The occasions I’ve been approached by Taiwanese men have been few and far between. Granted I’m not really a “friendly” person.
And when I say friendly, I mean I’m not the sort of person who likes to make small talk with strangers. I’m not opposed to meeting new people; I’d just prefer to meet through mutual friends rather than on the MRT.
With that said, I have noticed that there have been two general ways I’ve been approached…
The first is the “I want to practice my English” scenario. I understand I’m a guest in this country and I should be respectful… But I am annoyed that some people expect me to give impromptu English lessons. At some point during the “lesson” there’s always the inevitable question… Do you have a boyfriend? Even if I started out without a boyfriend, I always have one at the end of it.
The second is where I’m approached like some sort of fascinating creature. Perhaps a cross between an exotic fish and a space alien. There’s a lot of blushing, smiling, staring… And, if the gentleman in question has a few friends with him, you can add pointing and whispering.
Let me just say… In my humble opinion these are NOT good ways to approach a Western looking woman. My suggestion, be confident and avoid treating the object of your desire like an English teacher or space alien. A sense of humor is always a plus (so is a cute dog :scooby: ).
I’d say <a href="http://tw.forumosa.com/t/pick-up-lines-in-taiwan/13065/107 You’re lucky
Other than that psycho, I have also had guys follow me around asking where I am going. One who I was at the end kicking him trying to get him to go away and he wasn’t going away even then (shop owner rescued me).
I have never been hit on by a Taiwanese man here in a way that I did not find, at the least, creepy. Then again, more than half the white guys who have hit on me here have gotten the “creepy” rating.
I think it is just a cultural difference. The things that work and the girls here do NOT work on the girls from where I am from.
And before anyone gives me the “your boyfriend is Taiwanese” thing, I approached him. He was scared of me.
Just to squirt a little lighter fluid on the fire, there might be some truth to this. Consider that in 2005, 1 in 4.2 marriages in Taiwan were to foreigners, the vast majority of which were Taiwanese men to Chinese and Vietnamese brides (seen the ads on TV?). A friend of mine puts this to Taiwanese women expecting to be treated more as equals, which most traditionally patriarchal Taiwanese men won
Regarding this issue, I think Taiwanese men are typically rather shy to approach foreign women because there are often fewer opportunities for them to really “meet and know” foreign women in the way they might women in their own culture. Think about it: in nearly any culture, guys have the burden of showing interest and asking the girl out. In Taiwanese culture, it seems to be more “friends first” than in western culture. When do most Taiwanese men have the opportunity of having meaningful daily interactions with foreign women, such as one might have at work? In general, foreign women here are young teachers or came with a partner. The native teachers are female; the only man you’ll usually encounter in a school is a custodian. I think that’s a big part of it.
I think that the patriarchal attitude is pretty prevalent, but there certainly are some wonderful exceptions.
My roomate has had more TW boyfriends than I can keep track of. She isn’t a supermodel, she’s a girl-next-door type. What she is that gets her what she’s got is fun and flirtatious. Anyway, she mentioned to me that she doesn’t like the TW guys who approach her on the street. She goes for the ones that she likes, and approaches them. That’s how she says she finds the nice ones.
It’s hard to approach girls, man. I know. But maybe you’re being too aggressive and scaring them off.
Just to squirt a little lighter fluid on the fire, there might be some truth to this. Consider that in 2005, 1 in 4.2 marriages in Taiwan were to foreigners, the vast majority of which were Taiwanese men to Chinese and Vietnamese brides (seen the ads on TV?). A friend of mine puts this to Taiwanese women expecting to be treated more as equals, which most traditionally patriarchal Taiwanese men won
Okay. I am going to have to laugh heartily at the girl who says Taiwan boys are shy to approach western women. Being that I deal with at least 3 creepy, WAY over aggressive assholes a week. Like the one today that I actually got off the train to get away from WHO GOT OFF THE TRAIN ALSO and then told me “this isn’t my stop”. ARG!!! There is not an emoticon strong enough to express this. I am pretty sure he was expecting me to find this cute or something.
:fume: :raspberry: :grrr:
I got on the train going the opposite way the second it showed up, he tried to follow me onto it but I ran as the doors were closing and hopped into a different train than the one I originally tried to get on. I mean, seriously. I can’t help but wonder why girls say the guys here are shy, Shy of the ability to get a fucking hint, maybe. :wanker:
Whatever. I think this might be the answer to the age old question of why white chicks don’t date Taiwanese guys. These psychos who do things like this (be it a small percent of the population) train us to run and hide when one approaches us. I have been in Taiwan for 1 year and I have met more men that make me want to run screaming than I did the whole time I was in the states. And that’s a lot.
So maybe that’s the answer.
Then again, I wouldn’t give a stranger my phone number if he was hot and had a good approach and I was single. I could give a shit less what a man looks like (he could look like brad pitt and takeshi kaneshiros love child and I wouldn’t care) and would be completely turned off by the idea that his attraction to me was 100% based on my looks. Fuckallthat.
Ji423u5y:
That is a lot of girl’s method of enforcing that you are just a friend. It is a subtle version of “you don’t count”.
[quote=“SuchAFob”]
Ji423u5y:
That is a lot of girl’s method of enforcing that you are just a friend. It is a subtle version of “you don’t count”.[/quote]
No it’s the female version of “(s)He’s just not into you”
Also, some Taiwanese men might think that “western” women are interested in them at first because they get some sort of false vibe. Then when they get turned down, they don’t understand. Face it, “western” women probably know that Taiwanese men are attracted to them more than men back home. Same works on the other side of the coin. Women get off on this because women like the “you can’t have me” factor. It turns them on. Then later they can say, “Oh this guy was following me. I’m beeeeeeeeeeeautiful!”
:grrr: