Anyone remember those old Yuelong Cedric (diesel) long-distance taxis and the sort of nutters that drove them?
One day I’m standing outside a 7-11, minding my own business, when a wheel comes rolling along, out from a nearby traffic circle, falls over in front of me, like a scene from Roadrunner. Two minutes later a Cedric taxi comes grinding up the road on three wheels until the driver spots his missing wheel. He then sits in the car for ten minutes, smoking, hanging out, until he finally gets out to look at the spot his wheel should be, walks over to collect it, like butter wouldn’t melt in his mouth.
One thing comes to mind that I see daily in the gym. Some guys standing naked in front of mirrors with a blow dryer in one hand and their stretched out boy in another, drying it off. I know it’s to prevent crotch rot, but give me a break. I always imagine the reaction Kramer from Seinfeld would have had to such a scene. Then there are the types who are so paranoid about being seen nude that they try to put on their underwear under a towel tied around their waist. Maybe these are guys who forgot to use the hair dryer and have developed some rot:-)
Considering how prudish and conservative the Taiwanese tend to be when it comes to public nudity, I was rather surprised a few years back when I came upon a photo session with a stark-naked model right in the middle of a popular tourist spot (Wawagu, for those who know it, which is visited by thousands of people every weekend, and always has at least a trickle of tourists). She was posing on rocks with waterfalls in the background, in full view of anyone coming to enjoy the scenic delights of this lovely place. There were several other local tourists around at the time, including a mum and her kid, but they were all pretending not to notice the naked girl, looking anywhere but at the waterfalls that would normally be drawing most of their attention. Being the foreigner that I am, I stopped to watch and enjoy the view (she was young and very shapely). Then the model became aware of my attention, felt discomfited, said something to the photographer, and he turned towards me and very rudely and aggressively shouted at me: “Hei, ni! Gun kai!” The effrontery of it! I exploded and launched into a furious tirade against him, saying that if they did such things in a place like that then they’d bloody well have to put up with being watched by whoever came by, that I’d a good mind to beat him to a pulp for his rudeness, and that as they were breaking the law I ought to go and bring a policeman to arrest them. That shut them up, the photographer and the make-up girl mumbled a few conciliatory words, and they left it at that and got on with the shoot. I stayed watching for just long enough to underline my point, and then went on my way.
I was sad about not having any whack stories, until today.
I was on me way home when I saw a movie theater was across the street from my MRT stop (yongan market). I had been getting on there for about 2 weeks and never noticed it.
I’m thinking to myself “Yeah, I could watch movie here one day, that would be cool”. When I turn around to walk into the MRT station there’s this chubby guy with his pants pulled (way) down peeing into the drain. Everything was in full view. :shock:
Right there in the middle of everything thing, facing the street, people walking by. Seemed like I was the only one that noticed :?
Maybe after a few years here that won’t be so whack.
Hey,
I’ve enjoyed this thread so I’d like to offer an anecdote of mine. I was living in Hsin Tien and was about to leave for a two week trip back to England. Finding a safe parking space for this length of time was naturally quite a worry but eventually found a space along a stretch of road I often parked, no yellow or red line just free space. While I was away the local government painted a white parking space around my car, installed a parking meter and started charging me $30 per hour. I came back to a $4000 parking bill and a Is this car abandoned sticker on the side window.
Only in Taiwan
I was driving my scooter to work a couple of months ago and was going quite fast. All of a sudden the scooters in front started veering all over the place. What the hell was going on?
A big metal pot was slowly rolling across the road. Imagine it, almost being killed because a pot fell off some guys bike. A few weeks later I saw a kettle fall off some guys bike full of milk tea, bizarre.
One afternoon while sitting outside a restaurant, I heard a crash behind me. I turned around to see a taxi stopped in the middle of the road, and a helmet rolling down the street toward me. Obviously the taxi driver was pulling a u-turn and didn’t see the scooter coming towards him. The first thing I thougt was “Holy cow. I think somebody may have just died.” but a second later I saw a couple of kids get up and brush themselves off. I guess they weren’t going that fast. Anyway, I went over to pick up the helmet, and I saw this man walking toward me with a rather odd look on his face, sort of like he didn’t want to be noticed. Well, I got to the helmet first and took it over to the bike riders. It so happened that the accident happened in front of bank, so there were police right there. I handed them the helmet, but the guy I noticed before started to pick up the bike and walk off with it! He was going to try to steal this bike in full view of and not two feet away from a couple of cops. They mumbled something like “Put that down” and he walked away. That’s my whack story.
A guy I know ‘borrowed’ a car but didn’t have anywhere safe to leave it as he had no keys with which to unlock it again. He left it unlocked outside a police station for a week and went back and got it, figuring it would be safe there… the funny part is that battery and a tire had gone flat and so he showed up with jumper leads and a pump, cool as you like.
[quote=“Viba”]Hey,
I’ve enjoyed this thread so I’d like to offer an anecdote of mine. I was living in Hsin Tien and was about to leave for a two week trip back to England. Finding a safe parking space for this length of time was naturally quite a worry but eventually found a space along a stretch of road I often parked, no yellow or red line just free space. While I was away the local government painted a white parking space around my car, installed a parking meter and started charging me $30 per hour. I came back to a $4000 parking bill and a Is this car abandoned sticker on the side window.
Only in Taiwan[/quote]
Hey Viba, I too am pleased that my thread is doing so well…but your story reminds me of another…but it is somewhat of a dispute to your claim “Only in Taiwan”. I remember way back (and I mean waaaayyy back) in elementary school, a teacher was trying to explain to us that we could indeed fight city hall. He told us a story of a guy who got a parking ticket for parking beside a fire hydrant. The guy was sure he hadn’t and proved that the city had actually installed the hydrant during his car’s stay in the subsequently “illegal” space. The ticket was thrown out of court. Hooray for the little guy.
I guess this needs to be told as well. Given the generally kind and placid nature of the Taiwanese…I am always surprised to see incidents of road rage. Although far less frequent an event than back in Canada, when it does rear it’s ugly head, it is far more aggressive and brutal in it’s nature. Back in my Hsin Chu days (daze), I heard a commotion of loud, angry voices and looked across the street in time to see a scooter driver “whack” his helmet thru the rear window of a car that had somehow offended him. The car driver was justifiably terrified and tried to make his escape, but as we all know, a car doesn’t stand a snowball’s chance in hell of evading a scooter. Sorry to say (for the sake of the thread) that I don’t know the final outcome of the situation as they continued down the road, scooter guy screaming at terrified motorist, and subsequently, out of view. I am not a rubber-necker by nature, so I didn’t follow, and I was in a hurry to rent Mission Impossible 2 which had just come out. What do you think…could there have been more entertainment value if I had hopped on my trusty 4 stroke steed and followed the fight…John Woo vs Taiwan road rage…hmmmmmm??? I think I chose poorly that night… :?:
In Kaohsiung, I saw a blind man riding a bike against traffic. How did I know he was blind? He had a long white cane and was using it to tap out a “safe” route as he slowly inched along. I am not kidding.
And we have a winner…KBS, please report to the Bureau of Whack Statistics to claim your prize…the blind cyclist winds hands down…why…you’d have to be blind not to see that…
One morning, I saw my wife standing in the bathroom up to her ankles in water (the drain was plugged) blow drying her hair. If that’s not whack enough, she still to this day does not feel she was doing anything particularly dangerous.
Way back when I lived in Chungli, I saw a little poddle get run over by a car outside a bar. Moments earlier, the dog had been lapping the face of a little girl in the scooter repair shop beside the bar. When the dog was hit the mechanic ran out into the street after it. Seeing that the dog was in fact dead he crossed the street, carrying the dog by its tail, and tossed the body onto a pile of garbage. He then walked back to his shop without saying a word to the little girl and started working. When we left the bar that night you could still see the little white corpse atop the pile of trash.
I still recall the amazement at learning that kids here are taught to walk up the street with the traffic flow rather than against it. This in a land where the sidewalk only sporadically exists.
Hsiadogah, it makes perfect sense to walk with the traffic flow. When your little daughter walking next to you in the traffic get smacked by a car/scooter the combined speed is less than walking against the traffic.
A few years ago i bought a new scoot and went to 45 pub for a couple of beers and something to eat. Having been fed and watered emerged a couple of hours later to find my scoot with the lights still on, the keys in the ingnition and the engine still turning over.
