of Penn & Teller’s “Bullshit” (the actual name of the show for those unfamiliar with it) where they put a hidden camera in the cleavage (it pretty much looked like a button) of an attractive woman and sent her out to do on-the-street interviews with people. When you look at the boob cam it is so obvious that most of the men are sneaking peeks at her cleavage, even though they are trying hard to be polite and appear that they are just answering questions . . . only a couple looked openly but all of them were most definately attracted to her cleavage. When she wore and outfit that showed a little more cleavage then more men agreed to answer questions while the no-cleavage outfit got fewer positive responses.
Don’t go topless on a first date . . . but an outfit that accents your positive physical traits will go a long way.
Another little “trick of the trade” is to slightly tilt your head to the side when speaking to him. Look into his eyes but very slightly tilt the head to the side. A study in the US (can’t remember the exact one) found that men found women in photographs to be much more sexually attractive when their heads were tilted slightly to the side. As Desmond Morris would put it, this posture is a sign of interest in a particular male.
Of course, attracting a potential mate is a whole lot different than getting one hot and heavy and ready to do the nasty nasty. If you’re already in a relationship, it’s a lot easier to gauge it. With most guys just look at 'em a certain way, touch 'em and begin nuzzling and start the little kisses and they’ll be good to go. With a new partner who you are wishing to attract, then you need to watch the feedback loop for attraction interaction.
While some of the articles here http://briandavidphillips.typepad.com/brian/hypnosis_erotic_and_sexual/index.html are not appropriate for new relationships, there are a couple essays in the list that deal with how we anchor or condition one another for responsiveness that you might find helpful. Pretty much everyone has certain shortcuts to their sexual response. We build in our own circuits to respond to a lover almost automatically. With a little skill, one can learn to recognize arousal states, set anchors to them, and then fire those anchors when desired.
All the best,
Brian
On the topic of looking at women’s breasts.
I started losing my hair awhile back. And when talking with people I would notice when they would look at my hair line. Their eyes would flick up to it for a fraction of a second then come back down to my eyes.
My hair line and my eyes are pretty darn close to one another…especially in comparison to my chest to eyes.
The point is every time you take a 1/4 of a second glance at someone’s chest with whom you are talking to…they notice. Some men don’t realize that.
Good observation Mordeth, but wait till that line creaps way back. Suddenly you get all jumpy cos you think there’s something flying out of the sky behind ya. I suppose the analogy for a large and droopy breatsed woman would be somethijng rearing up fast from below.
I’m a committed admirer of zee ass, it allows for more subtle and lengthier consideration. But sweep, never stare.
HG
I remember an episode from Seinfeld when George was oggling at some girl’s breasts and it was pretty obvious so Jerry told him, “George, it’s like staring into the sun. You can’t look too long. You just glance long enough to get an impression of them. Then look away. Look away.” Or something to that effect.
Awhile ago I read that staring at breasts has a calming effect and since I tend to be rather a nervous person I decided that when I was out and about I would try to shift my gaze directly from one set of breasts to another. So far I would say that it has certainly helped with the nervous thing but I keep leaving puddles everywhere I go so I dunno.
oh bob, remember to clean up after you mess yourself.
How big do the breast have to be to calm you? And the bigger they are the more zen you become?
Any size is fine so long as they are of a nice shape, and the bras women wear around here pretty much guarantee a nice shape so I’m like “oomm…” pretty much all the time actually.
Man, and here I thought I did it because the right side of my brain weighed more than my left side or that I just heard things better from one ear than from the other. I have cocked my head to the side to listen to people, according to my mother, ever since I was old enough for my neck to support my head. I thought it always made me look like the RCA Victor dog…nice to know that Desmond Morris thinks it makes me look more attractive. Tell him I said the same back at him. I’d be his “Naked Ape” anytime…grrrowl!
Any size is fine so long as they are of a nice shape, and the bras women wear around here pretty much guarantee a nice shape so I’m like “oomm…” pretty much all the time actually.[/quote]
That’s because they’re premolded, breaking at least 5 laws of physics (including one about matter, or in this case ample cleavage, cannot be instantaneously created). Personally, I think a natural shape would be more preferrable to a supernatural one, but that’s just me.
[quote=“ImaniOU”][quote=“meiguolangren”]
That’s because they’re premolded, breaking at least 5 laws of physics (including one about matter, or in this case ample cleavage, cannot be instantaneously created). Personally, I think a natural shape would be more preferrable to a supernatural one, but that’s just me.[/quote][/quote]
A comment that I started using…and a few of my other geek friends took up is when we see an amazingly beautiful girl…we say “Wow…she’s comic book.” Because the most beautiful women in the world…are drawn.
The most beautiful women in the world are those best loved by their men. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. And I guarantee that a woman glows when basking in the adoring gaze of her lover.
dear kneezah,
just wanted to chime in with my 2 cents worth on your question of what turns men on. i am a man.
what drives me crazy is when a girl wears her hair a different way every day. one day she has it in braids, the next day she has a ponytail, and the next day she has it back in barrettes. this drives me nuts. it is so sexy i cant even believe it. i dont know what it is.
for all those girls out there who change their hair each day, we men do notice, so please keep it up.
john
Genuine kindness mixed with a good helping of chutzpah turns me on.
That, and a nice ass.
EXACTLY!! You hit it right on the spot!!! so many girls don’t know to SUCK hard, they just move their mouth up and down the shaft. Don’t they know it’s called SUCKING dick for a reason?? SUCK SUCK SUCK!!!