You’ve led a sheltered life, my friend, if you’ve never hung with beer swillin’ rodeo cowboys.
If we can define ‘beer’ as the contents of a container so labelled, then I think I can one up you here. I’ll just mention that not all cowboys swaller theys Copenhagen, and leave it at that. Some here may be eatin’ breakfast. [/quote]
Mention of rodeo clowns / cowboys without citing “Shakes the Clown” or making a reference to cocaine = -100 pts.
Swallowing Copenhagen = 1000 pts. on a scale of 1/10
7-Eleven now has their own brand, The Beer, made by a Suntory subsidiary in Guangdong. Worst ever and I was expecting the worst. Like drinking spoiled milk at gunpoint.
You’ve led a sheltered life, my friend, if you’ve never hung with beer swillin’ rodeo cowboys.
If we can define ‘beer’ as the contents of a container so labelled, then I think I can one up you here. I’ll just mention that not all cowboys swaller theys Copenhagen, and leave it at that. Some here may be eatin’ breakfast. [/quote]
Oh man, you just brought up some bad memories. Grabbed a beer one night, started to swig it down and realized someone had used it as their spit cup, immediate projectile vomit. Then not five minutes after saw a disgruntled ex-husband shoot his wife and her boyfriend followed by him getting shot by the 5.0s… Terrible night,and the story doesn’t end there.
…and that’s about when the flattest, oldest, warmest PBR tastes just great, when you really want to get rid of THAT taste.
That’s the kinda irony that makes you homesick, don’t it?
Kinda like if yer hangin’ out with rednecks and suddenly you smell fresh Skoal. Those with dry feet/socks/boots have learned to pick their feet up no questions asked. Those who just think hey, somebody opened a fresh tin don’t that smell good?- are the ones who have to learn the hard way that lingerin’ fresh Skoal means that somebody kicked over a spit cup somewhere and tsunami of used Skoal is soon to pool around their feet.
I think probably the worst beer of all must be smoked beer / Rauchbier. You don’t have to grab the wrong bottle by mistake like Jimi. Instead you can get that lovely ashtray flavor from this rather traditional (especially in Frankonia) sort of beer:
The most famous “Aecht Schlenkerla Rauchbier” is truly disgusting in my opinion, and I didn’t dare to try the associated proverb that only after the third 0.5l glass that beer tastes good.
I dare say this beats all the not so great tasting beers you have ever had
I remember my step-father’s first attempt at home brew.
The more sugar you add, the higher the alcohol content will be. :discodance:
It seemed like a good idea at the time.
The only thing that might be worse is Chibuku, a beer from Malawi.
I recall walking by a store with about twenty shitfaced guys all drinking from milk cartons. I had to check that out. It’s kind of like beer gruel. Chibuku is also called “shake-shake” because you have to shake it up before drinking. :lick:
[quote=“zender”]I remember my step-father’s first attempt at home brew.
The more sugar you add, the higher the alcohol content will be. :discodance:
It seemed like a good idea at the time.
The only thing that might be worse is Chibuku, a beer from Malawi.
I recall walking by a store with about twenty shitfaced guys all drinking from milk cartons. I had to check that out. It’s kind of like beer gruel. Chibuku is also called “shake-shake” because you have to shake it up before drinking. :lick:[/quote]
Hey, remember that Schlitz malt liquor called Red Bull that we used to get at AsiaWorld? Like 8% or something, NT$17 a can? THAT was pretty beastly, man.
After one can it was more like being stoned from huffing gas than drunk…
There’s only one beer out there I was actually AFRAID to try.
[quote]To make Cock Ale
Take ten gallons of ale, and a large cock, the older the better, parboil the cock, flea him, and stamp him in a stone mortar till his bones are broken, (you must craw and gut him when you flea him) put the cock into two quarts of sack, and put to it three pounds of raisins of the sun stoned, some blades of mace, and a few cloves; put all these into a canvas bag, and a little before you find the ale has done working, put the ale and bag together into a vessel; in a week or nine days’ time bottle it up, fill the bottles but just above the necks, and leave the same time to ripen as other ale.[/quote]
[quote=“zender”]I remember my step-father’s first attempt at home brew.
The more sugar you add, the higher the alcohol content will be. :discodance:
It seemed like a good idea at the time.
The only thing that might be worse is Chibuku, a beer from Malawi.
I recall walking by a store with about twenty shitfaced guys all drinking from milk cartons. I had to check that out. It’s kind of like beer gruel. Chibuku is also called “shake-shake” because you have to shake it up before drinking. :lick:[/quote]
You should try the home brew they make in those parts. Makes Chibuku taste like a slice of heaven.
As an impromptu ‘reward’ for helping an old bloke set up some sheep yards (and then round up and tail his lambs), I was given a hot can of West End Export, which had been sitting in the sun in a box on the back of his ute. I guess the day was about 34 degrees C. After one taste I was quite willing to turf it but my ‘host’ took a mouthful of his own, screwed up his face a little and said, ‘I’ve had hotter beer than this before, I tell ya’. So we drank it.
This thread reminds me of a joke that goes, ‘A guy walks into a bar under a sign that says “Billiards Beer” and he asks the bartender for some billiards beer. So the bartender takes a mug and goes in the office and pees in it. Then he serves it to the guy who drinks it all and asks for some more billiards beer. And the bartender takes his mug and goes into the back room and pees into it. Then he serves it to the guy who drinks it all up…’
Coors, Miller, bar beer, Blue Girl, Fosters (in UK) are all piss water…having said that, I can drink pretty much any beer in a can or a bottle. It’s the dodgy tap beers served in some pubs that I can’t drink.
There was some no alcohol stuff called, I think, Kaliber that they flogged in motorway service stations in the Yook in the early eighties, which I tried a couple of times, because, thought of as “beer” its price wasn’t as offensive as the other beverage offerings there.
Tasted pretty vile, but the clincher was that, by some miracle of biotechnology, it seemed to be able to administer a crashing hangover without getting you in any way relaxed.
All (in fact, more) of the pain, and none of the pleasure. Pure genius.
My absolute least favourite beer is Heineken, then Taiwan beer, although I do have to give them credit for at least having a flavour, even if I don’t like it. The Americans probably make some of the least value for money with Budweiser at the top.
I really can’t stand Heineken though. It makes my mouth taste like I threw up in it and swallowed it back down again.
Well, if we’re allowed “worst beer-assisted situation” that widens the scope quite a bit, though the very worst ones tend not to be remembered.
Some hospitable Nepalese gave me a pot of millet beer (I tink its called Ch-aang, or something like that) when they put me up in their isolated hut in Sikkhim (They insisted I stay because of the danger of GHOSTS on the path I was taking).
Funny stuff. It came in a metal (I think aluminium) pot, like a big mate pot, filled with wet, fermenting millet seed, and you drank the steeping liquor through an aluminium straw, (instant Alzhiemers) which I guess had a strainer in the bottom. When it was empty of liquid you added more warm water and the seeds fermented some more, so it was like an “everlasting beer”, though of course it got steadily weaker unless it got to sit for a while. Not great, but drinkable at a pinch.
The problem came after lights out when the rats started to move around the hut. They wanted my everlasting beer, and I didn’t want them to have it. I was very tired, but I stayed awake most of the night whacking at rats with a stick. (My hosts, probably at huge inconvenience, had given me a room to myself).
Came the dawn and I didn’t fancy my (now regenerated) everlasting beer much anymore, so I dunno why I bothered. Principle of the thing, I suppose.
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