Never thought I'd have these feelings again

Life Dating & Relationships
#1

I met my “first love” when I was 18. We dated off and on for the next few years. We feel out of touch for a few years then started talking on the phone and she even came out to Taiwan to see if we could make it work again, it didn’t work out. But we are still close.

She was the most perfect girl I’ve ever met. And dating her really destroyed my love life. Since no girl even came close to comparing with her. She is a Doctor/Ballerina/Model with the body of a stripper…and that’s hard to compete with. So those feelings that you get…when you really really like a girl (butterflies in the stomach…etc), I never feel them anymore. I go from girlfriend to girlfriend…with no feelings of love. Just feelings of a nice friend who I sometimes have sex with…I say sometimes because without the intense attraction…there isn’t a huge sex drive either.

So I haven’t felt any intensity in the last 12 years except for when I’ve been with my ex…until now.

I went on a blind date with a girl. And it might not have been “love at first sight”, but it was pretty damn close. We had our date on Sunday. It’s Wednesday now and we’ve already discussed moving in together. I have butterflies in my stomach…and my emotions are bouncing from laughter to near tears every few minutes.

This love stuff is scary as hell. And since she lives about 4 hours away by train :help: . I know that my emotions are only going to get crazier. She is going to spend every weekend at my house. Since she lives with her family I can’t stay with her. But this coming weekend she works on the Sunday…and there is no way in hell I’m going to wait an extra week to see her. So I’ll be borrowing money (I’m broke) and driving down to get a hotel near her house. My last girlfriend lived 15 minutes away from my house and I never went to see her…because I was too lazy. For this new girl I’d ride a bicycle if I had to.

Man oh man, I hope my stomach settles down soon. Time has slowed down since I met her as well…every day is dragging on. Just counting the minutes until the weekend. I’m already considering selling my “big bike” since it’s mainly a solo bike. And I ride it on the weekends…and that’s “her” time.

Sorry, I’m babbling. I just never thought I’d feel “head over heels” passion again in my life. And I’m feeling it now…and it’s scary. Ok…think I’m going to go throw-up now…isn’t infatuation grand?

#2

[quote=“Mordeth”]I met my “first love” when I was 18. We dated off and on for the next few years. We feel out of touch for a few years then started talking on the phone and she even came out to Taiwan to see if we could make it work again, it didn’t work out. But we are still close.

She was the most perfect girl I’ve ever met. And dating her really destroyed my love life. Since no girl even came close to comparing with her. She is a Doctor/Ballerina/Model with the body of a stripper…and that’s hard to compete with. So those feelings that you get…when you really really like a girl (butterflies in the stomach…etc), I never feel them anymore. I go from girlfriend to girlfriend…with no feelings of love. Just feelings of a nice friend who I sometimes have sex with…I say sometimes because without the intense attraction…there isn’t a huge sex drive either.

So I haven’t felt any intensity in the last 12 years except for when I’ve been with my ex…until now.

I went on a blind date with a girl. And it might not have been “love at first sight”, but it was pretty damn close. We had our date on Sunday. It’s Wednesday now and we’ve already discussed moving in together. I have butterflies in my stomach…and my emotions are bouncing from laughter to near tears every few minutes.

This love stuff is scary as hell. And since she lives about 4 hours away by train :help: . I know that my emotions are only going to get crazier. She is going to spend every weekend at my house. Since she lives with her family I can’t stay with her. But this coming weekend she works on the Sunday…and there is no way in hell I’m going to wait an extra week to see her. So I’ll be borrowing money (I’m broke) and driving down to get a hotel near her house. My last girlfriend lived 15 minutes away from my house and I never went to see her…because I was too lazy. For this new girl I’d ride a bicycle if I had to.

Man oh man, I hope my stomach settles down soon. Time has slowed down since I met her as well…everyday is dragging on. Just counting the minutes until the weekend. I’m already considering selling my “big bike” since it’s mainly a solo bike. And I ride it on the weekends…and that’s “her” time.

Sorry, I’m babbling. I just never thought I’d feel “head over heels” passion again in my life. And I’m feeling it now…and it’s scary. Ok…think I’m going to go throw-up now…isn’t infatuation grand?[/quote]
Heh. That’s what happened when I first met my wife. It was like being struck by lightning. :lovestruck: Go for it! Live deliberately, love deliberately. And congratulations. :bravo:

#3

I was winding up for my first sarcastic response of the day, but that’s so damn cute I just couldn’t – 'aint nothing wrong with reverting to a 14-year-old once in a while. Oops, that didn’t come out quite right. I meant you going back to a 14-year-old. No, I mean you become a 14-year-old again. Yes, that’s it. I think.

Congratulations Mordeth, but I’d hold off on selling the bike for a bit. :wink:

Well whaddaya know? That’s what happened when I met your wife too.

#4

Lighting
Love
Sight
Yowzaa!

That’s how it was with Mrs. Jdsmith too.

Fear not in love/ The magic will still be there in the morning.

#5

As long as she is. :wink:

#6

As long as she is. :wink:[/quote]

Well, yeah, that helps. :slight_smile:

#7

Mordeth,
I’m happy for you mate. I hope it works out just fine for the two of you. Makes me happy to hear someone else has found love. Great feeling, isn’t it?

HOWEVER,

I agree with Sandman.

Why don’t you rather go from a ‘solo’ bike to a ‘duet’ :smiling_imp: bike? You love bikes, don’t give’em up mate. You’ll regret it later.

Stanley (I think therefore I am… in love with… I can’t say her name here :raspberry: )

#8

Congrats Mordeth.
Lay into it. Love in the summer time can be a grand thing.
Smiling eyes in sunshine, soft whisper in the dark.
Long walks on the beach… - oh wait -…thats for that other thread.
Enjoy man, enjoy.

#9

Yep, we are pretty damn disgusting…We talk on the phone every night for hours and hours. And then at the end of the conversation we do the whole “No, you hang up first…No, you hang up first…” thing… :help:

Just found out my roommate knows the town where she lives. He says he can do it in 2.5 hours in the car. That’s good news :bravo: .

#10

Where is she now? :smiling_imp:

#11

Mordeth is planning to move, I guess.

4 hours away… Hmmm…

#12

Have you fornicated yet? I’m serious – when you know it is the right one – how fast or how slow do you think it is appropriate to go?

#13

Have you fornicated yet? I’m serious – when you know it is the right one – how fast or how slow do you think it is appropriate to go?[/quote]

Well, the general rule is: Relationships that start with sex don’t go past that. And relationships that start as friends and then develope have a much more “real” base for growth.

With my “First Love” back when I was 18 we had sex on the 2nd date. And it didn’t slow down the passion at all. But we were young. With my last girlfriend we had sex on the 4th or 5th date…and because I wasn’t very attracted to her…I felt that it was moving too fast. I hadn’t yet built up an attraction to her based on her personality…and then when she allowed me to go all the way…my attraction for her lowered a bit. If we had waited longer…I could have developed a more healthy attraction to her as a person…making the sex more enjoyable.

So, I’d say unless you’re extremly attracted to someone…sex to soon will hinder the passion and growth in the relationship. But if you are crazy about them right off the bat…then something like sex shouldn’t hurt the passion.

#14

Sometimes you just have to turn off the upper thinking department and let the lower department do its job.

#15

Get a grip man ! You’re willing to give up your bike for a woman ? :loco: What has she done to your brain ? I thought your bike was your first and only love :lovestruck:

#16

Well, yeah, but now it’s already been three days. You’re long past the start of the relationship. What are you waiting for? :wink:

#17

Well, yeah, but now it’s already been three days. You’re long past the start of the relationship. What are you waiting for? :wink:[/quote]

Well if you reread the post where that quote comes from I don’t actually say whether I had sex with her or not. I talk about how it affects things. And I talk about some of my ex’s. But I think discussing your sex life about a girl you are presently with is crass.

#18

Curious: those of you said that you experienced what Mordeth is going through…what do you mean? Do you feel you felt the same way? Or that things progressed just as quickly? Or both?

When I have experienced quick, intense passion in the past, they were truly wonderful experiences in their own ways, but they weren’t awfully intimate on a consistent, constant, daily basis over a long period of time, so I curious to hear from others. When you met your wife/girlfriend, if you were truly infatuated at a very quick speed, how did things go after that, if you are still together? Do things shift? If so, how do they shift?

#19

[quote=“Jubom”]Curious: those of you said that you experienced what Mordeth is going through…what do you mean? Do you feel you felt the same way? Or that things progressed just as quickly? Or both?

When I have experienced quick, intense passion in the past, they were truly wonderful experiences in their own ways, but they weren’t awfully intimate on a consistent, constant, daily basis over a long period of time, so I curious to hear from others. When you met your wife/girlfriend, if you were truly infatuated at a very quick speed, how did things go after that, if you are still together? Do things shift? If so, how do they shift?[/quote]
Went just fine for me. 15 years and I’m still infatuated :wink:. Of course things have changed – you become more familiar, more comfortable around each other, less likely to wish to “test the limits” if you like, but as long the mutual respect and love remain, any problems can be overcome, at least in our experience.

#20

[quote=“sandman”][quote=“Jubom”]Curious: those of you said that you experienced what Mordeth is going through…what do you mean? Do you feel you felt the same way? Or that things progressed just as quickly? Or both?

When I have experienced quick, intense passion in the past, they were truly wonderful experiences in their own ways, but they weren’t awfully intimate on a consistent, constant, daily basis over a long period of time, so I curious to hear from others. When you met your wife/girlfriend, if you were truly infatuated at a very quick speed, how did things go after that, if you are still together? Do things shift? If so, how do they shift?[/quote]
Went just fine for me. 15 years and I’m still infatuated :wink:. Of course things have changed – you become more familiar, more comfortable around each other, less likely to wish to “test the limits” if you like, but as long the mutual respect and love remain, any problems can be overcome, at least in our experience.[/quote]

Aaaah… It’s nice to see there’s a softy and a romantic under that loud, rough exterior :slight_smile: