300

Arts & Sciences Arts & Entertainment
61

How about the Samurai? Why not have Tom Cruise and Ken Watanabe in a love story in the Last Samurai? The samurai also practiced homosexual behavior. Never saw a Kurasawa film with homo samurai so it’s not just Hollywood that repackages history.

The Spartans/Athenians system of training was to pair off a seasoned veteran with a younger male in a mentoring system- a lot more meaningful of a relationship to the young lad than say an altarboy and a Catholic priest. Yep sometimes they shagged each other and even fell in love.

Good Queer roles are few in action cinema- I was just thinking of The Boondock Saints- a film with potential that started hard out of the gates but never finisheed the race- the William Dafoe character who plays the police detective. Although he even calls another character a “fag”. Interesting character too bad it drowned in the middle of the movie.

Maybe the labeling thing Poagao mentioned is true because of cinema’s roots in theater. “Oh he has a mustache and enters the stag /frame from the left-he’s a bad guy. She’s wearing a Kimono/sitting on a bed-she’s a whore. He’s got a big nose and a black hat-he’s a jew. etc.” Maybe it’s just easier to put a badge on someones shoulder before you shuffle them off to the showers?

Maybe Mel Gibson is on to something with his historically based- in your face movies.

I haven’t seen any leading homos in his movies either and I wouldn’t hold my breath.

You all missed the biggest fag in the picture who wasn’t even (we assume in history) a queer. Xerxes.

They portrayed him as a cross dressing love child of Rupaul and Dennis Rodman. No wonder he lost- he was a fag!

(Reminds me of the Lenny Bruce skit-"Oh my god the Lone Ranger’s a fag!)

Surrounded by the Athenian fags in back of them and the Persian homos in front of them what else could a good hetro do.

We fuckin’ kill all then sort 'em out later.

Except the Spartans lost-at least in this movie.

62

OK I just saw it and I definitely think it was a homo movie. All those breasts and only two tits. Lovely tits they were though, nicely framed in the toga like that, and lit with such warm forgiving light. They could have had more scenes like that and fewer shots of guys flexing their muscles and posturing proudly before sticking the knife in, drawing it out, sticking it in, drawing it out etc. Death is so cool looking when it is choreographed like that, quick and free from fear, horror, writhing around in agony and such. I liked the elephants and was sorry to see them tumble from the cliff. All in all I think it was likely funded by the defense department in advance of the military conflicts scheduled with “asia.” There can never be too much meat for the grinder. I noticed too that the nipples were of the Asian variety, large and permanently erect atop firm but less than ample. An indication that asian values have begun to infiltrate and corrupt western culture and values already. Heavy use of steroids and liposuction though, so perhaps there is hope for us yet against the forces of tyranny and mysticism. The largest cod piece of course was reserved for the king and that is a good sign, showing proper deference to the established hierarchy is always a good sign. One wonders though why he didn’t lead his army to the top of the trail when he knew the Persians were coming. Wouldn’t it have been better to fight from the top of the hill rather than stuck in the middle like that. Also, if you throw a spear at a guy who is a hundred yards away isn’t he likely to just step out of the way? Perhaps the King suffered from a masochistic death instinct originating from the years of systematic abuse he suffered as a child. He and the other guy guffawed occassionally of looking forward to dying a good warriors death and one wonders whether when it came if it lived up to their expectancies or did it feel more like a spear in the gut? Definitely an edifying two hours and six minutes at the cinema however. I would recommend the film to anyone brain dead, homosexual or under the age of twelve.

63

Just saw it.

Suckiest bunch of suck that ever sucked.

The Narrarion was laughable.

Xerxes looked ridiculous and his voice was silly.

I was bored of the killing within 15 minutes.

What was good about it? (Except for the breasts of course) (The Female breasts that is :wink: )

64

Bob wrote [quote]OK I just saw it and I definitely think it was a homo movie. [/quote]
i think the correct term is homo-erotic. I’m not 100% sure what it means but I heard it used in a movie review yesterday on the BBC. Every Saturday (Taiwan time) I listen to Mark Kermode’s film reviews on BBC5. Great fun and very addictive. You can download all his reviews. If I don’t pass out in the next 20 minutes, I’ll post a link.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/fivelive/entertainment/kermode.shtml

65

What other movie is “the 300” like? Was it pitched as “Beast-Master, but with a bigger budget?” Or “Alexander vs. the goblin hordes from Lord of the Rings, but filmed dark instead of light”? Or “KISS reunion concert, but with weapons”? Or as “another film based on that Sin City guy’s comic books?”

Apparently many Iranians think that the U.S. put out this movie on purpose, in order to whip up fervor for a U.S. / Iran war. I haven’t seen the movie yet, but felt confident in assuring them that (a) most theater-goers probably didn’t realize that it had anything to do with Iran / Persia, (b) we’ll probably take it about as seriously as Batman, © work on the movie would have had to have started several years ago, (d) they made it because the last Frank Miller comic book - turned -movie, Sin City, made money, so they did this other comic book too, and (e) Americans aren’t exactly seething with a desire for vengeance for Thermopolae. (Alexander took care of that. The actual guy, not the movie.)

66

I enjoyed it for what it was.

Like Frank Miller’s artwork, definite influence here e.g. the chiurrascurro stuff

Lena Headey is to die for. I liked her in the Brothers Grimm.

Seeing the one-eyed guy and hearing his narration, I kept on envisioning LOTR (Faramir, brother to Boromir. At one dramatic narrative point, he was saying something about the “One… [pause]” and I thought Ring.

Thermopylae = Hot Gates. Obvious now, but I never thought about it like that.

Also, despite studying this in school, never realized that the Spartans brought their heloi to battle, although i suppose it makes sense (supply train, servants to make meals, etc.). Certainly didn’t know they also participated in battle, though I suppose a last stand would be exceptional.

The pederasty… maybe people are just joking here, or maybe some don’t realize this was common in pretty much every civilization, whether openly or suppressed. I don’t think the movie had to make a point of it, probably would have been a distraction, maybe it could have been implied in the conversation (to make it seem normal-place as it was). Then again, we don’t know enough about Sparta (they kept no records of their own on this subject that we know of) to confirm that practice.

The line “Eat well, for tonight we dine in Hades.” I would have preferred over the word “Hell”. Totally different connotation. Might as well have said “Valhalla.” The film did appear to incorporate other Spartan phrases e.g. on your shield or with it (giving rise to Victory or Death), only Spartan women give birth to Spartan men.

I like this spartan laconism myself:

Frankly, I’m surprised the Nazis never made a propoganda film based on this tale.

From Wikipedia,

[quote] A strong emphasis was placed on honour and carrying out acts because it was the ‘right thing to do.’ Xenophon wrote about the Spartans as he observed them during an Olympic game:

“An elderly man was trying to find a place to sit and observe the Olympic Games, as he went to each section. All the other Greeks laughed as he tried to make his way through. Some ignored him. Upon entering the Spartan section all the Spartans stood and offered the elderly man their seats. Suddenly the entire stadium applauded. All the Greeks knew what was the right thing to do, but the Spartans were the only ones who did it.” [/quote]

I like the historically accurate attention to detail in certain ways such as the Lambda on the Shields denoting Lacadaemon (Sparta).

but like other historians, I found the east v. west thing troubling and anachronistic (ie Free men of the West v. enslaved, morally dubious easterner “Huns” the whole mysticism and tyranny of the east was laughable.) Cuz the Spartans enslaved the Messenians and other neighbours turning them into the Heloi, and certainly were not democratic by Athenian or modern standards while the Persians were more meritocratic (only Spartan by birth first, then by survival and training next). And the portrayal of Xerxes and Persians, despite being the aggressor and invader, was weird. A worthier opponent could have been made to make the sacrifice that much greater. Instead, there was this whole oriental mysticism BS (like the harem scene).

67

Not that there’s anything wrong with that.[/quote]

Little does Bob know he’s not so far from the truth. The Lakedaemon Hoplite called himself a Homoioi, meaning he was a unit identical (in training, mind, etc.) to his fellow soldier in the formation, or a peer equal to his peers.

68

On the way up they could have gathered a lot of rocks to roll down on the per-asians as well. Surely would have been better military strategy than staying where they were. And maybe there was already a lot of rocks at the top. Did nobody think of that? That’s the first thing that would have occured to me. Of course, they might have gotten hungry and thirsty up there but maybe it would have rained, and they were handy with spears and such they could have lampooned a few ducks flying by or something. Or else why didn’t they steal one of those boats and escape to Las Vegas. Besides I must have missed the harem scene when I went for a piss cuz I didn’t see no harem scene. This whole thing has been disappointing.

69

On second thought perhaps they could have climbed the hill on the other side of the valley. That way when the persians got to the top they could have stood there and thumbed their noses at the whole lot of them from across the skinny valley. Except the ones down on the valley floor of course. They could have rolled rocks down on that lot. Have you ever rolled a big rock off the top of a mountainside? It is an awesome spectacle I can assure you, quite a weapon I imagine too. It’s all tremendously gratifying to contemplate what with all the crushed limbs and skulls and what have you. Per-asians are a monolithic mass, evil through and through and devoid of any goodness whatsoever, so these imaginings are not only acceptable but heroic.

70

It was REALLY good, then it fizzled.

I do think that movie makers should mix characters like comic books do. Aragon coulda put an arrow up Xerxes bunghole from ten thousand yards.

And Rambo…yeah…Rambo.