Why do Mr Underhill’s inane threads garner more interest than my inane threads? Is it because I am a lesser sexual being, or is it because Mr Underhill is black?
Unfortunately for you, TomHill is the best poster on forumosa.
Actually, why ‘unfortunately’? Poor TomHill does not get the benefit of reading TomHill’s posts. It’s like when men say ‘wow, it must be great to be a woman, you can touch breasts every day!’, and it’s really not because you simply don’t appreciate greatness if you are great. Everyone else craps on about Taiwanese ‘girls’ and baking bread and visas. TomHill is sublime.
Anais Nin once said, ‘We don’t see things as they are, but rather as we are.’ There are really only two posts in this thread, but your mind perceives more. Until you can truly see that there are only two posts in this entire thread you will continue to seek the teeth that made the wounds. Your healing can begin, but only once you straddle the divide between boredom and anxiety. Honey and oranges would make for a more soothing bath. But Reiki isn’t for you. That truth has been known to the universe for longer than I care to remember.
[quote=“Buttercup”]
Unfortunately for you, TomHill is the best poster on forumosa.
Actually, why ‘unfortunately’? Poor TomHill does not get the benefit of reading TomHill’s posts. It’s like when men say ‘wow, it must be great to be a woman, you can touch breasts every day!’, and it’s really not because you simply don’t appreciate greatness if you are great. Everyone else craps on about Taiwanese ‘girls’ and baking bread and visas. TomHill is sublime.[/quote]
Profound and eloquent, Ms Buttercup, but I still think it’s because he’s black.
Unfortunately for you, TomHill is the best poster on forumosa.
Actually, why ‘unfortunately’? Poor TomHill does not get the benefit of reading TomHill’s posts. It’s like when men say ‘wow, it must be great to be a woman, you can touch breasts every day!’, and it’s really not because you simply don’t appreciate greatness if you are great. Everyone else craps on about Taiwanese ‘girls’ and baking bread and visas. TomHill is sublime.[/quote]
I have to hand this one over to Abe Lincoln. “You can’t help the poor by being one of them.” I accept the burden of being TomHill with good grace. In my next life I hope to hang out with the re-incarnation of Doris Lessing. We will look back at TomHill with fondness.
I think the fact that ‘visa’ and ‘geezer’ rhyme is more than enough proof of a self healing universe.
Next question!
Why hasn’t Mr Dragonbones shown us his latest oven exploit yet? Where’s the bread, man? Less about Mr Underhill’s astronomy and more about LOAVES.
And what about Taiwanese “girls” anyway? Some of my best students are Taiwanese girls, and I DON’T FUCKING PREP!
Visa also rhymes with Rizzla if you’re drunk enough.
[quote=“jimipresley”][quote=“Buttercup”]
Unfortunately for you, TomHill is the best poster on forumosa.
Actually, why ‘unfortunately’? Poor TomHill does not get the benefit of reading TomHill’s posts. It’s like when men say ‘wow, it must be great to be a woman, you can touch breasts every day!’, and it’s really not because you simply don’t appreciate greatness if you are great. Everyone else craps on about Taiwanese ‘girls’ and baking bread and visas. TomHill is sublime.[/quote]
Profound and eloquent, Ms Buttercup, but I still think it’s because he’s black.[/quote]
I question my own blackness from time to time.
Why hasn’t Mr Dragonbones shown us his latest oven exploit yet? Where’s the bread, man? Less about Mr Underhill’s astronomy and more about LOAVES.
And what about Taiwanese “girls” anyway? Some of my best students are Taiwanese girls, and I don’t FUCKING PREP!
Visa also rhymes with Rizzla if you’re drunk enough.[/quote]
When I first created the 5 step plan to self fulfillment I knew that it would help people like you, Mr Presley. Step 3 you already know. But I want to go back a little to step 2. It’s just before Step 3. Step 2 is to always be thinking one step ahead. Like a carpet layer, laying carpet on some stairs. Step 2 essentially tells you to focus on step 3. People think it is the easiest stage of my plan, but I’ll let you in on the big secret. It is actually the hardest step to master, because it requires you to ignore it completely. Letting go. Thats the key. Let go of your desires to learn of bread. Let go of your fear of planning. Spin the colour in your mind from red to blue. Accepting nothing is the hardest challenge.
Who eats carbs in this day and age?
The relationship between man and carbohydrates has long been questioned. On the one hand they allow freedom of movement, but on the other they make you a lackadaisical festerpot. This is gaia, tempting you to defy her. Just like her. My pamphlet: “Carbs are wankers,” has 63 handy tricks for helping you to reduce the severity of carb anxiety.
I tested your hypothesis, Mr Hill. Carburettors are a little crunchy, but less so if you sniff them first. Do you have a method for tenderizing them, or should I ask this on the food forum?
I know little of the art of cooking, I am mostly a relationship advice guru. I’m also more than a little bit holistic. I often hear my clients say ‘you are so holistic,’ or at least that is what it sounds like they are saying.
Holisticness is next to godliness. Keep fighting the good fight, Mr Hill.
Only for women.
How am I going to get my house clean, crapping on about nothing to people in the computer box all day? That is why I go to work.
[quote=“Buttercup”]
How am I going to get my house clean, crapping on about nothing to people in the computer box all day? That is why I go to work.[/quote]
Prioritise, dear Buttercup. Mr Tom Hill’s thread is earth-shatteringly profound and worthy of your “attentions” and “cooperations”. As a show of solidarity, I refuse to work today. I’m going to masturbate three times, drink a bottle of whisky, masturbate again, smoke 60 cigarettes, masturbate, contribute to this pertinent thread, masturbate, eat a whole fish, and then perhaps relax with some nice, exploitative pornography.
You shouldn’t smoke so much.
Sorry, Tom . . . your thread . . . I know.
[quote=“zender”]You shouldn’t smoke so much.
Sorry, Tom . . . your thread . . . I know.[/quote]
All valid points Zender. Milk Thistle will cure your natural desire to butt in.
[quote=“jimipresley”][quote=“Buttercup”]
How am I going to get my house clean, crapping on about nothing to people in the computer box all day? That is why I go to work.[/quote]
Prioritise, dear Buttercup. Mr Tom Hill’s thread is earth-shatteringly profound and worthy of your “attentions” and “cooperations”. As a show of solidarity, I refuse to work today. I’m going to masturbate three times, drink a bottle of whisky, masturbate again, smoke 60 cigarettes, masturbate, contribute to this pertinent thread, masturbate, eat a whole fish, and then perhaps relax with some nice, exploitative pornography.[/quote]
Punctuation has improved. You see how quickly the body responds to my hypnotic suggestions? The universe wants you to masturbate, and I am sure that you will only improve with time. The words [color=#BF0000]staznji otvor[/color] will help with your girlfriend and you burning anal issues.