I’ll listen to that one, Flike. His avatar is very scary :lovestruck:
Steve (may I call you Steve??
Ok, I understand where you are coming from but I don’t agree with it.
If two children are playing and one child hits the second with a big stick, is that ok? The she/he called me a bad name so therefore I needed to as well should be left in the playground. I know that we’ll guilty of it at some point, but that doesn’t make it ok.
Secondly, you perceived her comment to be self serving based on your experience with other people? With written words on the internet it’s not always safe to assume that the people you’ve had experience are the same as the ones that you’ve never meet. Maybe you projected some of your feelings for these other people onto Travel Goddess. I’m saying this cause I certainly did not get the same things that you did from her post. Is it possible??
heh huh huh huh heh heh
[url=Women's Forum - How does one join? thread[/url] covers ways of joining the women’s forum.
Note that Alien has passed the moderator role onto me, and for the moment I’m following her procedure as described for checking your credentials 
Does the Women’s Forum have “Guest Memberships” for men? How does one apply?
Check the Site Map at the bottom of every page 
It’s called “Women’s Only” and at the bottom right corner
Uh… would you consider a sex change? 
If she can say her piece, what is so wrong about any of us giving ours in return? I don’t think the “playground” analogy fits too well here. This is, after all, an open forum.
As Chewy said…this is the same person who wanted to charge people to view her web blog. Now, maybe I’m wrong but in checking it out it didn’t dissolve any of what I thought of her post. But c’mon can anyone sit here and tell me she wasn’t making general statements AND subtly (sp?) criticizing the foreign men for being so “entranced” by the local women? I used my experiences to back up my argument, not as a tentpole.
But hey, you know what bottom line is that her comments aren’t gonna sit well with many of us, the “entranced” foreign guys. And if you can’t handle the realities of being here, then that’s just too bad. :boo-hoo: I think ML said…now you know what it’s like when the shoe is on the other foot. I completely agree with that.
Everyone needs to find their place, of course. So I admit I may have been too harsh, but this is how I was raised and how I perceive things. And I know it’s wrong, but I hold others to that as well. :s Buck it up, tough it out, and persevere. No amount of complaining will change anything in the toughest of spots. So yea. That’s all just me, though. :homer: <~~ the homer is in accordance with Richardm’s post 
Tatonga’s a dude? My bad. That was the first post of his I’ve noticed.
I think it’s pretty apparent that bababa’s African men thread is criticizing Taiwanese men. ~ That’s not cool either, but hey, thus far no evidence of Western woman attacking Western men. 
[/quote]
That’s because they’ve gotten very practiced at burying the bodies. :fume:
In my opinion Forumosa is a male-dominated realm. That’s just the way it’s evolved to date, for whatever reasons. As far as the “battle of the sexes” goes, on the one hand you get some interesting, honest insights in the way men perceive women. On the other hand they’re not always very pleasant things to hear. Women just don’t have the weight of numbers here, in terms of individuals or posting frequency and we’re not likely to in the near future, due in part to the prevailing attitudes on the forum. You will take notice that I’m not complaining about this - I’m calling it the way I see it.
Women are in general more reluctant to get in there and argue, because we take insults more personally than men, who are trained to deal with “friendly” abuse from a very young age This is a very broad generalisation, of course, but I think it explains some of the reluctance of many women to post. In order to be comfortable posting here, you have to be willing and able to take a fair amount of heat for anything you might say that disagrees with majority opinion. Sometimes, particularly for sensitive issues, it’s just not worth the effort.
That’s why Forumosa needs, and thankfully has, a women’s forum.[/quote]
I agree with everything posted here by daasgrrl (including the generalisations) and especially the bit about boys being trained to deal with insults, but I do find that having a special section for any one group just turns into de-facto segregation.
In this case, the result is that the girls go off and give each other advice while the boys have their testerone driven shouting matches. (If the stereotypes above are being maintained that is…)
Which, IMO, suggests there’s not much actual communication between the sexes going on.
The thread in which travelgoddess and Stevezeauthor ranted at each other would seem to be a case in point. I doubt that either of them changed their opinions or learned much from that little exchange of views.
Perhaps, I’m expecting too much from an internet chat site.
[quote=“Beachside Queenslander”]
The thread in which travelgoddess and Stevezeauthor ranted at each other would seem to be a case in point. I doubt that either of them changed their opinions or learned much from that little exchange of views.
Perhaps, I’m expecting too much from an internet chat site.[/quote]
Probably. It seems to me that women on Forumosa have been unusually bothered by the spat between Travelgoddess and SteveZeAuthor. Take a look at the IP fights between fred smith, Flipper, Alien, Rascal and others. Those folks go on ad nauseum with neither party giving any ground.
Perhaps in a face to face chat, people are more likely to seek compromise or at least offer a “Gee, I see your point.” On the internet, I think people are more likely to defend their turf wholeheartedly. Even if you are being hammered by other posters and being made the fool, you can simply turn off your computer and forget the whole thing. Anonymity provides a great defense. Guys in general will take things less personally. IMO. So, we can yak nonsense on this site, hurl abuse, receive abuse and then sit down and watch a video or read a book without worrying about anything that was said on Forumosa. I usually forget every post I wrote by the end of the day.
Travelgoddess has disapeared. SteveZeAuthor is ever present. I thought their debate was pretty even, each making valid points and throwing insults. To me, as a guy, it seems odd that she would be offended by her bout with SteveZeAuthor. I hope she comes back.
[quote=“smerf”]Probably. It seems to me that women on Forumosa have been unusually bothered by the spat between Travelgoddess and SteveZeAuthor. Take a look at the IP fights between fred smith, Flipper, Alien, Rascal and others. Those folks go on ad nauseum with neither party giving any ground.
[/quote]
The difference seems to me that those people in the IP Forum like to argue. It’s how they get their jollies. Travelgoddess, on the other hand, didn’t seem to be hellbent on looking for a fight. She was just having a bad day and needed a shoulder to cry on, a place to vent. Which was a mistake, as obviously an internet forum isn’t the best place to look for sympathy - since by its nature it seems internet forums are more macho fight clubs than girls sitting around in a circle moaning about boyfriends and going ‘there, there dear’.
You mean ‘forums where men dominate’. Internet forums where women dominate - and there are quite a few - can be exactly like that.
ETA: BQ, while I think there’s a lot of very valuable information on this site, I really think the vast majority of people who hold strong pre-existing opinions on any topic aren’t going to change them for anyone. The battle is for the hearts and minds of the undecided, for the sake of argument itself, or just to air them out and check that they still work
[quote=“mod lang”]
The difference seems to me that those people in the IP Forum like to argue. It’s how they get their jollies. Travelgoddess, on the other hand, didn’t seem to be hellbent on looking for a fight. She was just having a bad day and needed a shoulder to cry on, a place to vent. Which was a mistake, as obviously an internet forum isn’t the best place to look for sympathy - since by its nature it seems internet forums are more macho fight clubs than girls sitting around in a circle moaning about boyfriends and going ‘there, there dear’.[/quote]
There were several posters who supported TG’s position. But, it seems naive to me to think that you can post on a chat site and expect everyone to agree with your opinion or that you won’t be challenged - even outside the realm of politics. I feel for TG if she is lonely or feels isolated in Tainan. I’m sure that most of us here have felt that way a time or two in Taiwan.
I think Mod is entirely right and most people reading the TG post knew to ignore it if they disagreed or add their “there, there” if they felt sympathetic. I also think TG needs to hang around longer and let people know her more. Nothing like having the wrath of your online friends to deal with people who can’t be bothered to read between the lines.
Agreed, like Mod himself when he wrote this tidbit after TG’s original post. I guess there’s a “there, there” in there somewhere.
I for one agree with a lot (if not all) of what daasgrrl has said here. Forumosa IS male-dominated, and I think a lot of women are put off from posting (myself included) because they’re worried they’ll have their head bitten off if they do, and perhaps knowing they can’t cope with it, choose not to post in the first place.
Sure a sense of humour is needed, and a certain amount of flack is to be expected (especially if you’re posting opinions which are likely to raise strong feelings).
Forumosa wouldn’t be an interesting, intellectually engaging site if everyone just sat around agreeing with each other. - And this is the exact reason why people should be concerned that the sight is not friendly towards females, the broader the range of opinions and backgrounds of people posting the more interesting the site (IMO).
[quote=“salt”]
Forumosa wouldn’t be an interesting, intellectually engaging site if everyone just sat around agreeing with each other. - And this is the exact reason why people should be concerned that the sight is not friendly towards females, the broader the range of opinions and backgrounds of people posting the more interesting the site (IMO).[/quote]
Although I don’t see Forumosa as “not friendly towards females,” I am concerned that many women won’t post on here because they feel the environment is too hostile. On one hand, I’d hate to think that anything I wrote has offended a gal so much that she has left Forumosa never to return. On the other hand, however, I don’t want to censure myself to the point that I can’t express my thoughts out of fear I will offend someone. If Forumosa gets too PC, then it would lose its charm and be rather boring. IMO. Just not sure what to do. 
Smerf,
There’s no sitting on the fence with this one; you’re either a sensitive new age guy or you’re one of the lads. So, what’s it gonna be? 
Or you could try this: don’t post anything you would feel uncomfortable with if your …(insert female: wife, sister, mother, or female friend) were to read it.
[quote=“almas john”]
Smerf,
There’s no sitting on the fence with this one; you’re either a sensitive new age guy or you’re one of the lads. So, what’s it gonna be? 
Or you could try this: don’t post anything you would feel uncomfortable with if your …(insert female: wife, sister, mother, or female friend) were to read it.[/quote]
I’m totally with the lads.
Earlier post was just for show, trying to keep the ladies happy. Such is the burden of every man. 